Your essays should be like a girls skirt.

Long enough to cover the subject, short enough to keep it interesting and on the desk by Friday midnight.

My dad told me that colleges are cracking down on ghost-written essays...

I asked, “What about mummy-written essays?”

Martin Luther was amazing at writing essays

He was known to NAIL them.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Know your homonyms

As teacher was correcting essays written by her students she read, "Pedro jumped on his burrow and rode off into the sunset."

She wrote at the bottom of the page, "You obviously have problems with homonyms. A burrow is a hole in the ground. A burro is an ass. At your age it's time to lea...

Why do spaniards frequently plagiarize essays?

Because nobody inspects the Spanish exposition!

50% of essays

Is the letter 's'.

"How long should my essay be?"

Back in high school I was in an english class and a fellow student asked the teacher how long our essays should be.

He responded saying, "As long as a girl's skirt: long enough to cover everything that needs to be covered, but short enough to keep me interested."

I used to get paid to write other students essays in high school.

Everyone failed.

I pour maple syrup over my essays

Because they're 100% waffle.

For school I had to write a thousand word essay

So I drew a picture

Where does Chewbacca research his college essays?


I’ve been working at a charity, teaching college education to reformed Mexican gangsters.

It’s not going very well because for some reason they refuse to turn in their essays.

Why was El Chapo so popular among academics?

There were many *essays* around him

I like my children how I like my essays.

Unplanned and poorly executed

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