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Filming Jokes

Sean Connery arrives at a grand hotel ready for filming the next day

The director meets him, and is delighted "great to see you, Sean, its an honour to have you join us for this project" he says.

"The pleasure is mine" Sean replies, "though it's been a long drive and I'm tired. Is my room ready?"

"Of course, of course, I have your key right here", he sa...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I tried filming myself eating dried meat with an old cine camera

But it was jerky

The moon landing was staged

The moon landing was staged and it was shot by Stanley Kubrick, the reason it looks so real is because of Kubrick's obsession with filming on location.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two pornstars get sent home from a mission trip in Africa, after they were caught filming themselves having sex.

Their response: "What? They said it was missionary work."

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I just got done filming a porno in my hotel room [NSFW]

You can find it on the net. It’s called “drunk guy jerks off in a hotel room and then cries”

A motion picture crew is filming a Christmas movie.

A motion picture crew is filming a Christmas movie. The director wants to sprinkle white laundry soap flakes in front of the camera to simulate snowfall, so he sends his producer to the grocery store to buy some laundry soap.

The producer comes back several hours later. "It's the pandemic, ...

Die Hard producers just announced filming’s started on the 6th installment of Bruce Willis’ popular action franchise.

It’ll be called Get Hard or Die Trying

Tom Cruise is filming a new romantic-action movie in support of body positivity. Both him and the lead actress gained 300lbs for the role.

The movie is called: Missionary Impossible.

Filming *Aladdin* must have been physically very hard on Will Smith.

I understand that at the end of each day shooting he was black and blue.

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Guy Fieri walks into a dive bar/restaurant after a long day of filming.

The menu board lists:

$5 Grilled Cheese Sandwich

$10 Growler of Beer

$25 Handjob

$50 Blowjob

The gorgeous bartender sees him at the bar and seductively asks what he'd like to order. Guy asks her if she is the woman performing the handjobs and blowjobs, to which s...

Droids claim they were molested by George Lucas during filming for Star Wars...

#R2MeToo

A director wanted to make a movie about Batman, but sadly D.C. wouldn't allow him to film it.

He decided he would just make the movie anyway, but instead of using the character's real names he would take away the last letter of their names.

Batman became Batma and he fought crime with his trusty partners Alfre and Robi. The film then showed the dynamic duo and their butler fighting cr...

I heard Dwayne Johnson is filming a movie about retrieving documents from the leader of ancient Rome

It's going to be a Rock, Paper, Caesar's shoot.

My ex-girlfriend got paid under the table for her work filming "creampie" adult videos. So I alerted the IRS.

They nailed her for unreported in-come.

There's a new documentary planned about flying

They're filming the pilot.

Just came off a job filming an advert for Mexican food.

I thought the last shot was of some tortillas, but as we finished, the director shouted, 'That's a wrap.'

I uploaded a video to YouTube of me filming around my windowless house.

Zero views.

What airline does Sophie Turner use when she's filming Game of Thrones?

Luftsansa

What do terrorists, and a filming of The Hunchback of Notre Dame have in common?

They were both shot on location.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I've just taken part in the filming of a pilot for a new quiz show called "Guess That Penis"...

Unfortunately, I didn't win, but I did get through to the boners round…

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I was supposed to be filming a porno but I was late to the set.

The cameraman phoned me up and said, "Will you be long?"

I said, "Yes, around 9 inches."

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