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Bugs Jokes

99 bugs in the code...

99 bugs in the code, 99 bugs in the code!
Take one down, patch it around.
127 bugs in the code.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What kind of poops do Stick Bugs make?

Dowel Movements.

(an original from my 10 year old)

99 little bugs in the code...

99 bugs in the code. Fix one bug, compile it down. 167 little bugs in the code....sigh.

Bugs annoy people in the PokĂŠmon games,

but entertain people in the Space Jam movies.

All web developers hate finding bugs in their work.

Except spiders

99 programming bugs in the code

99 programming bugs in the code.

99 programming bugs.

Take one down, patch it all up.

111 programming bugs in the code.


EDIT: FRONT PAGE! HOLY COW! Thanks so much, reddit! Credit goes to my IT teacher.
EDIT 2: WE SURPASSED 1K UPVOTES!?!?! THANKS!

Elmer Fudd and Bugs bunny are planning to rob a distillery.

Bugs asks Elmer “if it is whiskey”? Elmer replies, “yes, but not as whiskey as robbing a bank”!

Every summer I get bit by exactly one thousand and twenty four bugs

My wife told me to get over it cause it was just one byte.

Bugs Bunny meets a chiropractor

For the first time ever, somebody called the chiropractor "doc."

Bugs Bunny goes to a medical convention

He meets a cardiologist, and says "what's up, doc?"

He meets a dentist, and says "what's up, doc?"

He meets a chiropractor, and says "what's up?"

Arnold Schwarzenegger no longer kills people and now only kills bugs.

He’s an exterminator

Some bugs are worshipping a false prophet

Imma scare the bee jesus out of them

Why do bugs have odd beliefs?

They're in sects.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is the last thing that goes through a bugs' mind as it hits a windshield?

His butt.

Are bugs good to eat?

A boy asks his father, "Dad, are bugs good to eat?" "That's disgusting. Don't talk about things like that over dinner," the dad replies. After dinner the father asks, "Now, son, what did you want to ask me?" "Oh, nothing," the boy says. "There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone."

What do bugs write on?

Flypaper!

Why do programmers prefer dark mode?

Cause light attracts bugs.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So you know how bed bugs come from beds?

Have you thought about cockroaches

Told a joke to a bunch of bugs

And I’ll heard was crickets…

Did you know that tree branches are the best tools for catching bugs?

They're very sticky.

Bugs in C code should be called fishes

Because fishes are found in the sea

What does Bugs Bunny put on his intergalactic PB&J sandwich?

Space jam.

Did you see that movie with the bugs living together in an apartment?

It's about ten ants.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A bugs life

A mother and son were driving her n the highway. As they were driving a dildo hit the windshield of the car. Her son asked her, “what was that mommy?”

Not wanting to explain what a dildo was to her son replied, “It was just a bug, honey.”

The boy replied, “What kind of bug was it?”
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Horny glow bugs...

are fucking lit.

What did Bugs Bunny say after beaming aboard the Enterprise?

What's up Spock?

WANTED: Large amount of rats, mice and bed bugs

… as my current rental agreement requires me to leave the apartment in the condition it was when I moved in.

A man goes to a doctor because he always sees bugs that playing soccer through his eyes

Doctor: "So we need an MRI scan. We couid make you an appointment next sunday".
The patient seems surprised: "Are you nuts? Sunday is the finals".

I am obsessed with bugs that give people Lyme Disease.

I might even be atickted to it.

What kind of bugs smell the best?

Deodor-ants

On the seventh day God rested when He should've fixed the bugs.

Just came up with this after dealing with somebody's PMS.

What did the other bugs call the bug who wanted to be an astronaut?

A LUNAtick

Where do bugs get off the train?

Infest-station.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I was a kid I was terrified of earwigs because I thought they were bugs that crawled into your ears.

So you can imagine my reaction when I heard about cockroaches.

Did you hear about the Bed Bugs getting married?

The wedding was held in the spring.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Johnny and his Bugs

While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, "No honey for you for one month!" Later that afternoon, Johnny's dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. "That's it! No butter for you for one month!" says his dad. ...

You know what bugs me?

The CIA.

What are American bugs attracted to?

Oil lamps

Bugs Bunny walks into a hospital

He asks his doctor “What’s up, doc?”

The doctor replies “Your blood pressure, Bugs.”

“And if I don’t get it sorted out?”

The doctor, visually distraught, answers: “That’s all, folks.”

Scientists have found crazed bugs on the moon.

Lunar ticks

Why do you never see any bugs in a church?

Because they are in sects.

How did Bugs Bunny find out his girlfriend was cheating on him?

She coughed up a hare ball.

Why does Bugs Bunny like Lola Bunny so much?

She's a friend with bunny feets.

I don’t understand how people are complaining about visual bugs in Cyberpunk 2077

It’s just your character’s cyberoptics malfunctioning.

Two bugs are having a conversation...

A fly asks a small bug on its back "Hey bug on my back, are you a mite?"

The small bug replies, "I mite be."

The fly says, "Stupidest pun I ever heard."

The small bug replies, "What do you expect? I just made it up on the fly!"

If life is just a game, then mosquitos aren’t bugs

They’re features

What kind of web developer likes to find bugs?

A Spider

What’s a good way to pass time with some bugs?

Magic ticks!

What did bugs bunny save his word processing as?

Whats up.doc

My army of bugs is crippled. All my soldiers are much too short to be good fighters, and I require more bread to feed them.

I lack toast and taller ants.

We decided to call our dog ‘low priority bugs’

That way people will understand why we don’t plan to get him fixed.

What is Bugs Bunny's favorite computer file?

What's up.doc

Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck we're in the middle of a robbery...

Bugs Bunny asked Daffy, "Is this whiskey?"

Daffy answered, "Of course it's whiskey, but it's safer than wobbing a bank"

I went to a fancy Italian restaurant but stormed out when I found bugs in my food.

Turned out it was the anty pasto.

I'm so mad! I found out my grandfather clock is full of bugs.

I guess it's like they say, time flies.

Seeing Paul Rudd and Tom Holland together really bugs me

Its make my skin crawl

Arnold Shwartznager just left his Hollywood career to kill bugs that infiltrate people's houses.

He is now an Ex-Terminator.

What do you call bugs that handle your money?

Fine ants.

Hey I seem to have picked up a stomach bug

So far just explosive diarrhea. I will keep y’all posted as situation can best be described as fluid.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What’s the last thing that goes through a bugs mind when it hits your windshield?

Its asshole.

Credit to my dad many, many years ago.

How many bugs does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two but the trick is getting them inside.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What’s the difference between a bunch of bugs and Dwayne Johnson’s personal trainers?

One is a group of cockroaches, the other’s a bunch of Rock coaches

Do you know what really bugs me?

Insect puns

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