It is my wife's birthday tomorrow.

She's been leaving jewelry catalogs all over the house.

So I've bought her a magazine rack.

Last night was horrible, my wife suddenly died so I had to whack off to a Victoria’s Secret catalog.

Edit (spelling): wifi

How did Michael Jackson pick his nose?

From a catalog

WebMD just released the entire catalog of human diseases...

* cancer
* flu

"The Frogs in Prague Defy Catalog"

According to a research team at Charles University in Prague, the local amphibians have very peculiar migratory habits. In recent years, a new sub-species have been identified which is not native to the area around the Czech capitol. The research has been carried out with the help of many students a...

A monk at a Benedictine monastery lived there for many years,

became well known for his immense learning, and eventually rose to the position of abbot, where he gained access to the monastery’s full archives. He decided to open the archives and begin translating and cataloging it.

So he holed up in the vast library, carefully going through its many rare...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Unpopular opinion, but I like the police...

...I mean their back catalog of singles is legendary. Cop their critically acclaimed album “Synchronicity”.

Where do cats like to do their shopping?

A catalog.

John, a high school student, wants to join an afterschool club.

He looks through the catalog and decides on Yearbook. One day after school, he walks through the halls but realizes he doesn't know which room is Yearbook.

Finally, after looking around for 10 minutes, he gives up. He sees a room which has people editing photos inside. Thinking it must be Ye...

A man picks up a phone in the mall...

A man picks up and answers a phone in a mall. A woman is on the other end.
"Hello darling" she says," I recently saw a necklace in a catalog and I want it, so do you mind if i use your credit card?"
"How expensive is it?" the man says.
"Just $1200."
"That cheap? Hell, get four of them f...

What do cats love to read.

catalogs

What's a cats favorite thing to read?

A CATalog

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An anthropologist is completing his lifelong study of world dance...

And he's celebrating. Celebrating his tail off.

See, he'd spent the last 25 years cataloging every single dance performed by every group in the world. Polish Bogarodzicas. Sioux Buckskin dances to Seminole Green Corn dances. Inuit dances to the whales, Ghanaian Kpanlongo, Finnish step-dance. ...

Library Inventory

A librarian in a small book collection is just finishing up the process of cataloging his physical inventory and is combing through the stacks to double-check his work. Suddenly, he sees a bit of crinkled cover just peeking out behind a shelf in the very back of the building. Confused, he steps quie...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sandpaper Sally

A man wants to get his son something very special for his 18th Birthday, so he decides he will make his son a man by buying him a hooker. He goes to his buddies and asks them if they know of a good escort service. They give him a catalog but tell him whatever you do, do not pick Sandpaper Sally.
...

A married pair of Biologists are camping in China...

And after a long day of cataloging the various flora and fauna, they get down to a little love making...

When suddenly, the man feels an ungodly pressure in his stomach. He leaves hastily to the woods to find a suitable place to relieve himself, leaving his wife alone in the tent.

Outs...

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