An overconfident MMA fighter entered the cage without proper warmup and had not trained for months. Subsequently he incurred a severe injury for which the doctor advised to not enter the ring ever again. Thus it is appropriately said...
A grapple a day keeps the doctor away
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A young soldier is having a cigarette...
A young Corporal is sitting in the smoking area having a cigarette, when a brand new Lieutenant walks up him. The Lieutenant asks "Corporal, do you have change for a $20 bill?" The Corporal replies "Yea, sure buddy, one second." Hearing this, the Officer grows cross. "Corporal, I am a Commissioned O...
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The Three Simple Things in This World That Give Me The Most Joy In This Life Are…
Eating Puppies and Not Using Commas Appropriately.
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A concerned parent calls their child’s pediatrician and says, “Recently my child has started eating power cords. What should I do?”
Without missing a beat the doctor responds, “depending on the current situation at home you need to ground him until he can conduct himself appropriately!”
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
The Thumb King
Once upon a time, there was a Land of Fingers. Everyone who lived in the Land of Fingers was, appropriately enough, a Finger. All the Fingers, from mighty Index to cute little Pinky lived together in peace and harmony. Then one day came Thumb. Thumb was like the Fingers, but different. Shorter, stur...
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In honor of the Bowling Green Massacre, wear a green ribbon . . .
. . . or, perhaps more appropriately, some color you made up in your head.
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I need assistance reddit. I work with kids and need jokes puns and otherwise for fall and Halloween.
The more groan worthy the better. Once i have enough i will put them in a box/ bag appropriately named the "monster box" since it looks like a green monster.
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