An overconfident MMA fighter entered the cage without proper warmup and had not trained for months. Subsequently he incurred a severe injury for which the doctor advised to not enter the ring ever again. Thus it is appropriately said...
A grapple a day keeps the doctor away
A young soldier is having a cigarette...
A young Corporal is sitting in the smoking area having a cigarette, when a brand new Lieutenant walks up him. The Lieutenant asks "Corporal, do you have change for a $20 bill?" The Corporal replies "Yea, sure buddy, one second." Hearing this, the Officer grows cross. "Corporal, I am a Commissioned O...
The Three Simple Things in This World That Give Me The Most Joy In This Life Are…
Eating Puppies and Not Using Commas Appropriately.
A concerned parent calls their child’s pediatrician and says, “Recently my child has started eating power cords. What should I do?”
Without missing a beat the doctor responds, “depending on the current situation at home you need to ground him until he can conduct himself appropriately!”
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
The Thumb King
Once upon a time, there was a Land of Fingers. Everyone who lived in the Land of Fingers was, appropriately enough, a Finger. All the Fingers, from mighty Index to cute little Pinky lived together in peace and harmony. Then one day came Thumb. Thumb was like the Fingers, but different. Shorter, stur...
In honor of the Bowling Green Massacre, wear a green ribbon . . .
. . . or, perhaps more appropriately, some color you made up in your head.
I need assistance reddit. I work with kids and need jokes puns and otherwise for fall and Halloween.
The more groan worthy the better. Once i have enough i will put them in a box/ bag appropriately named the "monster box" since it looks like a green monster.
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