UPJOKE
stillwhiskeyvodkabrandyalerumevaporationrefluxtequilaplantwhiskyliquorbrewerycondensationhooch

So Daffy Duck and Elmer Fudd break into a distillery. Daffy turns to Elmer and says: “Is this Whiskey?”

Elmer says: “Yeth but not as whiskey as wobbing a bank!!”

As the owner of a start up gin distillery I've been trying to break into the Asian market.

Unfortunately though the Thai tonic mixes very poorly with ice.

I was thinking about going into business and opening my own distillery...

But my accountant thinks that's a whiskey investment.

Why is the forklift operator at the distillery you own always so nice to you?

Because it's his job to lift your spirits.

There are two Chinese guys, one of them wants to rob a brewery…

His friend asks; “Why don’t we rob a distillery, we’d make more money?”

“It’s too whisky.”

If Tom Cruise owned a liquor distillery, what would he call it?

Whiskey Business

My great-grandfather started up an underground distillery during Prohibition

It was a whiskey business

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dear Son,

Just a few lines to let you know I'm still alive. I'm writing this letter slowly because I know you can't read fast. We are all doing very well. You won't recognise the house when you get home - because we have moved. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from you...

Did you hear about the allegations on the forged distillery?

Sorry, fake brews.

I want to start my own distillery, but i'm a bit hesitant....

it's a whisky business.

A man falls into a vat at a scotch distillery...

he drowns in the vat and the workers decide that despite this they'll still bottle this batch.

While tasting they agreed that despite the odd taste it was full bodied.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It was the 4th grade teacher’s birthday and all the kids brought in presents.

The teacher was a little worried about Billy’s present though because his father owned a vodka distillery. And ask Billy ever talked about was his father’s business; how vodka was made, what made vodka the best liquor etc. So she has a bad feeling she knew what Billy’s gift would be.

Finally...

Who would win in a drinking game between an Irishman and a Scotsman?

The distillery.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A boat was shipwrecked in the South Pacific, as a result...

A group of people from different nationalities found themselves stranded on a remote and beautiful island. The party consisted of:

-Two Italian men and one Italian woman

-Two French men and one French woman

-Two German men and one German woman

-Two Greek men and one Greek...

what causes arthritis?

A man who smelled like a distillery flopped on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes, the disheveled ...

A joke told to me by a tour guide while in Scotland

One night, a Scottish distillery caught fire and burnt all night. One million bottles of Scotch Whiskey were destroyed and gave the fire a bright blue flame.

The next morning a local news station began interviewing the locals in a nearby village about the fire. Everyone they asked agreed tha...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.