My bullies broke my MP3-Player at school. Luckily, my parents bought me an MP4 for my birthday, but these idiots destroyed it again.

Tomorrow, I'll bring an MP5.

I never understood school shooting jokes

I guess they're aimed at a younger audience...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

The teacher asked Jimmy, "Why is your cat at school today Jimmy?"

Jimmy replied (crying), "Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, 'Ima eat that pussy once Jimmy leaves for school today!'"

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

My son was thrown out of school today for letting a girl in his class wank him off..

I said : son, that’s the fourth school this year.


Maybe teaching in an elementary school isnt for you

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

My school had a assembly about preventing orgasms.

Nobody came

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

My son was sent home from school for swearing today.

I said, "what did you say?"

"The 'C' word."

I said "It wasn't clever, was it?"

He said, "no it was cunt."

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A train ploughs into the side of a catholic girls school bus.

A train ploughs into the side of a Catholic girls school bus, killing them all. At the gates of heaven, st Peter asks the girls "have any of you ever touched a penis?"

The first girl, Paula, shyly says "I once touched the head of a penis with the tip of my finger." St Peter says "Okay, dip y...

Two teenagers, Fred and Joe, meet after school.

Fred is all excited: “Man, I was at the most awesome party this weekend! We went to this dude’s house and guy had toilets made of pure gold!”

“No way!”

“Yes way,” insists Fred, “come with me and check it out for yourself if you don’t believe me.”

Twenty minutes later they’re rin...

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch.

At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: “Take only ONE . God is watching.”
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, “Take all you w...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A boy comes home from school and tells his father that his homework is to learn the difference between theory and reality...

The father says ‘son, that’s easy. I’ll give you an example. Go into the kitchen and ask your mother if she would sleep with the plumber for a million dollars’.


After a short while the son comes back from the kitchen and says ‘father, I have spoken with mother and she said she would sleep...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A freshman is talking to the new girl in school.

“You’ll like it here,” he tells her. “Everyone is pretty chill, the teachers are all nice, but the principal is kind of a moron.”

​

“Do you know who I am?” the girl asks her new classmate. “I’m the daughter of the principal.”

​

The boy is silent and ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Yesterday my school held a seminar on how to orgasm

Nobody came

There was a kidnapping at my school once.

A teacher had to wake him up.

So I brought a P30 to school, and kids made fun of me for it not being an Apple product

I told my mom and she said "Its ok son, we will upgrade you to a P80 so you do not get made fun off"

I then P80 to school, yet they still made fun of me for it not being an Apple product.

But they won't make fun of me when I bring my P90...

A mother is cooking dinner when she hears her son come back from school...

"How was you English test today?" She asked

"It was easy except I had trouble on this one difficult question"

"What did it ask?" The mother replied

"It asked for the past tense of think"

"What did you answer it as?" The mother says.

"I couldn't really figure it out...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A little boy and his friends are being called bastards and bitches by bullies at school.

The boy goes home and asks, "Dad, what are bastards and bitches?" And his dad replies, "Bitches are ladies and bastards are gentlemen." Then the boy goes upstairs to see his mom. As he enters the room, he accidentally drops a perfume bottle, and his mom says, "Shit!" "Mom, what is shit?" and she say...

Police officer: "I'm here to inform you that your son burned down the school"

Parents: "arson?"


Police officer: "yes, your son"

There was a kidnapping at school today

It’s ok, he woke up.

An autistic child first time going to school

So first time posting here. It is my favorite joke and I have never seen it posted. It is better with some gesture and noise but I'll try anyway, I'll do my best to translate it in English. (sorry if my English isn't perfect but I have to share this masterpiece)


A mother tell her autisti...

A Sunday school teacher asked her class to learn one fact about Jesus by the following Sunday. The following week she asked each of them what they had found.

Susie said, “He was placed in a manger.”

Bobby said, “He threw money changers out of the temple.”

Little Johnny said, “He has a pick-up truck but doesn’t know how to drive it.”

Curious, the teacher asked, “And where did you find that?”

“From my daddy.” He replied. “Yester...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

WHY PEOPLE HATE SCHOOL RE-UNIONS

Jan, Sue and Mary haven't seen each other since leaving school.

They rediscover each other via a reunion website and arrange to meet for lunch in a wine bar.

Jan arrives first, wearing a beige Versace. She orders a bottle of Pinot Grigio.

Sue arrives shortly afterward, in grey...

Little Johny comes in to school one morning wearing a brand new watch...

His best friend, little Tommy, wants to know where the watch is from, so Johnny tells his story: “I was coming from the bathroom to my bedroom when I heard a strange noise from my parent’s bedroom. I walked in and saw them bouncing up and down. Dad said I could have anything I wanted as long as I di...

In school, everyone laughed at Amy Schumer when she said she wanted to be a comedian.

But no ones laughing now.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

You're like school on a Saturday . . .

. . . no class.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Professor welcomes the class in Anatomy lab on the first day of medical school.

He begins by saying - You need 2 rules to become a successful doctor.

No 1 - you cannot feel disgusted by anything.

After saying that, he stuck his finger into the cadaver's butt hole.

Students look at him in a shocked manner, but eventually they give in and remembering his r...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Why condoms come in packs of 3, 6 and 12!

A man walks into the pharmacy with his 8-year old son.

They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, "What are these, Dad?"

To which the man matter-of-factly replies, "Those are called Condoms son. Men use them to have safe sex."

"Oh I see," replied the boy pensi...

What is the difference between a porcupine and high school?

On the porcupine the pricks are on the outside!

What does a homeschooler call a school shooting?

Homicide.

I got a phone call from my son's school today

Hello, is that Mr Jenkins?

Yes, how can I help you?

Hi, This is little Billy’s music teacher calling

Oh, hi

Yeah, hi. I just wanted to let you know it looks like you have a little Elvis Presley on your hands!

Really? Wow! That’s..

Yeah, we just found him dea...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A teen moves to a new school

A teen moves to a new school, only to learn it has a very similar social structure. There's only one group that he can't figure out. It's made up of a cheerleader, a goth girl, and a thot.

He finds a group he gets along with pretty well and asks one of his new classmates about them.

Th...

Why did the girl invite the mushroom to the school dance?

Because he was a Fun-gi

Why can't you see an anti-vaxx kid going high school?

Because they're dead.

Little Billy came home from school...

Little Billy came home from school to see the families pet rooster dead in the front yard. Rigor mortis had set in and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air. When his Dad came home Billy said, "Dad our roosters dead and his legs are sticking in the air. Why are his legs sticking in the ai...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A young boy says to his father "Dad, our maths teacher is asking to see you."

"What happened?" The father asks.

"Well, she asked me, 'how much is 7 * 9?' I answered '63' , then she asked, 'and 9 * 7?' So I asked 'what's the fucking difference?'

"Indeed, what is the difference?" asks the father. ''Sure, I'll go.''

The next day, the boy comes home from sch...

How are high school teachers similar to anti-vaxx mothers?

They have to say goodbye to their kids after only 4 years.

How do you sneak into a school for ghosts?

Just act super natural.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A Rabbi and a priest run out of a burning school...

The priest said to the Rabbi, "what about the children?"

"Fuck the children" said the Rabbi

"do you think we will have time?"

Trump is at an elementary school assembly and asks,...

"Does anyone know what a tragedy is?"

A kindergartener raises her hand and the president chooses her to answer, "A car crash."

"No, not quite." Responds Trump, "that would be an 'accident' ".

He then chooses a 4th grade boy. "If a school bus went off a cliff and all the kids die...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Little Johnny comes home from school one day...

and he says to his mother, "I had sex with a teacher today."

His mother is mortified and replies, "I think you had better tell your father and see what he has to say about that!"

So Johnny goes into the other room and says "Dad, I had sex with a teacher today."

"Well good for yo...

Congratulations USA

Zero school shootings so far this year.

We were about to observe our first autopsy in medical school, and my friend asked me, “What do you think it’ll be like?”

I said, “Remains to be seen.”

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A boy is at school, and they start the day by telling riddles

The boy says: it goes in, it goes out! The teacher becomes red and angry. Get out! The teacher said. So the boy goes onto the hallway. There he meets the principle, who asks him what he is doing there. I got send out of class, because I asked: it goes in, it goes out! The principal get angry, and sa...

Back when I was in high school, I worked at a grocery store as a stockboy.

One of the "long time fixtures" there was a homeless guy who would sit outside and ask for change. He was there every day, from opening of the store until closing, without fail.

Several months after I started, the owner decided to go in a new direction with the store and wanted to increase wo...

I was in a school shooting

So glad I was because now I'm vaccinated

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

My first high-school football game was a lot like my first time having sex...

I was bloody and sore, but at least my dad came.

TIL that a school of piranhas can strip all the flesh off of a child's body in less than a minute...

Unfortunately, I lost my job at the aquarium.

[OC] Why did the guy take machining classes at the all female trade school?

He wanted to get lathed.

A former Sergeant in the Marine Corps took a new job as a high school teacher.

Just before the school year started, he injured his
back.
He was required to wear a plaster cast around the upper
part of his body. Fortunately, the cast fit under his shirt and
wasn't noticeable.
On the first day of class, he found himself assigned to
the toughest students i...

I've just finished writing a script for a film I titled "American Schools"

Shooting starts soon.

Why are school lunches so much better in Kentucky?

Ours are thoroughbred.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I was walking home from school when 2 thugs came and started beating the shit out of me. Suddenly, my brother shows up to help out.

Now I can't fight all three of them.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A teenage girl come home from school and asks her mother a question

"Is it true what Rita just told me?" "What's that?" asks her mother. "That babies come out of the same place where boys put their penises?" said her daughter. "Yes it is dear!" replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and that she wouldn't have to explain it to her daughter. ...

I bumped into an old school friend today.

He started showing off, talking about his well paid job and expensive sports car. Then he pulled out a photo of his wife and said, "She's beautiful, isn't she?" I said, "If you think she's gorgeous, you should see my girlfriend." He said, "Why? Is she a stunner?" I said, "No, she's a optician.

Watching this weird High School Musical sequel on Netflix

Zac Efron becomes a serial killer.

I'm Aussie and Americans are always asking me where in Australia there isn’t something trying to kill you...

School is my answer!

Two young boys are talking before school.

“My uncle ran for Senate last year,” the first boy says to his classmate.

​

“Really?” the second boy asks. “What does he do now?”

​

“Nothing,” the first boy explains. “He got elected.”

Joke I heard from a 15 year old in high school. (He has some learning disabilities and was completely serious about this joke being funny)

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Cheese-it.

Cheese-it who?

Cheese outta here!

He then proceeds to giggle.

At school, a teacher is teaching little kids Mathematics.

At school, a teacher is teaching little kids Mathematics. She says: "Does anybody of you already know how to count? For example you, what's your name?"
"My name is George Lucas. Yes, I know how to count."
"Please show me."
"Four, five, six, one two, three."

Paedophiles should be allowed to live near schools...

It reduces their carbon footprint

In an elementary school English class, kids are learning the word “contagious”. Teacher calls on students, asking them to use it in a sentence.

- “Susan?”

- “I had a flu and mommy made me stay home for 3 days because I was contagious!”

- “Very good. What about you, Johnny?”

- “Our neighbor Mrs. Henderson has started painting her fence last night, daddy says it’s gonna take the contagious!”

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A high school is having a talent show.

The first act is a girl trying to tie a knot with a cherry stem in her mouth. She tries and tries, but she just cant do it.

A guy from the audience yells out, "Hey, maybe you should practice with my dick!" Most of the audience laughs.

The girl requests a microphone and a nearby teacher...

I saw two high school boys go into a bathroom stall together

before juuling, that would have meant something entirely different

A toddler comes home from Catholic school

She asks her dad “dad, they said God made everybody, is that true?”

Her dad says “Yes that is true.”

She asks “So God made you?”

Her dad says “Yes, God made me.”

Puzzled, she asks “and God made me?”

Her dad replies “Yes, he made you... why?”

She then replies...

Billy's father picked him up from school.

He was anxious to find out about Billy's tryout for the school play.

Billy told him, "Dad, I got a part! I play a man who's been married for twenty years."

"That's great, son," said his dad. "Keep up the good work and before you know it they'll give you a speaking part."

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A Syrian kid in France.

A Syrian kid and his refugee family move to France. On his first day of school his teacher asks him "what is your name?". To which he politely responds, "My name is Abdul and I am from Syria (Middle-East accent)..She abruptly stops him and corrects him.
"No! From now on you are French and your n...

My first original joke, from elementary school days: What do flies drink?

Fly swatter.

Sunday School

Josey wasn't the best pupil at Sunday school. She often fell asleep and one day while she was sleeping, the teacher asked her a question. "Who is the creator of the universe?"
Adam was sitting next to Josey and decided to poke her with a pin to wake her up.
Josey jumped and yelled, "God almi...

You know what you call the stupidest graduate from the worst medical school in the country?

Doctor.

How do American school kids learn the metric system?

9 millimeters at a time

How do you determine the amount of entitled parents that a school has?

Subtract the school's vaccination rate from 1.

A husband and wife are sitting at a table at her twentieth high-school reunion.

There is an incredibly drunk man slumped over at the table across from them.

​

“Do you know that guy?” the husband asks.

​

“Yes,” the wife replies somberly. “That’s my ex-boyfriend. He started drinking right after we broke up and hasn’t been sober si...

My hot ex from high school messaged me saying she’ll be in town for a day, but it just so happens to be on my fathers birthday.

So now I have to choose between the person I lost my virginity to, or my ex-girlfriend.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I was a big metal fan back in high school.

Back in high school I was a big metal fan.

At the beginning of the summer holidays I was at this awesome house party.

It was just high school kids in the house so we were able to turn the volume way up and had a pretty awesome playlist: Metallica, Black Sabbath, Judas Priest, Iron Mai...

One of my favorite memories from high school was being an underclassmen and beating up seniors...

I really miss those summers volunteering at the old folks home

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

If you go to scrapbooking school...

Do you get a collage degree?

Two school girls are arguing, one preppy the other nerdy

The preppy girl says, “you’re just jealous because I’m a 10 and you’re not!”
The nerdy girl responds, “Yeah you’re a 10! On the pH scale, because you’re so BASIC!”

Choir School

Do you know why choir school is hiring?

The only thing in school I ever was good at was nap time in Kindergarden...

...I got straight Z's.

I was feeling really depressed at school and thought I should try hanging myself in the corridor.

I ended up suspended.

Back in school, I took an apple tart to Detroit, Flint, and St Louis

My teacher had asked me to take pi to three dismal places

Colonoscopies were the most interesting thing I learned in med school.

They were right up my alley.

What is the best Donald Trump joke you've heard?

Don’t know if this one is in here yet, but here goes:

Trump is visiting a class in an elementary school where they are talking about words and meanings. The teacher asks Trump if he would like to lead the class in a discussion of the word “tragedy”. (No, not the punch line yet)

So he a...

A kid is late for school one day. “I had to take the bull down to mate with the heifer,” he explains to the teacher.

“Well, couldn’t your father have done that?” the teacher asks after class.

​

“Sure,” the boy replies. “But the bull would have done a better job.”

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

So a son asks his dad if he could drive him to school.

“Son” the father replies all condescending and such, “when Abraham Lincoln was your age, he walked miles and miles to school”

“Well dad, when Abraham Lincoln was your age, he was the president of the United States

“Well son, guess what was up with Abes kid”

“What?”

*cocks...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

[long] John McClane and Hans Gruber sat next to each other in Spanish class as kids at Nakatomi Plaza Junior High School...

One day the *Profesora* said, "we're going to have a vocab quiz, but we're going to do it as a game, make a competition out of it. I'm going to say a word in English, and you and the person sitting next to you compete to see who can give me the Spanish equivalent faster." She turned to the first pai...

What did the Buffalo dad say when dropping off his son at school?

Bison

I've always wanted to be a train engineer. I spent 15 years in engineering school, 10 years learning about train history, and 5 years learning how to operate a train.

I really thought I would've been trained by now.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

How did the Japanese solider fail out of military school?

He brought a parachute to class.

A professor, a CEO, and a janitor are in a forest when they discover a magic fairy.

The fairy says "I will give you what you most desire if you do someone else's job for a day."

The professor says "I'll be an elementary school teacher. What can be so hard about teaching a bunch of 6-year-olds how to read?" so he is teleported into a classroom. After a few minutes, all the ki...

What sort of grades did Tommy Wiseau receive in school?

Oh, high marks.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Back in high school, I was really bad in science. (OC)

I even failed sexual chemistry.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Rosy and Sunday school

Rosy goes to Sunday school every week, but falls asleep every class!

One day, to “inadvertently” call her out on it, the teacher calls on Rosy and asks this question:

“Who created the universe as we know it to be?”

At this point, to just have a laugh, Rosy’s friend, Adam, sittin...

The cross-eyed teacher at school got fired today.

He couldn't control his pupils.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

April and Sunday School

I’m not sure if this is original, but my buddy texted me it.
Little April was not the best student in Sunday school.
Usually she slep...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A polar bear cub comes home from school one day and says to his mother...

“Mom, are you sure I'm a purebred polar bear? I'm not part grizzly bear or anything?"

She says, "Of course you're 100% polar bear. I'm a polar bear, your dad's a polar bear, you're a polar bear."

The next day after school, he asks his father. "Dad, am I a purebred polar bear? Are you s...

High School Virgin

Son to mother: "Mom, all the kids in the school are making fun of me because I am still a virgin."

Mother: "Well, start giving them bad grades and they will stop."

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Why don't they teach sex education and driver's education on the same day in Iraqi schools?

It's too hard on the camel.

Why do fish do bad in school?

They are below the C level

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A class of children return to school after Christmas.

The teacher asks each child in turn to tell her what gifts they received. Little Paul replies "I got a choo-choo" "Now Paul," replies the teacher, " you're in the big school now, we call it a train not a choo-choo"

She turns to Tommy. "what did you get?" "A nee-naw", replies Tommy. "Now Tommy...

What would happen if we took all possible school shooters and put them in one school?

Literally Fortnite

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

One great moment in school.

Boy: The principal is so dumb!


Girl: Do you know who I am?


Boy: No...


Girl: I am the principal's daughter!


Boy: Do you know who I am?


Girl: No...


Boy: Good! \*Walks away\*

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Time to go to school

Mom: Time to wake up and go to school!

Son: No, I don’t wanna go to school today!

Mom: But you have to go to school.

Son: But, I don’t wanna go to school.

Mom: Give me three good reasons why you should stay home, and I will give you three reasons why you need to go to sch...

What do you call a rock that never goes to school?

A skipping stone

What do you call an elementary school dropout?

An anti-vax child.

Two high school graduates are discussing their future college plans. The first says "I'm planning on going into farming, it's what my father did and it makes good money." The second asks "What type of farming? Wheat, corn, livestock?"

"I don't know man, there are so many fields to choose from."

I heard on the news that some med school dropouts end up practicing proctology illegally.

It's certainly frowned upon, but inevitably some unqualified professionals end up slipping through the cracks.

What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?

Spelling!

I was a very chilled back person in high school.

I would wear headphones around my neck and a fedora because I thought it made me look cool

Turns out it didn't and my friend told me that he only ate lunch with me because he feared that I would become one of those school shooter kids and he wanted to live.

What's the difference between School and Politics?

School is actually useful.

The school hired me as a photographer

So I was hired to photograph a school event and when I walked up to the doors these security guys stared me down and asked what I was doing

I started to reach for my camera and said I was the school shooter

And the douchebags jumped on me and cuffed me!

(True story, for what it’s worth) My neighbour has a new Spanish teacher at school, his name is Mr Armada.

“Like the Spanish Armada?” I asked.

“Yeah,” he said and I shook my head in disbelief.

“Well,” I sighed. “At least he isn’t called Mr Inquisition. Nobody would have expected that.”

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A fathers child just came home from school, his dad said “what did you learn today?” The son replied “We learned two words hypothetically and realistically but I’m not sure what they mean.” He said “go ask your mom and sister if they would sleep with a man for a million dollars.” They both said yes.

His Father said, “Hypothetically we have two million dollars, realistically we live with 2 whores.“

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A boy comes home after school one day.

His mother notices that he’s got a big smile on his face.
She asks, “Did anything special happen at school today?”
“Yes, Mom. I had sex with my English teacher!”
The mother is stunned. “You’re going to talk about this with your father when he gets home.”


Well, when dad comes home...

The only time kids are shot in school in Canada is..

Picture day

A husband and his wife were sitting at a table at her 20th high school reunion

She kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink, as he sat alone at a nearby table.

The husband asks: “do you know him?”

“Yes”, she sighed. “He’s my old boyfriend. I understand he started drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and i hear he hasn’t been sober since....

I wasn’t cut out for skydiving school

So I dropped out

Did you hear about the boy who turned up to school with only 1 glove?

He said the weather man said it's going to be cold, but on the other hand it might be warm.

Late for school

Teacher: Why are you late?
Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill.
Teacher: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it?
Student: No. I was standing on it.

School Projects are fun

A science teacher sent off his year 8 class with a homework task, come up witch a science experiment, and either film it to show to the class, or show the experiment in front of the class next week.

Tim went home and thought long and hard about what he would do, but he came in next week with ...

What’s the difference between high school and the friend zone?

I have a chance of making it out of high school.

I was at my school disco..

Walking across the hall to get a drink. One of my classmates came up to me and said ‘dude, your shoes are on smoking hot!’

I gave them a smile and kept walking to get a drink. Another classmate then approached me and said ‘hey bro, you’re on fire tonight!’

I gave them a wink and some ...

I banged my school teacher

With my car , she was annoying.

What grades did Nicholas Cage get in school?

The Bs! Not the Bs!

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Sunday School Suzy

There was once a girl named Suzy. She went to Sunday school at her local church every week. Her parents were lenient so she slept through most of the days. One day while Suzy was asleep she was called on by the teacher. The teacher asked “Suzy, what is the name of our lord and saviour?”. Suzy didn’t...

What did I donate for my son to get into med school?

My son.

A classmate dressed up as a storm trooper for Halloween and shot up the school

Don’t worry, no one got hurt.

A school shooting breaks out, the shooter kills every kid he sees for being cruel to him, all except one specific 12 year old boy.

I guess progeria has it’s ups.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Today i saw a kid getting beaten up at school by 4 bullys so i decided to take a step

This fucker got no chance versus 5 of us

What do Anti-Vax kids play in school?

Marco Polio

A girl is dared by a boy to climb the school flagpole.

She bets him five dollars that she can and he agrees. She climbs all the way to the top and gets her five bucks.

She tells her mom after school, feeling proud of her accomplishment.

“Oh honey, he just wanted you to climb the pole so he could see your underwear.” She says, shaking her h...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Two men start talking at a high school reunion.

“It’s been a long time, what have you been up to?”

“I’m a business man now, I run a very successful company”

“Ah, I can see that by the briefcase and suit”

“What do you do?”

“Oh, arrr, I’m a pirate.”

“Ah, I see that by your peg leg, hook and eye patch. How did you ...

An elderly RAF veteran was giving a talk at an all girls school...

He was called in to give a motivational talk about British moral during the war, and was trying to explain what a typical mission would be like.

"So there I was, escorting the bombers to their target, when out of the blue, we became surround by a pack of these Fokkers. I had two Fokkers in ei...

The first day of school, I signed up for Math, English, Science and Geography..

The rest, as they say, is History

School is just like my credit card

0% interest for the first 9 months.