The CEOs of Miller, Budweiser, Cours, and Guinness walk into a bar

The CEO of Miller says to the bartender, "I want the best beer you have, a Miller Lite."

"Oh no," says the Budweiser CEO. "Your head is on backwards. Me, I'll have the king of beers, a Budweiser."

"I'll have the only beer brewed with Rocky Mountain spring water," chimes in the Coors C...

I brewed my coffee with Redbull today

I can smell noises

Captain John McGrue was one of the most respected explorers

Born in England, he became known for his seafaring skills at a young age. At the age of 20, he heard the legends of the greatest drinks in the world, a quest many explorers had tried, but unfortunately none could complete the trip. McGrue was talked out of it by every friend, until at 28, already an...

A guy walks into a fabulously hip gastro pub

A guy walks into a fabulously hip gastro pub that only specializes in craft-made IPAs and locally brewed beers. He carries in his own German-made beer mug and pops it up on the bar. "Pour me a Bud Light!" he says. " The waitress recoils and looks to the bartender for guidance. "Fill His Stein," the ...

I cold brewed my coffee for the first time this morning.

It didn't come out so hot...

An Ethnomedicine researcher is visiting a tribe deep in the Amazon...

An ethnomedicine researcher is visiting a tribe deep in the Amazon and they present to him the leaves of a short native palm tree. They tell him that these leaves can be brewed into a tea that is a powerful laxative.

He says, "well, in extreme cases, do you ever have to resort to giving an en...

Old Women Bragging About Their Sons

Three old ladies are sitting around a table playing bridge and bragging about their sons. “My Freddie,” said Margaret, “Everyone should be so lucky to have a son like my Freddie. Once a week he brings me a huge bouquet of flowers, he’s constantly bringing me out to restaurants to eat, if I so much a...

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Work it out with a pencil

(Trying to fix up a joke that was brewed up this past weekend.)

There's this French guy, squatting by a river, with his pants around his knees, his bare butt hanging over the water. A stranger comes out of the woods, sees this, and notices 2 dangling bits on the French guy.

"Omg! You ...

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A biker walks into a bar.

As he made his way to the bartender, he spotted a 30-ish y/o man sitting in his table with a serious look in his face, staring daggers at the cup of drink before him.

Feeling great for the day, the biker made his way to the sitting man and directly took his cup, and drank the whole thing as a...

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A man is drowning his sorrows at a bar.

Over his beer, he tells the bartender, "I built this bar, you know, and many other buildings over the years. But do they call me McGregor the builder? No, they do not.

Look outside. Do you see that road? I built that too, and many others over the years. Do they call me McGregor the road buil...

A man and his three beautiful daughters.

There once was a man living out in the countryside with his wife and his three beautiful daughters; Anne, Beth, and Claire. The man was very protective of his daughters, and when he learned that all three of them had fallen in love with three different men, he called the three men and said he wanted...

Beer CEOs walk into a bar...

The CEOs of Budweiser, Guinness, Coors, and Miller all walk into a bar after a beer-tasting contest. The CEO of Budweiser steps up to the bar and says: "I'll have a Budweiser, the King of Beers!" The Coors CEO says: "I'll have a Coors, the beer as cool as the Rockies!" The Miller CEO says, in turn: ...

Listen now to the story of the two brothers Hing and Ming

Listen now to the story of the two brothers Hing and Ming. Each was devoted to the search for ultimate wisdom, but they differed greatly on how it was to be found. One day their pet chicken fell ill, began to molt, and soon lost all of its feathers! The brothers decided that this would be an ideal t...

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A Texan, a Kentuckian, a Californian, and an Oregonian are all sitting around a campfire...

A Texan, a Kentuckian, a Californian, and an Oregonian are all sitting around a campfire, talking and BSing. Being a Texan, the first man decides to use a lull in the conversation to prove his manhood to the group. He pulls out a 6-pack of Lone Star beer and a revolver, slams down one of the beers i...

Macduff was on his deathbed.

He called on his good friend, Macleod, to visit him before he died. "Macleod," he said, "take that bottle of whisky on the bedside table. It's a Macallan 1951, brewed the year I was born. You'll never find a finer Scotch. When I am buried, I want you to pour it on my grave."

Macleod nodded so...

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A man goes out drinking and find an unusually downtrodden bartender.

He asks the bartender what the matter is and he says:

“You see this bar? I built it with my own two hands. No one’s ever called me bar builder.

You see that beer? I brewed it myself. No one’s ever called me beer brewer.

You see that deer on the wall? I killed and stuffed it myse...

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Guy walks into a bar joke.....

A man who is down in the dumps walks into a bar. He tells the bar tender how is wife was cheating on him and in the divorce he got screwed out of everything and has no money, no house, nothing but the clothes on his back. He then asks the bar tender what it would take for him to drink free for the n...

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