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Collections Jokes

How do churches split the collections?

A man goes to a Catholic church and says to the priest "Father, I was wondering, how do you decide how much of each collection goes to God and how much goes to you?" and the priest says "Come come, I'll show you." So the priest draws a circle on the ground and says "I throw the collection up in the...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A garbage man is doing his collections....

..... he sees that one house has not put their bin out front. He checks down the side of the house, it's not there, so he knocks at the front door. No answer, so he rings the bell, still no answer. He knocks one last time, waits and finally starts walking back down the path towards the street. But t...

Why did the gymnast's account get sent to collections?

She had an outstanding balance.

I think my wife is putting glue on my weapons collection

She denies it , but I'm sticking to my guns

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

TIL that Melvil Dewey, inventor of the Dewey Decimal system for organizing library collections, was known to be a serial sexual harasser.

Someone really should've put him in his place.

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