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Barreled Jokes

A woman collapsed on the street

Her husband, luckily, was able to catch her in time.

"Is anyone here a doctor!?" The husband shouted with sheer panic in his tone.

A man barreled through the onlooking crowd, knocking a few of them over to join the husband and wife.

"I'm a vegan!" The man said.

Late again!” the third-grade teacher sternly said to Little Johnny.

“It ain’t my fault this time, Miss Russell. You can blame this ‘un on my Daddy. The reason I’m three hours late is my Daddy sleeps naked!”

Now, Miss Russell had taught grammar school for thirty-some-odd years.

Despite her mounting fears, she asked Little Johnny what he meant by that....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old prospector shuffled into the town of El Indio, Texas leading a tired old mule.

The old man headed straight for the only saloon in town, to clear his parched throat.

He walked up to the saloon and tied his old mule to the hitch rail.

As he stood there, brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man wins a safari trip...

Having never done anything like this before in his life, he goes to visit a big-game hunter for some pointers.

"Oh, nothing to it, old boy," the grizzled hunter chuckled. He removed a double-barreled elephant gun from its stand and handed it to the man. "If a lion charges, just plant your fe...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two boys were playing in the sandbox with a girl

**This is a joke my grandpa just told me (he was a Navy guy).**

Two boys were playing in the sandbox with a girl; the boys’ names were Tom and Dick and the girl’s name was Sally.

Tom decided to challenge Sally to a contest. The rules of the contest were as follows: each child had to bu...

Santa's annual check ride

As the sled rotated off the runway, the examiner pulled a double-barreled shotgun from under his cloak and blasted one of the raindeer. He then turned to the perplexed Santa and said "Engine failure on take-off!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In the draw down of WWII...

Dignitaries and generals were touring Nazi facilities in Europe. One of the stops that they made was at a naval base where the dreaded U-Boats were based.

The dignitaries and their staffs were headed to a captured U-Boat, when a droning was noticed, and the air raid sirens went off. The Luft...

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