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Circles Jokes

Why do good programmers never put circles into their games?

Because no one likes pointless features.

A Circle was talking to his other circle friends, he said did you know that our buddy circle hooked up with that lady circle? And circles asked...

Venn?

Mommy Mommy, I'm tired of walking in circles

Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the floor.

Did you hear about the Welsh baseball referee who circles the world each day?

The sun never sets on the British umpire.

What do you call a boat driving in circles for a student's education?

An In-Turn Ship!

The other day I had was in a heated debate about circles

It was a pointless argument.

2 squares and 2 circles

2 squares were in an argument and 2 circles were in an argument.

The squares were arguing over who was hotter, even though they were both 90 degrees.

The 2 circles argue all the time so the argument was pretty pointless.

(Thought of this in the shower. It’s a little cheesy)

Why are circles round?

They're to cool to be square..

I was lost in the woods and I found a dead hooker..

At that moment I knew I'd been walking in circles.

Why do people walk in circles and not in squares?

Because they are cutting corners.

My life is going in circles and circles...

Apparently, I am watching it from every angle.

Why are farmers so good at drawing circles?

Because the are Protractors

Thots are like circles.

Curvy, but pointless.

PSA: the term “Hipsters” is politically incorrect and is considered an offensive slur in many circles

Please use the medically-recommended term “conjoined twins” instead.

A lot of people think Crop Circles are done by alien aircrafts...

I think they're done by Cereal Killers.

Went to a restaurant that had circles 6 feet apart.

They only served people in the loop.

Why do circles always feel depressed?

Because their entire existence is pointless.

Why did the shark keep swimming in circles?

It had a nosebleed.

Why does America keep going in circles

Because they're all about their rights

Why Kim Jong-un has dark circles under eyes?

Because the enemy never sleeps!

Circles.

I don't see the point in them.

I don’t like jokes about circles

They have no point

Sometimes I walk in circles...

But it's just to get around.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two young guys appear in court after being arrested for smoking dope.

The judge says, "You seem like nice young men, and I'd like to give you a second chance instead of jail time.
I want you to go out this weekend and try to convince others of the evils of drug use.
I'll see you back in court Monday.

"On Monday, the judge asks the first guy, "How did you ...

Why do dogs run in circles?

It’s too hard to run in squares

There are 9 circles of Hell.

And if you think that's bad, there are 130 roundabouts of Milton Keynes.

Why doesn’t a world of circles exist?

Because it would be pointless

My uncle is a bus driver that circles Big Ben in London ...

he works around the clock.

What do you do when you see a baby spinning in circles?

Stop laughing and untie him from the ceiling fan

Why are circles always peaceful?

They don't have a side to pick.

Why did the blonde remove the lense from her eye and draw circles around it for hours?

She was practicing before her interview to be a contact tracer.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A young shark asked his dad, "Why do we always swim circles around people before eating them?"

He replied, "They taste better if you scare the shit out of them first"

What makes crop circles?

A protractor.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A black piece of asphalt walks into a bar

A black piece of asphalt walks into a bar and slams his fist down on the bar loudly proclaiming, "I demand a free drink because I'm the toughest motherfucker in here!" The barman, not wanting any trouble, hands the piece of asphalt a beer.

About 20 minutes pass when another piece of asphalt w...

I don't see why everyone likes circles so much

They're so pointless.

I got the death sentence for making a fence out of large circles.

It was a capital 'O' fence.

What do you call Blackbeard’s average for counting circles?

His Pi-rate.

Village Idiot

One of the best marksmen in the FBI was passing through a small town. Everywhere he saw evidences of the most amazing shooting. On trees, on walls, and on fences there were numerous bull's-eyes with the bullet hole in dead center. The FBI man asked one of the townsmen if he could meet the person res...

I took a detour on the way home yesterday. Took me through 8 traffic circles,

but it got me where I was going, in a roundabout way.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was lost in a forest, trying to find my way out using a compass.

After 2 hours, I realized I was going in circles.

After 3 hours, I realized I was using the wrong type of compass...

What do you call Bob Ross spinning around in circles at a theatre play?

Aphrodisiac

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Amish joke.

An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again.
The boy asked his father, "What is this father?" The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, "Son, ...

We practiced drawing circles in art class today

It was completely pointless

What did the Canadian say to the other Canadian when they saw a guy in a giant pink bathtub sailing around in circles in the middle of Lake Ontario?

"What's that, a boat?"

What do you call a man who illegally downloaded a documentary about circles?

A *πrate*

50 dollars is 50 dollars

Every year for 45 years James and Lucille had gone to the state Fair. Every yearJames told Lucille he wanted to go on the helicopter flight. "Its only 50 dollars" he would say. Every year Lucille would say "50 dollars is fifty dollars" and that was the end of the discussion.

On their 46th ...

Does a one legged duck swim in circles?

What time does a duck wake up in the morning?
-At the quack of dawn!!!

A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. then tells the bartender:
-just put it on my bill!!!!

What's a duck's favorite snack?
-Cheese and quackers!!!

What did the duck say after hearing one of my...

Why are hippy drum circles like high frequency radiation?

They both cause the formation of free radicals.

Why did the 100 legged bug spin around in circles before attacking its prey?

To gain centipedal force

Why was the pilot flying circles over South Korea?

He was Seoul searching.

A young boy says to his father, "Dad, why does the dog spin in circles when she's excited?"

The boy's father replies, "Because it's very hard to spin in squares."

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