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A school bus full of Catholic girls drives off a cliff and they all die.

A bus filled with 18 year old sheltered Catholic school girls drove off a cliff and they all died. So they all form a single file line in front of the gates of heaven and saint Peter says to the first girl "have you ever touched a man's penis?" And the girl says "yes but just with the tip of my fing...

My son told my husband he got a part in his school play & he’ll be playing a man who has been married for 25 years.

My husband replied, maybe next time you’ll get a speaking part.

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A school bus full of Catholic girls get in a terrible accident

Nobody survives. All the girls find themselves standing in line at The Pearly Gates. At the front of the line is the angel Gabriel, next to him is a bowl of holy water.

He asks the first girl, "Lucy, have you ever touched a penis before?" Lucy responds, "Well... just once. Billy showed me hi...

At school, Little Johnny’s classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it’s very easy to blackmail them by saying, “I know the whole truth.”

Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. Johnny’s mother greets him at home, and he tells her, “I know the whole truth.” His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, “Just don’t tell your father.”
Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, “I kn...

Mohammad, a child of Arab parents was enrolled in a school in New York. On the first day, his teacher asked, ‘What is your name?’ The boy replied, ‘Mohammad’.

‘From now on your name is Harry as you are in America,’ she said.

In the evening, when he came back, his mother asked, ‘How was your day Mohammad?’ He said, ‘My name is not Mohammad. I’m in America and my name is Harry.’ His mother slapped him and said angrily: ‘Aren’t you ashamed of trying t...

A high school senior visits a psychic...

"I've applied to 10 different colleges," the student said. "Which ones will accept me? Which one will I attend?"

"That is hard to say," said the psychic. "But you will spend an absurd sum of money."

"How do you know this?" the student asked.

The psychic replied,

"It's mo...

The school phoned me today and said, "Your son's has been telling lies." I said,

"Tell him, he's bloody good. I don't have any kids”

Kim Jong-Un walks into a school in North Korea.

He asks a student "Who is your father?

The student replies "The Supreme Leader, infinite in wisdom and kindness, provider and protector of the Koreans, he is our only father."

Kim Jong beams. "Excellent. Now tell me who is your mother?"

The student doesn't hesitate. "The Land of...

What’s the difference between a Pakistani elementary school and an Al-qaeda outpost?

I dunno man I just fly the drone.

Mom: What did you do at school today?

Me: We did a guessing game

Mom: But I thought you had a math exam.

Me: That's right!

Vladimir Putin visits a primary school one day

And he gives a lecture about how great the government is, and how Russia is the best country in the world.
At the end of the lecture he invites people to ask questions and one kid stands up and says
“Hello my name is Sasha and I have two questions”
Putin: “go ahead”
Sasha: “Why did Russi...

After failing maths, Jared's parents decide to move him from the local public school to a nearby Catholic school

Within a few months, he is passing with flying colours. His parents ask him the reason behind his sudden improvement. "Was it the strict nuns, the rigour of class, the example of other students? Jared shook his head. "Well what was it then"? Jared replied "Truth is, when I first arrived and saw tha...

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A Marine Sergeant recently returned from Afghanistan attends his 10 year high school reunion

At the 10 year reunion for Lockwood High School class of 2010, Allison is getting a fresh drink when she runs into Jim. Jim was a bit awkward and quiet in high school, but now he's wearing a Marine sergeant's uniform, with a row of ribbons.

Allison strikes up a conversation and Jim has become...

A girl tells her mother after school ‘Mum, I got a gold star today for reciting the whole alphabet! The rest of my class only knows 3 or 4 letters!

‘Well done darling’ the girl’s mother replies. ‘That’s because you’re blonde.’
After returning from school the next day the girl tells her mother ‘I am the smartest student in my maths class! I can count up to 15! Everyone else stopped at about 5’
‘Well done’ replies the mother again. ‘That’s ...

At my school there’s a rapper named MC Squared

The science teacher just calls him E

What do dogs do after they finish obedience school?

“They get their masters.”

Middle school for me was like Charles Darwin…

Naturally, I wasn’t selected by anybody.

A young boy passes a brothel on his way home from school when

the lady of the house leans forward and waves her pinky finger at him. "Hi little boy", she laughs.

He asks her, "why do you wave like that?"

She holds up her pinky finger again, "well, that's how little 'it' is".

The next day the boy strolls by and the lady does the same. "...

They just put speed bumps outside the local school.

Well I hope it was a speed bump.

How can you tell the Head girl of a school?

She is the one with the muddy knees.

I never get school shooting jokes.

Maybe they're aimed at a younger audience.

My wife recently became a crossing guard at our sons school.

She hates when I ask how the child trafficking is going.

Did you hear about the kidnapping at the school?

It's ok, he woke up

Why can’t Michael Jackson go within 200m of a school?

Because he’s dead

Scott Morrison was visiting a Sydney primary school and the class was in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings.

The teacher asked Mr Morrison if he would like to lead the discussion on the word 'Tragedy'.

So our illustrious leader asked the class for an example of a 'Tragedy'

A little boy stood up and offered: 'If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing' in the field and a tractor runs o...

Did you know that all high school math teachers are lonely?

You can tell by them always asking you to find the X

A bright, young, fresh-out-of-school auditor just joined the IRS, excited to begin tracking down high-powered offenders--such as the Enron or WorldCom guys. Anxious for his first high-powered audit, he was a bit dismayed when his assignment was to audit a Rabbi.

*Looking over the books and taxes were pretty straight forward and the Rabbi clearly very frugal, so he thought he'd make his day interesting by having a little fun with the Rabbi. "Rabbi," he said, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles."*

*"Yes," answered the Rabbi.*

*"Well, Rabbi,...

Why are American schools alot like Fortnite?

You just hop off the bus and start shooting.

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Can your dick touch your ass?

A son walks into his fathers room to find him eating a bad of potato chips. He kindly asks his father if he could have some.

His father replies “well son, can your dick touch your ass?”

The boy seems puzzled and replies with a simple “no?” and his father explains they’re his and the bo...

A teacher at a religious school was trying to teach her students that violence is never the answer.

Teacher: "When do you think it's alright to use violence?"

*A little girl raises her hand.*

Teacher: "Yes, Sophie?"

Sophie: "When someone tries to take your stuff(?)"

Teacher: "No. If someone tries to take your belongings, try to talk to them or tell a superior. Anyone el...

The school called a woman and told her: "Your son has been telling lies"

"You're right", she replied, "I don't have any kids."

Some laws that we didn't learn at school

01. *LORENZ'S LAW OF MECHANICAL REPAIR*

Once your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

02. *ANTHONY'S LAW OF THE WORKSHOP*

Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

03. *KOVAC'S CONUNDRUM*

When u dial a wrong numbe...

You’re shown four kids, named Seven, Eight, Nine, and Eleven, and told that one of them is constantly bullied at school. Which one, and how do you know?

The answer is Nine, because they’re always the closest to the mean.

As an Aussie, Americans are always asking me where in Australia there *isn’t* something trying to kill you...

“School” is my answer

A retired man purchased a home near a high school. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace, then the new school year began...

...One afternoon early into the first semester, three loud young boys came down his street, beating merrily on every bin they came across. They then did so the following day and the day after that, until finally the retiree decided it was time to take some action.

The next afternoon, he walke...

Josey wasn't the best pupil at Sunday school

Josey wasn't the best pupil at Sunday school. She often fell asleep and one day while she was sleeping, the teacher asked her a question. "Who is the creator of the universe?" Joe was sitting next to Josey and decided to poke her with a pin to wake her up. Josey jumped and yelled, "God almighty!" Th...

Tom was not the brightest kid in his school.

None of his classmates liked him. He was plain stupid when it came to even simplest stuff. His teacher always told him "you're driving me crazy".

One day, Tom's mother visited school and when she spoke to teacher, the teacher directly said: "Your child is absolutely stupid, not only his grad...

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I was talking to my uncle about his high school years…

He said when he started high school he was the biggest trouble maker in the school. He cut classes, got in fights, smoked in the bathroom, etc etc. Said he spent half his freshmen year sitting outside the principal’s office.

Eventually he got expelled and his parents had no choice but to sen...

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There is a new teacher in a school, and she is sent to the worst class with the laziest and the most spoiled kids.

The new teacher starts introducing herself to the first-graders, asking some questions to them, hoping to get them to like her.

She decided to start the lesson in a fun way to get the children's attention. So she starts drawing some pictures on the whiteboard and asks the children what has s...

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic school for lunch.

At the head of the table was a large tray of hot dogs. The nun posted a sign on the hot dog tray, "Take only one. God is watching."

Further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. One child whispered to another, "Take all you want. God ...

Jimmy is in the school yard...

and goes over to his friend Billy and notices he has a brand new smart watch.

Jimmy: How did you get that?

Billy: well last night I walked into my parents room and caught them wrestling and my dad told me if I left and forgot what I saw he’d get me a watch.

Jimmy: Oh wow I’ve h...

Why Do You Never See Camels Going To School With Cows?

Because they don't want to put up with that drama dairy.

(My wife came up with this, don't hate me.)

Little Johnny learns additions in school.

Teacher: "Johnny, what is 3 plus 4?"

Johnny starts counting his finders: "One, two, three... four, five, six, seven. Seven Miss!"

Teacher: "Correct Johnny, but you need to learn doing additions without counting on your fingers. Put your hand in your pockets."

Johnny proceeds wit...

Dad I burnt the school down, am I in trouble?

"You arson."

If a class going to cosmetology school can’t make it because of a snow storm…

Do they have a make up day?

I have no idea how those quiet kids in school are doing now

I haven’t heard from them at all

A teacher's letter to a parent: "Dear Parent, Mark, your son, doesn't smell nice in school. Kindly encourage him to take his bath."

Parent replies: "Dear Teacher, Mark is not a rose flower. Don't smell him, just teach him! Thank you."

Why did the hospital send all the nurses to art school

So they could learn how to draw blood

What is a woman's favourite subject at school?

History. They are great at bringing up stuff from the past.

Two guys become best friends in high school, bonding over their similar tastes in music.

After a while, one guy notices that whenever his friend is in a relationship, all he listens to is Liz Phair songs. And whenever he’s single, he goes back to his normal genres.

After high school, the two enlist together. During their first tour, the guy notices his friend is once again seemi...

What's the difference between a School bus and a pineapple?

The little pricks are on the outside of the pineapple!

The nun teaching Sunday School was speaking to her class one morning and she asked the question: "When you die and go to Heaven... which part of your body goes first?"

Suzy raised her hand and said "I think it's your hands.” "Why do you think it's your hands, Suzy?" Suzy replied "Because when you pray, you hold your hands together in front of you and God just takes your hands first.” “What a wonderful answer!" the nun said.

Little Johnny raised his hand and...

Why do high school girls travel in threes?

Because they just can't even.

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First day at medical school..

It was the first day at medical school and all the students gathered around a corpse in a lab next to the professor.

The professor says, "There are two important lessons every person wanting to be a doctor should learn. The first lesson is that you should never feel disgusted about the human ...

why did atomic number 29 go to music school

because he was a conductor

How many grades does Dog School have?

K-9

A guy asks a girl to the school dance

A guy asks a girl to go to a dance. She agrees, and he decides to rent a suit. The rental has a long line, so he waits and waits, and finally he gets his suit.

He decides to buy flowers, so he goes to the flower shop. The flower shop has a long line, so he waits and waits, until he finally bu...

With school I just want an A

But with you I just want an F

My high school history teacher was a friggin liar!!!

She would say on a regular basis "history has a tendency to repeat it's self"

To this day I've never seen reruns of the news

Little Johnny went to school sick one

Coughing and sneezing the teacher approached him and said

“If you’re sick you should stay home we don’t want you to get the other children sick”


Johnny replied


“But you said I’d never be able to pass anything!”

How do you know when school has ended?

When the back-to-school sales start appearing.

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Little Timmy goes to a farm with his school

The farmer there was talking about how manure helps the plants by nourishing the soil. Timmy immediately asks the teacher to call his mother. When the teacher asked why, He said
"I heard mom saying she got a lot of shit on her hands right now".

Why did the m&m go to school

He wanted to become a smartie

[BREAKING NEWS] There’s been a kidnapping at Lakewood Elementary School today

It’s ok, he woke up.

A professor, a CEO, and a janitor are in a forest when they discover a magic fairy

The fairy says "I will give you what you most desire if you do someone else's job for a day."

The professor says "I'll be an elementary school teacher. What can be so hard about teaching a bunch of 6-year-olds how to read?" so he is teleported into a classroom. After a few minutes, all the ki...

I was rejected from my dream art school because I used the wrong pencil.

It wasn’t 2B.

One of my wife’s primary School’s student was wearing a Fitbit watch

One of my wife’s primary School’s student was wearing a Fitbit watch, which prompted my wife to ask, “Are you tracking your steps?” “No,” said the little girl. “I wear this for Mum so she can show Dad when he gets home.”

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There was an American wrestler from Texas named John, who throughout his high school career had never lost a match. As he went on into college he continued undefeated. He became a national icon and symbol of American strength.

News began to circulate of a Russian wrestler who was fierce and unstoppable. As each wrestlers legends grew, a match was set up between the two, America versus Russia. The match would be held in Texas.

John began training immediately. Every day his coach would tell him, “This Russ ...

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Son: Dad we have a small get-together at school tomorrow.

Dad: What do you mean by small?

Son: Just you, me, and the principal.

I recently found out that the Origami school in our community is about to close for good...

I'll update more on this as it unfolds.

I'm going to medical school to become a doctor, I've already done the hardest part that most people can't handle.

I got vaccinated and wear a mask

I recently told my Dad I was going back to school to major in the study of plants...

...He said, "Botony?"

I said, "Not yet, but when I get my degree I will be able to afford a bunch."

Little Susie came home from school and told her mum the boys kept asking her to do cartwheels

"you should tell them No, they only want to see your knickers" said her mum

"I know that, that's why I hide them in my bag"

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A young boy says to his father "Dad, our maths teacher is asking to see you."

"What happened?" The father asks.

"Well, she asked me, 'how much is 7 * 9?' I answered '63' , then she asked, 'and 9 * 7?' So I asked 'what's the fucking difference?'

"Indeed, what is the difference?" asks the father. ''Sure, I'll go.''

The next day, the boy comes home from sch...

A student was standing at the edge of the roof of his school and was about jump off and commit suicide.

Suddenly from the school grounds his physics teacher yells to him, "Don't jump, you've got lots of potential!"

A boy goes to his School Career Advisor to talk about what he should do after school.

The Advisor says to him, do you have any particular interests or talents? The boy says, I really love stamps, studying them, collecting them, everything about them. The Career Advisor shakes his head and says, I'm sorry to tell you this, but philately will get you nowhere.

Is it okay to start drinking when the kids get to school

or does that make me a bad teacher?

I was surprised when I discovered my roommate was stealing from driving school

But to be honest I should have seen all the signs

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One day in a school

the teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.  

Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad’s farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.”  

The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not ‘fa...

Three "facts" school taught me that turned out to be false

1. Pluto is a planet
2. You won't always have a calculator in your pocket
3. Girls don't like having their hair pulled

What happens when you lose you attention span in school

You gain your detention span

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Sex in high school is like big data

Everybody talks about it but nobody knows what it is

I couldn't come to school yesterday and appearantly there was a school shooting

I'm so lucky, I hate having my picture taken

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A high school principal made an announcement at an assembly.

He said, "Boys and girls, the faculty have witnessed an alarming increase in public displays of affection, which are against school policy. Effective immediately, we will start issuing fines to those caught doing this. A first offense will be $5. A second offense will be $10. A third offense will be...

What is the difference between the US Army and US schools?

They both get shot at but only the Army gets to shoot back

What’s the difference between a cactus and a school-bus?

With a school-bus, the little pricks are on the inside.

Why do African schools have no tests?

Many cheetahs, many of them are lion.

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my school held a seminar on holding orgasms.

nobody came.

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Mum: Er.. Sally, what are you doing with the cat, why are you putting it in your school bag?

Sally: I’m taking it to school because I heard dad tell you that when I go to school he is ‘going to eat that pussy’

So I took a programming elective in school

My final grade was C+

You know what they call the person who finishes last in medical school?

Doctor

A school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport

A school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, an ancient wooden device called a "slide-rule"  as well as a code device called an "abacus" that he claimed was a calculator....

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Not to brag, but I did a lot of experiments with sex and drugs when I was in high school.

Unfortunately I was part of the control group.

Four buddies caught up for coffee many years after high school. Each bragging to the other how successful and wealthy they’ve become.

The first guy said, “See that bank building across the street? I am going to buy it within the next six months.”

The second guy then said, “See that hotel building next to the bank? I am going to buy it within the next month.”

Not wanting to lose out, the third guy quickly said, “See t...

Remember in elementary school how they had those motivational posters?

"You'll miss 100% of the shots you don't take"

Now look at us, school shootings every week.

Thanks alot Michael Jordan.

Was cleaning out our attic today when I found a dusty old Rolling Stone Magazine. One of the articles was about the late great singer Sam Cooke and had a photo of his report card from school.

History ~ Incomplete

Biology ~ Incomplete

Science ~ Incomplete

French ~ Incomplete

School days...

Teacher: If income tax is 20% and your dad earns $50,000, how much tax does he pay?

Kid: $100

Teacher: Let's try again. If income tax is 30% and your dad earns $100000, how much does he pay?

Kid: $100

Teacher: Alright, last try. If income tax is %50 and your dad earns $10...

A high-school girls soccer team hires a new coach, Coach Bill. When Coach Bill is hired the girls are in last place.

Coach Bill starts a whole new regimen for practices, including new workouts, new drills and after 2 weeks of this he introduces a new herbal supplement he asks the girls to start taking daily.

A week later the girls win their first game of the season. Then another one, and another one... In f...

At school one day, a bully told me I had a face only a mother could love.

I went home and found out I was adopted.

Get a job

A young man in a small town graduates from high school. His father comes to him that evening and tells him “Son, you’re a man now. You need to start contributing to this household. Go get a job.”

The young man is rightfully concerned. Work prospects in his town are slim. The only jobs availab...

Little Johnny is on recess playing on the playground when he see his dad drive into the woods next to the school.

Curious as to what his dad's doing, little Johnny decided to skip school to see what was going on.

When he gets to the woods he finds his dad there with his aunt Jenny. Well aunt Jenny is on her knees helping Johnny's dad relieve himself.

After school little Johnny runs home to tell ...

When does a pirate finish pirate school?

At the end of the yar

Placing three armed veterans in each school will stop school shootings

The shooter will see people with three arms and freak out.

Why Don't Communists Like School?

Because they have always get bad Marx.

I was dismayed this afternoon when my wife told me my 6 year old son wasn't actually mine.

She then said I need to pay more attention at school pick up.

A farm boy arrives late for school one day.

"Why are you late?" asks the teacher.

"I had to take the bull down to the field to mate with the cow," explains the boy.

"Couldn't your dad have done that?" asks the teacher.

"He could have," replies the boy. "But I think the bull did a better job than he would have done."

"I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor's office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30 am. I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45 am.

The trip to his office took about 35 minutes, so I didn't have any time to spare.

As most women do, I like to take a little extra effort over hygiene when making such visits, but this time I wasn't going to be able to make the full effort. So, I rushed upstairs, threw off my pajamas, wet the ...

Little Johnny took a leak with his classmate in the school loo.

His classmate noticed that after peeing, Johnny didn't wash his hands. He then proceeded to ask:

"Johnny, why do you not wash your hands after peeing?"

"Is there a need to do so?"

"Yes! My mum taught me to wash after peeing, to wash off pee in my hands."

"Well, I ...

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Catholic school is like a game of chess.

You don’t want to end up with the bishop in your ass.

What’s yellow and comes in the morning to brighten every parent’s day?

The school bus.

"Mommy, mommy! Suzy at school was showing the boys her knickers for a penny."

*Oh my goodness, my son. What did you do?*

"I came straight home, of course!"

*That's my good boy.*

"Mom?"

*Yes, my son?*

"May I please have a penny?"

Psychology is key

When the children passed an old house on their way home from school, they were always rubbing their sticks on the balcony railing and enjoying the sound. The older owner, who had been bothered by the noise for a long time, had a really good idea instead of scolding the kids.

He called the chi...

After hearing the story of Jonah at Sunday School, a little girl repeated the story at school on Monday.

Her teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because, even though it is a very large mammal, its throat is very small.

The little girl said, "But how can that be? Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not sw...

I learned how to meditate from my school teacher. She would say to me...

..."SHUT UP, STAY STILL AND JUST BE QUIET!!!

Why was the Lemon sent to detention after school.

It was always tarty.

I asked out my crush in school today

Now I gotta look for a new job

I watched a movie called "The Adjustment," about a Chiropractor who quits, goes back to school and becomes an famous Orthopedic Spine Surgeon. I didn't really like it.

Too much backstory.

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A group of primary school kids, accompanied by two female teachers, went on a field trip to Randwick races to see and learn about thoroughbred horses.

When it was time to take the children to the toilet, it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other.
The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the men's toilet when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the uri...

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A teacher asked a first grader, why he brought a cat to school?!

He said:”It’s my moms cat, I saved it’s life!”

“How is that?”asked the teacher

“I overheard daddy tell mommy he’s going to eat her pussy after me and my sister leave for school!”

I asked my daughter if she’d seen my newspaper. She told me that newspapers are old school. She said that people use tablets nowadays and handed me her iPad.

That fly didn’t stand a chance.

Alice was leaving school when a boy from her class bet her $5 that she couldn’t climb up the school’s flagpole

She did, slid down, collected her $5 and went home.
When she walked into the kitchen to tell her mom, her mom said “Oh, sweetie. He just wanted to look up your skirt and see your panties.”

The following day, the same boy bet her $10 that she couldn’t do it faster than she did the da...

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An elementary school teacher was handing out samples of deer jerky to anyone who wanted to try it.

It was part of the lesson about pioneer days and she hadn't yet told them what kind of meat it was.


She was giving clues to help the students. "I'm sure all of you have seen one as there are a lot of them around here". No response.

"The males often clash to prove who is toughest". ...

I asked a girl from my school out for a date; she only responded with a comment about our classes schedules

something about not having Chemistry together

Little Johnny is in school and they have show and tell.

The teacher asks the class to tell about something that happened in their family recently. When it is Johnny's turn. he walks to the board and draws two periods ". ." The teacher asks him to explain. He says"My sister missed these and my parents are real upset."

I failed math so many times in school

I can't even count.

What school of magic does a Giraffe practice?

Neckromancy

One day while returning from school a 8 year old child ...

One day while returning from school a 8 year old child met a Saint and had a conversation with him.

The Saint became so happy with the child that he gave him a magic sentence which will fulfill all his wishes.

"I know everything"

However, he warned him to not use the Sentence m...

One day, Johnny comes home from school and asks his mother, "Mommy, how was I born?"

"The stork brought you here," says the mother.

"And how were my brother Joel and my sister Emily born?"

"The stork brought them, too."

"And how were you born?"

"The stork also brought me."

"Did the stork also bring Uncle George and Aunt Ruth and Cousin Evan and Cou...

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Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son. "Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!"

"But why, Mom? I don't want to go." 
"Give me two reasons why you don't want to go." 
"Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!" 
"Oh, that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready." 
"Give me two reasons why I should go to school." 
"...

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The case of the missing condoms

A girl I was friends with in high school called me crying today. She had a question she needed to ask a guy friend. She said her boyfriend had just bought a box of a dozen condoms and now there are only six left, but they only had sex three times. When confronted her boyfriend said that sometimes...

Youbg boy tells mum "I saw daddy..."

"....in the nearby park, he was parked and with a woman, I went up to the car as the windows were steamed up, I saw they were busy and they were naked and he was doing press ups like we do at school, but he was on top of the naked woman "

Mum is super mad, she quizzes the boy and with growing...

When Kermit the Frogs entertainment career came to an end, he enrolled in seminary school where he was ordained

Now he's a Pastor of Muppets

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What does a brothel and the American school system have in common?

The workers are under paid, the building probably isn’t up to code and you’re likely to leave thoroughly fucked.

An engineer accidentally gave a medical school exam. See his answers:

1. Antibody - One who hates his body .

2. Artery - Study of Fine Paintings or military, not sure.

3. Bacteria - Back door of a Cafeteria .

4. Coma - Punctuation Mark .

5. Gall Bladder - Bladder of a Girl .

6. Genes - Blue Denim.

7. Labour Pain - Hurt at Work...

In school, you learn about spies

In soviet Russia, spies learn about you!

Two Dutch girls

Two Dutch girls are riding their bicycles home from school one day. The first one says "I've never come this way before." And the other says "it's the cobblestones. "

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I am trying to remember a very long joke my high school physics teacher told me.

First off I know there’s TOMT for things like this, however since this is a joke I figure it gets pretty hard to track these sorts of things down. I remember the jist and punchline of this joke, however I also remember it having a very long and intricate setup, so long I remember getting pretty bore...

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My high school was so small..

we had Driver’s Ed and Sex Ed in the same car!

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