I got arrested for illegally downloading Wikipedia in its entirety

...before I got arrested I said "wait I can explain everything

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just downloaded porn but the file is compressed

sigh.... *unzips*

Downloading Tik Tok but never opening it is like how Augustus Waters always carries a cigarette in his mouth.

As soon as you use it, you will die of cancer.

We should re-download 2020

Because it has a virus

Downloaded that ap where you post your location when you're drinking a good cup of coffee, I think it's called Grinder.

The real plus is that I haven't paid for a single cup yet!

The fellas around here are just so friendly.

Why did the man get arrested after illegally downloading "Every Breath You Take"?

The file was created by The Police as part of a Sting operation.

I just downloaded my Biology notes but couldn’t open them.

We were studying the helicase. I then had to Unzip the file to open

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I remember when bandwidth was so bad, your porn was limited to downloading compressed folders of images over modems.

Sigh... * unzips *


Note: if this joke hasn't been made before, y'all are slacking. ;)

I´ve just downloaded the Queen movie, Bohemian Rhapsody!

I think it was filmed in a cinema though, as I see a little silhouetto of a man.

The other day I downloaded the maps of Wales, England, Scotland and Northern Ireland for an assignment...

was shocked to see that the total file size was 1GB.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The principal at our school once gave detention to a student for illegally downloading Justin Bieber songs online for free.

Even worse, he expelled another student who actually *paid* for his album.

Moses was the first person to:

Download from Cloud onto a Tablet.

A Biologist downloads tinder.

Select ur profile

Uploads pic*

Select name

Writes down name*

Write down ur description

The biologist thinks a bit and wrote down:

Just trying to change meiosis into mitosis.

What is a pirate's LEAST favorite letter?

Dear Sir or Madam,

Your IP address has been flagged for illegally downloading movies. We will have to suspend your account, pending further investigation.



Sincerely,



The Internet Provider

I was hesitant to download this app

I knew one day I might regreddit

I've just downloaded the whole Quran onto a USB stick.

If any muslims are interested, I'll burn them a copy.

Steven Soderberg’s movie *Contagion* becomes the most downloaded movie of the year 2023

...with 17 downloads

I downloaded all the music to the movie Titanic.

It's syncing now.

My new phone app...

I meant to download a calendar app for my phone, by my eyesight is so bad I downloaded a colander app... now my battery just keeps draining.

I downloaded a torrent the other day and the next day 2 agents knocked on my door accusing me of being a Pirate.

I told them I can’t be a pirate and they asked why is that? I showed them my Reddit profile and said “See, no gold”

Ever since my buddy downloaded Grindr he's been so excited about it

He can barely sit down.

What app do you get, when you download instagram a thousand times?

Instakilo

If I download a song illegally from Jamaica, does that make me...

A pirate of the Caribbean?

This mindfulness app is taking a long time to download

It’s really stressing me out...I should really meditate or something.

Girl asked me to netflix and chill, but I download all my movies illegally....

So I was like na, more like pirate and booty.

All these "Don't pay too much for [x]" Wikibuy/Honey ads are really convincing.

They convinced me to download Adblocker.

What is a communist doing when he downloads something?

He is in*stalin*

Ok I'll leave.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Baby download

Daddy, how was I born? Ah, very well, one day you need to find out anyway! Mom and Dad got together in a chat room. Dad set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber cafe. We snuck into a secluded room, and then your mother downloaded from your dad's memory stick. As soon as dad ...

Why did the Dalai Lama download the gambling app?

He'd heard they had an introductory offer that would make it Free Tibet.

Cop: We suspect you have illegally downloaded all the editions of Encyclopedia Brittanica.

Man: Wait! I can explain everything!

I've been trying to download this software ALL day..

I kept getting hung up at the end when it said "finish install". I'm Norwegian.

A guy was arrested for downloading a poorly rated movie.

It had only a rating of 3.14 on IMDB. But then again, it is illegal to download a pie-rated movie.

Ps: not my joke. Heard it today.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I prefer illegally downloading bangbros videos over watching free sites.

It feels more like I'm the one fucking the porn stars.

TIFU by downloading a movie from an arabic website. The language was dubbed.

And before you all go on saying wrong sub, well, yes, that was arabic too.

I downloaded the last Super Bowl and finally watched it on VLC

Turns out you can love the player and hate the game

You wouldn't download a car...

...then why the hell do you download drivers?

What is the best way to download a YouTube video?

Screenshot each second and play it on PowerPoint

A man is at his house when he hears a loud knock on his door

He looks out the window and sees a police officer so he opens up and says,
"hello officer, what can I do for you?" the officer says,
"I'm sorry sir, but you're under arrest for illegally downloading all of wikipedia," frantically, the man replies,
"Officer wait, I can explain everything!"

My friends secretly downloaded a 700MB exe file into my laptop.

I think it's a huge setup.

Downloaded a new app, forced to wear a Santa costume now for the next two months

Turns out I didn't read the Santa clause.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

BBC News: "Illegally downloading pirated films is costing hundreds of millions of pounds a year"

Fuck, what site are they downloading them from? It's free for me..

I started downloading Jaws the other day

But after one megabyte, my computer died.

Why is it legal to download America?

Because it's royalty free.

It is a little risky to download “Come Sail Away” or “Satisfaction” from the internet. “Turn, Turn, Turn” is perfectly safe however.

Styx and Stones may break your phones, but The Byrds will never hurt you.

I accidentally downloaded Timber instead of Tinder the other day

Unfortunately I didn’t hook up with anyone, but I did have a lot of trees fall for me

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I told my buddy that I got fired for downloading porn at work and causing everything to crash...

"That's a bit harsh," he said.

I replied, "They don't screw around at Air Traffic Control."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dear Tech Support...

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance - particularly in the flower and jewelry applications,which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 then uninstalled many other val...

Jesus and Satan were having an ongoing argument about who was better on his computer.

They had been going at it for days, and God was tired of hearing all of the bickering.

Finally God said, "Cool it. I am going to set up a test that will run two hours and I will judge who does the better job."

So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away. They moused. Th...

I downloaded a swearing dictionary from the Pirate Bay and

Received a torrent of abuse.

You wouldn’t download a car

Cause trailers are free

What do you call a man who illegally downloaded a documentary about circles?

A *πrate*

I told my sister to download Reddit on her iPhone...

Told her she would never regreddit

I downloaded an app that I thought would help me find great sandwiches...

Turns out that's not what Grinder is for. I still got a footlong, though.

ELI5: Why are download speeds so much faster than upload speeds?

Is it because of gravity?

Ever since I downloaded AdBlock on my computer...

All the local girls in my area seem to have lost interest.

What is a pirate's favorite letter?

Your download is starting...
Click here if it doesn't start automatically

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call it when you cum on a sad girl?

A download.

How come erotic games are always digital downloads?

I just want a physical release.

In the old days, when you illegally downloaded music it would transfer everything but the drum tracks, so you’d have to duplicate those on your own.

That’s why they say you can’t steal music without repercussion.

What do you call a small insect that likes to download things illegally off the internet?

A Tor-ant

The CIA found evidence that Osama Bin Laden had downloaded a lot of videos about how to crochet

Turns out he was trying to replace all those lost afghans

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's worse than your son to download porn?

Your daughter to upload

If we all end up going to jail for downloading music......

I at least hope they separate us by music genre.

Why did the EU start downloading random stuff to it's computer?

It had freed up one GB of space.

I got a Kindle for Christmas that only lets me download modern sociology audiobooks.

I think it speaks volumes on todays society.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I have been looking for a download of an album I used to have on cassette tape.

Anyone have at link to "Head Cleaner Kit"?

Yo Daddy so dumb....

He downloaded Tinder to buy firewood

And Grindr for the woodchipper

I've just downloaded a copy of the Bible from the internet…

When I'd finished, it said, "Saved."

Getting an STD is like downloading a virus...

...but getting married is like downloading ransomware.

I downloaded corn onto my computer.

It messed up the kernel.

I tried to download an ATV.

But it was a bit Buggy.

I downloaded Friedrich Nietszche's voice for my navigation system

Now it just tells me to find my own way.

The director of EA walks into a bar

*Download the punchline for only 4.99*

I downloaded an app that notifies me when Trump throws a tantrum.

It's called Twitter.

If someone sends you a link to download the Homer's Iliad, don't download it...

It's full of trojans!!

I tried to download Ford Racing 2 today...

It crashed.

What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?

The one from his lawyer telling him all the illegal downloading charges have been dropped.

Did you hear about the guy who illegally downloaded Free Fallin' and Refugee?

He was charged with Petty theft.

A little boy to his father: "Daddy, how did I actually come into the world?" Daddy replies: "Alright my son, at some point we have to to this talking, so watch out:

Daddy got to know mommy in a "chat room." Later, daddy and mommy met in a "cyber cafe" and on the toilet, mommy wanted to do a few "downloads" of daddy's "Joy Stick". When daddy was then ready for the "upload", we suddenly realized that we had no "firewall" installed and it was already too late to p...

I downloaded some hymns for my ipod

New praylist.

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