UPJOKE
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A man was congratulating his son and daughter

“Hey Dad! I did it! I was just promoted!”

“Congratulations son! I knew you could do it! You’re so smart and you worked so hard!”



“Hey Dad, I also just got promoted!”

“Congratulations daughter, I knew you could do it! You’re so beautiful!”

“I…what…? But I…worked h...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If you're questioning your ...

You probably aren't thinking straight.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When my wife was pregnant, everybody caressed her belly, congratulating her.

But nobody fondled my balls and said: "good job!"

People keep congratulating me on my wife getting pregnant again...

Now only if I could find the guy that did it.

A friend sent me a card congratulating me for doing Veganuary.

Thanks, tastiest thing I've eaten so far.
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