The Floppy Disk is like Jesus.

It died to become the Symbol of saving.

What did the floppy disk say to the other floppy disk?

Wanna go out for a byte?

I like my women like I like my hard disks.

Mountable and not FAT.

What is the volume of a disk with radius z and height a?

Pi * z * z * a

I showed my 12 year old son an old floppy disk..

He said "Wow.. Cool! You 3D printed the save icon!"

Brilliant idea for a start-up

Imma build a new operating system which, when the disk gets full, randomly deletes half your files.

Gonna call it thanOS.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Why did the robot need viagra?

His disk was floppy.

Which hard drive is always the happiest?

Disk C:

I had a girlfriend and her favorite Pixar movie was "Up".

This was 2010 and she had it on blue ray, and we would watch it at least once a week at her apartment. But after like the 40th time, I confronted her and said I was tired of watching. The argument got heated; it didn't help that we were drunk. Suddenly, she pushed me and I fell on something. I turne...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Tech support call.

Customer: "I got this problem. You people sent me this install disk, and now my A: drive won't work."

Tech Support: "Your A drive won't work?"

Customer: "That's what I said. You sent me a bad disk, it got stuck in my drive, now it won't work at all."

Tech Support: "Did it not in...

My dying laptop's last wishes

(Coughing) Marvin im dying and before I die (cough intensifies)
I want you to promise me something...you'll take my hard disk and put it in your next computer
I want my memory to live on

Hey girl, are you a computer?

Because you turn my floppy disk into a hard drive.

How many flat earthers does it take to screw in a light bulb

Trick question it’s a light disk

Why was the man uncomfortable using his computer?

Because it was disk inserting.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

The Astronomer

An astronomer on an extended lecture tour became weary of delivering the
same lecture night after night.  He confided this state of mind to his
chauffeur as they were driving to their next destination.  The chauffeur
expressed a similar boredom in his line of work.
     "I've got it!" sa...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

If Dr. Seuss wrote instruction manuals.

If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port,
and the bus is interrupted as a very last resort,
and the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
then the socket packet pocket has an error to report.

If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
and the double-...

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Three men are flying in a helicopter over China: an American, a Chinese man, and a Japanese man.

The American loves China, so he throws a gold disk down to the surface. The Chinese man also loves China, but is not quite as well off, so he throws a silver disk. The Japanese man hates China, so he throws out a live hand grenade.

The three men land and head into town. The American sees a li...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Celebrity Computer Viruses

Monica Lewinsky virus: Sucks all the memory out of your computer.

Ronald Reagan virus: Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored.

Mike Tyson virus: Quits after one byte.

Oprah Winfrey virus: Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands to 300MB.<...

Roman Rollers

Back in the days of the Roman Empire, the famous Emperor Nero instituted a new game.

The players would take those little disks you set your glass on in order to protect the furniture, and see who could get the most distance rolling them across the floor.

They were the first roller coas...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Sexist UFO

A strange disk appeared in the sky. It would hover over groups of women and whistle. Whenever a man would approach it would fly away and hover over another group of women and whistle. The headline in a feminist paper read: Object Defying Women.