UPJOKE
consciousnessconscioussensibleawakeunawareknowsensitiveunderstandawarenessperceptioncognitivemindfulnesscarefulalertexperience

Awareness Jokes

The other day I learned about the Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon, which is when increased awareness of something causes you to create the illusion of it happening more frequently

I’ve been seeing a lot more examples of it lately

Three ghosts were talking about what was keeping them from being promoted from ghoul to specter.



The first confessed, "I have a weakness for boooooooooooooobs."

The second admitted, "I drink too much boooooooooooooze."

The third said, "I lack situational awareness."

Diarrhoea Awareness Week starts on Monday

Runs until Friday.

Twice a year there is a newsletter released about dried fruit.

On those dates it is raisin awareness of currant events.

September is Alzheimer's Awareness Month

Never forget...

Just saw that our local Police Department got 2 huge new trucks with "Criminal Gang Unit" labeled on the sides.

Finally, some self awareness.

A lot of people call Valentine’s Day “singles awareness day,” but that’s actually today

4/04 date not found

Can we dissect a classic joke??

I was driving through a rural area this afternoon when a chicken began to cross the road.

I chuckled at the little clucker and began to recite the classic joke in my head...

"Why did the chicken cross the road??"

I arrived at a predictable reaction; "this is a boring joke...it's...

Did you hear that Adelle started a campaign to raise awareness for sea life by reading Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone while scuba diving 60 ft under the water.

They called it "Rowling in the Deep"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Tim and Jake goes to watch a football game

Tim : What is that on players back?

Jake : Oh that, the players have written their name in braille to raise awareness about blind people.

Tim : Raise awareness about blind people. Who the fuck doesn't know about blind people.

Jake : Well the deaf have never heard about them.

A scientist is testing a robot that he has just built, and takes him to a baseball game to test his awareness without the robot’s eyes working.

They arrive at the game and take their seats. The home team, the Boston Red Sox is losing the game 2 runs to nothing to New York. The scientist leans over and says to the robot “Run down: 2, New York” The robot takes this as a command and quickly runs to New York from Boston, arriving back just befo...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It's Valentine's Day in the United States, and I'd just like everyone to know my girlfriend has giant, fake tits, and a huge fake dump truck.

In fact, pretty much everything on her is fake, including her existence.

Happy Single's Awareness Day, Reddit.

I went on a diabetes awareness webiste

...and it asked me if I accept cookies. Is this a trick question?

Happy Stutter Awareness Day

Tu-tu-tu-tu-tu-tuesday

I was telling my children about the health benefits of eating dried fruits recently

It's really all about raisin awareness.

Did anyone else know September is deaf awareness month?

I’d never heard of it.

Since its international Stoke awareness day

3 old ladies are sitting on a bench together and a flasher runs up to them and exposes himself, the first old lady has a look and then has a stroke, the second old lady also has a look then has a stroke, but the third old lady was too far away and it hurt to stand up so she just had a look

To raise heart health awareness, Cardi B changes her name...

To Cardi O

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

4 Men at a bar discuss the most difficult sport to play. The first man, wide as a dishwasher and having huge muscles all over, says

“I’m a football player, it’s the hardest sport in the world to play! You’ve gotta be in top physical condition and have excellent situational awareness.”

The second man, an older gentleman wearing a collared shirt, says “Sorry champ, but the actual hardest sport to play is golf. Every swing o...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did a mathematician named his dog Cauchy?

Let me test math awareness of this sub. This was told by a professor in a class.

Answer: because it left residue at every pole!

William Shakespeare came to get vaccinated.

Nurse: Which arm?

Shakespeare: As You Like It

Nurse: Was that painful?

Shakespeare: Much Ado About Nothing

Nurse: You will have to have a second jab.

Shakespeare: Measure For Measure

Nurse: So what do you think of the general awareness with regard to Covi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Nutty Joke

I made this up while playing around at work, but I'm sure it's already been come up with at some point; however I would like to submit this joke:

Ask someone, "do you participate in No Nuts November?" They will either smile, look confused, or both. Then tell them that it's a peanut allergy aw...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.