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Educate Jokes

Two educated men are in a public restroom

One finishes at the urinal and proceeds to walk out the bathroom door

"Hey!" the other man calls "What college do you go to?"

"Yale" the man replies

"Don't they teach you to wash your hands at Yale?" the other man says with a smirk

"What college do YOU go to?" he asks
...

I educate my kids using r/jokes

It teaches them that you gain karma by recycling trash.

An English teacher has volunteered to educate prisoners at a local prison.

Teahcer: "can you tell me please, what comes after every sentence?"

One of the prisoners then responds with;
"that's easy. Parole."

Educated people are hot.

Because they have high degrees

A priest who came to a village in Africa which was very ignorant, was trying to educate the natives.

While he preached every morning that people should do good and be kind to each other, he would try to teach English to the head of the tribe in the afternoon. One day the priest took the chief with him and started walking
Meanwhile, he was trying to increase the knowledge of the chief by saying t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Alright class. Today, we're going to educate all teens about safe sex.

Or E.A.T.A.S.S for short

Yale educated

The bank manager noticed the new clerk was not good at counting money and adding up figures.


"Where did you get your financial education?" he asked.


"Yale," replied the lad.


"And what's your name?" barked the manager.


"Yim Yohnston," he replied...

What does an educated owl say?

WHOM

Every educated person in the world knows now 5-10 Ukrainian words

But can't use any of them in public.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A math professor, John, is having problems with his sink so he calls a plumber.

The plumber comes over and quickly fixes the sink. The professor is happy until he gets the bill. He tells the plumber, "How can you charge this much? This is half of my paycheck." But he pays it anyways.

The plumber tells him, "Hey, we are looking for more plumbers. You could become a plumbe...

What do you call an educated vampire?

Dr.Acula

When I was a kid I used to admire educated people, but now I realized well mannered people are better than educated ones...

Little did I know you have to lack both to become president of the United States

A Jewish father was very troubled by the way his son turned out and went to see his rabbi about it.

“Rabbi, I brought him up in the faith, gave him a very expensive Bar Mitzvah and it cost me a fortune to educate him. Then he tells me last week, he’s decided to be a Christian. Rabbi, where did I go wrong?”

The rabbi strokes his beard and says, “Funny you should come to me. I too, brought up...

I guess you could say I'm educated

To a degree

Which is the most educated nut?

mAcademia.

Which is the most educated dinosaur?

The Thesaurus

All Americans should be educated as to what propaganda is when it’s constantly being thrown at them.

Propaganda is when a British person takes a good look at something.

An uneducated father with his educated son

An uneducated father with his educated son went on a camping trip. They set-up their tent and fell asleep.
Some hours later, the father woke up his son.
Father- Look up to the sky and tell me what you see.
Son- I see millions of stars.
Father- And what does that tell you?
Son- Astrono...

Educated Sons

1st son : Degree in Economics.
2nd son: MBA.
3rd son : PhD
4th son : Thief

Neighbour: Why can’t you throw the
4th son out of your house?

Father : He is the only one earning money. The rest are unemployed.

I'm proud to say that I sponsor a kid in Africa. I feed clothe and educate him all for less than 30 cents a day!

That's peanuts when compared to what it cost to send him there

What do you call a well educated farmer?

A farmacist

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

a well educated penis

is one that rises so the lady can sit down

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Nobody educates the boys about their first boner…

They learn it the hard way.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A report has concluded that paedophiles should be re-educated.

What a great idea, let's send paedophiles back to school.

Sending kids back to school at this time will make them over educated but dead inside.

I mean we already have millenials.

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