This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I remember when bandwidth was so bad, your porn was limited to downloading compressed folders of images over modems.

Sigh... * unzips *


Note: if this joke hasn't been made before, y'all are slacking. ;)

I was hesitant to download this app

I knew one day I might regreddit

I decided to let my game download overnight, as it would take many hours.

When I woke up, there was a pop up asking me to confirm the download

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Baby download

Daddy, how was I born? Ah, very well, one day you need to find out anyway! Mom and Dad got together in a chat room. Dad set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber cafe. We snuck into a secluded room, and then your mother downloaded from your dad's memory stick. As soon as dad ...

Why did the Dalai Lama download the gambling app?

He'd heard they had an introductory offer that would make it Free Tibet.

If I download a song illegally from Jamaica, does that make me...

A pirate of the Caribbean?

This mindfulness app is taking a long time to download

It’s really stressing me out...I should really meditate or something.

What is a communist doing when he downloads something?

He is in*stalin*

Ok I'll leave.

I've been trying to download this software ALL day..

I kept getting hung up at the end when it said "finish install". I'm Norwegian.

What is the best way to download a YouTube video?

Screenshot each second and play it on PowerPoint

The cops are questioning me about illegally downloading the entirety of Wikipedia.

I said, “I can explain everything.”

Girl asked me to netflix and chill, but I download all my movies illegally....

So I was like na, more like pirate and booty.

What app do you get, when you download instagram a thousand times?

Instakilo

Why is it legal to download America?

Because it's royalty free.

You wouldn't download a car...

...then why the hell do you download drivers?

It is a little risky to download “Come Sail Away” or “Satisfaction” from the internet. “Turn, Turn, Turn” is perfectly safe however.

Styx and Stones may break your phones, but The Byrds will never hurt you.

What is a pirate's least favorite letter?

Dear Sir/Ma'am

We are cutting your internet connection due to the following reasons:

1. Illegal Downloading

You wouldn’t download a car

Cause trailers are free

I told my sister to download Reddit on her iPhone...

Told her she would never regreddit

ELI5: Why are download speeds so much faster than upload speeds?

Is it because of gravity?

How come erotic games are always digital downloads?

I just want a physical release.

What do you call a small insect that likes to download things illegally off the internet?

A Tor-ant

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's worse than your son to download porn?

Your daughter to upload

I got a Kindle for Christmas that only lets me download modern sociology audiobooks.

I think it speaks volumes on todays society.

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I have been looking for a download of an album I used to have on cassette tape.

Anyone have at link to "Head Cleaner Kit"?

I tried to download an ATV.

But it was a bit Buggy.

If someone sends you a link to download the Homer's Iliad, don't download it...

It's full of trojans!!

I tried to download Ford Racing 2 today...

It crashed.

I never use internet explorer, but when I do

I download google chrome.

A guy was arrested for downloading a poorly rated movie.

It had only a rating of 3.14 on IMDB. But then again, it is illegal to download a pie-rated movie.

Ps: not my joke. Heard it today.

You know, Moses was ahead of his time.

He was the first to download to his tablet from the cloud.

A little boy to his father: "Daddy, how did I actually come into the world?" Daddy replies: "Alright my son, at some point we have to to this talking, so watch out:

Daddy got to know mommy in a "chat room." Later, daddy and mommy met in a "cyber cafe" and on the toilet, mommy wanted to do a few "downloads" of daddy's "Joy Stick". When daddy was then ready for the "upload", we suddenly realized that we had no "firewall" installed and it was already too late to p...

The director of EA walks into a bar

*Download the punchline for only 4.99*

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dear Tech Support

Dear Tech Support, Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance -- particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable pro...

The most important browsers are IE and Edge.

You need them to download Chrome and Firefox.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My sex life just got a whole lot better...

Frontier increased my download speed from 1.5Mbs to 15.

Optimist: "This glass is half-full." Pessimist: "This glass is half-empty."

EA Employee: "Download the next half for $9.99!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Shakespeare - Its better to have loved and lost,

than to stay home every night and download increasingly shameful pornography.

Microsoft Edge is a big improvement over IE...

It downloads Chrome twice as fast!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two thieves break into a man's house...

The man wakes up in the middle of a night and runs down stairs but the thieves escape over the fence so he calls the police. The police get to his house and ask what happened; the mans says: "Well the robbers took off with my personal computer and nothing else before I scared them away", the police ...

Grandma's Password

My 100 year old grandma asked me to set up a security camera, so she could see who was stealing her clothes at her assisted living facility, so I brought over a wireless camera and started to install an app on her IPAD for monitoring.

I needed her Apple ID to download the app, so I asked her ...

Red Neck Computer Dictionary

* LOG ON: Makin’ a woodstove hot.
* LOG OFF: Don’t add no more wood.
* MONITOR: Keepin’ an eye on the wood stove.
* DOWNLOAD: Gittin’ the farwood off the truck.
* MEGA HERTZ: When you’re not keerfull gittin’ the farwood.
* FLOPPY DISC: Whutcha git from trying to tote too much far...

Computer Weight

One day, an angry man ran into the computer shop with his laptop. He shouted at the man on duty,"Your company's website said that this computer would weigh 4.6 pounds. But when I weighed it on my scale, it showed that it weighed 4.61 pounds! I want my money back!" The man on duty replied," I'm sorry...

Yo mamma so fat...

When you download a picture of her at work, the IT department thinks they're under a DDoS attack.

Parents are worried about two things these days

1. What their sons download

2. What their daughters upload

Taxi driver and the tourist

One day, A taxi driver picked up a tourist in a airport and the tourist told the driver to drive him to the hotel. While on the way to the hotel the tourist started bragging about his stuff he owns.

Tourist: you see this camera? It can take 120 frames per second video, very fast!

The...

I just opened up Microsoft Edge...

Now I can download Google Chrome in style.

i talked to your wife...

a guy goes to his rabbi, and says, "I think my wife is trying to poison me. What do I do?"

The rabbi says, "Let me talk to her. Don't worry."

A week later, the rabbi contacts the man. "I spoke to your wife for more than 3 hours...take the poison."

[credit to dinner party down...

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