UPJOKE
theaterticket officeticket boothrevenuemovie theatertheatreboxhousemovieticketgrossbox seatonenextfilm industry

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Fifty Shades got $47 Million at the box office...

There seems to be a lot of women who don't get offended by a billionaire grabbing a girl by the pussy.

Why do movies with Kevin Hart and Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson pairing do well in the box office?

Because they have a little Hart and a big Johnson

At the box office this weekend Predator took first place and The Nun took second.

Coincidently, that’s how the Catholic Church ranks it’s priorities.

Fishes just finished it's box office run

It flopped.

Why was the movie about fly fishing a box office flop?

Bad casting.

That clown movie topping the box office is the real reason why we've been having so many hurricanes

Because when IT reigns, it pours.

A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box office....

....Suddenly, he feels somebody kneading his shoulders, back, and neck.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?"
"I'm a chiropractor, and I'm just keeping in practice while I'm waiting in line."
"Well, I'm a lawyer, but you don't see me screwing the guy in front of me, do you?"

50 shades of grey broke a lot of box office records for R-rated movies…

Well first it tied them, then it beat them.

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Galley Chick

The Airliner pushed back from the gate, the flight attendant gave the passengers the usual information regarding seat belts, etc.

Finally, she said, "Now sit back and enjoy your trip while your captain, Judith Campbell, and crew take you safely to your destination."

Ed sitting in the ...

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Female flight

A man boards a flight from london to chicago. before they are due to leave, a voice comes over the intercom and says, on behalf of captain natalie, we hope you enjoy the flight!.

Well, the man isn't best impressed, and once in the air he calls the crew over.



he asks, " Is it t...

The turtle wanted to see an erotic movie once in his life.

But the box office wouldn't let her in, so she sat down in front of the cinema and started crying.

A young man walked by and asked the turtle what was wrong. She explained what had happened and the man suggested that he could hide her in his pants if the turtle would buy him a ticket. He woul...

Did you hear about that new terrorist movie?

It was a box office bomb

I heard they made a Minesweeper movie

It bombed at the box office, but somehow ended up sweeping the oscars.

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So, one fine day, a man is strolling through an open-air market place.

He stops at one of the live animal stalls and buys a chicken thinking that he will take it home, and make a nice chicken stew for dinner. On his way home he passes a theater that is showing a movie that he has been wanting to see and he decides to go in. The woman at the box office sees the chicken ...

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When you have an all male crew flying a plane....

... it’s called a cockpit.

If you have an all female crew it’s a box office.

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Topical Jokes (5/21)

Here we are, once again. It's time for some laugh-words.

First up, we've got some big movie news. "Transformers 4" is now updating its cast. To appeal more to the US box office, the evil Decepticons will be played by menacing vending machines that won't let go of your Doritos.

More mov...

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