UPJOKE
collectcomposeinterpretercomputer programsource codemakemachine codetranslatoramassfundaccumulatepile upcpuassemblerdecompiler

How does Big Shaq compile his software?

From raw source.
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Why does chav code never compile?

They end every statement with init
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Hey girl, are you a Java compiler?

Because when I proposed a Date, you said I wasn't your type.
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I've compiled my Dad Joke Insults and archived them.

I call it the "Dad Abase."
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99 little bugs in the code...

99 bugs in the code. Fix one bug, compile it down. 167 little bugs in the code....sigh.
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I've compiled a list of the top 10 click bait articles on the internet

Number 7 will shock you
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I just compiled my new app, its named "Politics".

It's corrupted.
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The Smiths were proud of their family tradition. Their ancestors had come to America on the Mayflower and their descendants included senators and Wall Street wizards.

They decided to compile a family history, a legacy for their children and grandchildren.
They hired a fine author.
Only one problem arose, how to handle great-uncle George, the criminal, who was executed in the electric chair.
The author said he could handle the story tactfully.
The book...
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I compiled my program and it ran perfectly...

but now I'll have to chase it.
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I have compiled a list of the 10 worst things about my ADHD.

1.
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I've compiled a list of famous athletes who have spent time in prison.

It's a pros and cons list.
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To make a better Internet, I compiled a list of scams and manipulation techniques in order to raise awareness in the most gullible users.

Number 27 will make you cringe
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Excorcising an evil computer be like...

The power of Christ compiles you!

THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPILES YOU!
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Did you hear what the dyslexic man said when the police shot an unarmed programmer?

"They should have just compiled!!!"
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This is a little self-indulgent, but I'm a high school teacher and I just compiled some one-liners from the past year or so

[They can be found here](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1XWPHTS7bAcbKV5GsL3Vhx7gUmm0DnFr-aOutUtV8LRM/edit?usp=sharing)
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Sunbathing...

A man was sunbathing naked, when a little girl came along. He quickly covered himself with a hat and the girl asked him "What's under the hat?" The man said "It's my little bird, but he's shy so move along." The girl compile and moved along while the man went to sleep. He later woke up in a hospital...
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Inception joke

A taxi driver picks up a girl from a club and has to take her home. As the ride was quite long he asks her if she wants to hear a joke. She says yes and he starts:

" One day God sent Saint Peter down to Earth to perform a statistic of how many girls between 15 and 25 years old are still virgi...

Pun researchers

Psychologists interested in humor wanted to know more about how people respond to puns, specifically what kinds of puns make people laugh. The compiled a list of ten representative puns, and showed them to a group of 100 people to see which of the puns would make those people laugh, and discovered t...
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A letter from Walmart

Dear Mrs. Samples:

Over the past six months, your husband, Royse Samples has been causing quite a commotion in our Lawton store. We cannot tolerate this type of behavior and, as a result, will ban your entire family from shopping in any of our stores if even one more incident occurs. We have ...
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A love story

A Love Story


Micro was a real time user and a dedicated multi-user. His broad-band protocol made it easy for him to interface with numerous input/output devices, even if it meant time sharing.

One evening Micro arrived home just as the sun was crashing. He had parked his Motorola ...

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A princess wanted to get married...

Deep in the German forests, there was a huge castle. It housed the king, his beautiful daughter and some servants. One day, the princess decided that she wanted to get married to a man. When she confronted her father and told him about her decision, he got very displeased and denied her request. Aft...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Old enough to serve, not old enough to be served: the Army and Alcohol

There was a thread a while back where a pun thread took off; it was about the moral hypocrisy of being allowed to put your life at risk fighting in war, while simultaneously not being allowed to drink alcohol.

While I detest most pun threads, this one seemed entertaining to me for some reason...

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