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Edition Jokes

There should be a millennial edition of Monopoly

[Removed]

Fast & Furious : The politically correct edition

Fast 10 - The seatbelts

Let’s play Clue: Royal Edition

I’m guessing Charles, with a pillow, in the bedroom.

Did you hear about the new sports illustrated swimsuit edition coming out?

It’s gonna be nuts.

On the Bulgarian edition of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire...

The new contestant sits on the chair. He just grunts at the host's introduction questions, so they get straight to the game.

First question - Which city is the capital of Bulgaria:

* A. Sofia
* B. Moscow
* C. London
* D. Paris

Respondent: "I'd like to ask the audience."...

Using Microsoft Edge (Chromium edition) - go to edge://surf

Now your productivity is a joke

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"I can't feel my legs!" (Christmas Edition)

Pt. 1

A guy wakes up in a hospital and starts screaming, "I can't feel my legs! I can't feel my legs! " A nurse rushes to his bed and says, "Of course not, you silly thing, they amputated your arms!"

Pt. 2

Do you know what the poor guy got for Christmas? No? Well, neither does...

The new father

A proud new father sits down with his dad to have a drink.

"Well son, now that you have a son of your own its time I gave you something."

"Dad you dont mea-"

"Yes I do. You've earned it." Says the father as he passes a copy of '1001 Dad Jokes 5th Edition' to the son.

"Da...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

night before christmas (covid edition)

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house,

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse,

Do you know why? Because none of us were

allowed out,

Looked out into the street and no Christmas decorations about,

Looked out of the window, what did I s...

Did you hear Magnum is coming out with a special edition Grinch condom

It's for 39 and a half foot poles

I bought the latest edition of "Reading For Dummies"

The pages were all blank!

ABBA songs Ramadan edition

Gimme gimme gimme a naan after midnight

Survivor: Texas Edition

Due to the popularity of the "Survivor" shows, Texas is planning to do one entitled: "Survivor - Texas Edition".

The lucky contestants will all start in Dallas then drive a circuit to Waco, Austin, San Antonio, Houston, Brownsville, Del Rio, El Paso, Odessa, Midland, Lubbock, Amarillo, Abilen...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Irish Daughter...

An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her return, her father cursed her.
Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old mum thru?
The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff....dad.....

I finally bought the limited edition Thesaurus that I've always wanted, but when I opened it, all the pages were blank.

I have no words to describe how angry I am.

I bought 2 Chainz' latest album, but it was the censored edition.

It's easily one of the best instrumental CDs I've heard in a long time.

Fortnite just released a special Jewish edition of the game

It'll have no Thor skin

Ford is working on a special edition O.J. Simpson Bronco

But instead of white it will be Nicole Brown with blood red interior

more dad-jokes (the limb-less edition)

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean?

Bob.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs at your front door?

Matt.

The neighborhood kids came to Timmy's house and asked if he could...

I accidentally subscribed to the "married man" edition of Playboy.

It's got the same centerfold every month.

4th of July Alcohol puns: American Heroes edition.

So this all started with Abraham Drinkin.

Help us come up with more. It has to be a character from American History to celebrate today as well as some sort of alcohol theme.

Here's what we have so far (some are better than others) :

Abraham Drinkin

John Wilkes Booze
...

Did you hear about Ben & Jerry’s new limited edition Ice Cream flavor?

Peach Mint.

I just spent $100 on a limited edition DVD of Star Trek 2

Turns out the seller was a Kahn man

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Tampax is bringing out a special edition tampon and are replacing the string with tinsel....

It's only for the Christmas period.

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