Experimenting Jokes

Monkeys were an obvious choice, but they had no patience. Mice chewed all the cables, dogs were too stupid and chickens were always scared. It seemed the only animal that could cope with the intense stress of space travel was a chilled out alley cat.

After a few months of testing and training... read more

He pulls one leg off and says 'Fly, walk'. The fly walks.

He pulls the second leg off and says 'Fly, walk'. Again, the fly walks.

He continues until he gets to the last leg. Pulling it off, he says 'Fly, walk'. The fly does not walk. He repeats the command, but the fly does not shift ... read more

----Experiment log #1938----

Removed the front legs of a frog and asked it to jump. The frog jumped.

Conclusion: when you remove the front legs of a frog, it can still jump.

___________________________________________

Removed the back legs of a frog. Asked it to jump. The... read more

...they both have their ups and downs.

I'll see myself out.

He says: "Jump!".

The frog jumps, and the man writes down: " The frog with four legs jumps".

He then cuts one of the frog's legs and says: "Jump!".

The frog jumps, and the man writes down: "The frog with three legs jumps".

He then cuts another leg and says: "Jump!".
... read more

But I’m used to hunting in the daytime so this is just a shot in the dark

A few years after the end of WWII, a Soviet scientist is doing some experimentation on a frog. He had previously taught it to jump, if he hears the word "jump".



The scientist says "jump!" to the frog, who jumps. Then the scientist cuts of one leg, then he says jump again, the frog ju... read more

First, he found a frog and said: "Jump". The frog jumped 2 feet into the air. The scientist recorded this in his notebook.

Next, he carefully pulled one leg off the frog, and told it to jump. It jumped 8 inches into the air, so he recorded this.

He pulled off yet anothe... read more

The study concluded that the resulting specimens lack toes in taller ants.

I ultimately accepted defeat.

After many frustrating attempts, the farmer announced to his friends, "Well I finally did it! I bred a turkey that has 6 legs!"

They all asked the farmer how it tasted.

"I don't know" said the farmer. "I never could catch the darn thing!"

He put the flea on the table told him to jump and the flea jumped. Then he took him and cut of his legs and told him to jump again but the flea didn't move.

After seeing this the scientist concluded in his notes "After you cut a fleas legs he can't hear anymore."

They remove the right side of a subject’s brain. When he wakes up they ask him to count to ten.

“2, 4, 6, 8, 10” He answers.

The scientists put his right side back in and remove the left half. After surgery they have him count to ten again.

“1, 3, 5, 7, 9” He says.

The sc... read more

The scientist tells the frog, “Jump frog! Jump!”

And then the frog leaps 4 feet across the testing table. So the scientist marks down in his notebook, “frog with 4 legs jump 4 feet”

The scientist then brandishes a large cooking cleaver and chops off one of the front legs of the frog.... read more

It's Frankenstein's Muenster.

The sign outside says, “Come on in and rest for a spell”.

He exclaims, "I was just mething around!"

It’s open to anyone but me.

They cut off one of its leg and asks it to jump and it jumps they keep repeating it and when all its feet are gone they had to come to a conclusion why it didn't jump....

Conclusion: Frog is deaf after 4 legs cut

When I do it, I'm "fired" and "a terrible dorm janitor"

It’s titled “The FeCAl Matter.”

She was bound to like it eventually