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Truckers Jokes

So Tod goes to a new truckers joint...

He sits down and the waiter approaches him.

Do you want to hear the daily specials sir? He asks.

"No thank you", says Todd, "let me smell your hand and I'll tell you want I'd like today".

So the waiter reluctantly proceeds to offer his hand to be smelled by this weird customer.<...

Why is today National Truckers Day?

Because it’s 10/4 Good Buddy!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Trucker goes into a truck stop...

And takes a seat next to a colleague. They chat about their routes and generally shoot the breeze for a while, until a woman passes by them and goes into the bathroom.

As she comes out, the second trucker mutters "tickle your ass with a feather?"

The woman, in shock, whirls around an...

truckers...

As a Polish truck driver is driving east he sees a truck driving west, and the CB crackles to life. "Hey, buddy, who are the two biggest morons in America?" comes from the CB.

"I don't know," says the Polack.

The other driver says, "You and your brother!"

"Screw you," says the P...

What do Canadian geese, and Canadian truckers have in common?

They block the roads and honk

The truckers who transport donkey meat are very hurried

They spend their entire work day hauling ass

What’s a truckers favorite kind of house?

The ones with the long haul ways!

Today should be a holiday honoring all the truckers who have kept America going during the Covid epidemic.

A big 10-4, if you will.

What is a Truckers favorite part about the movies?

The trailer

A blonde joke Truckers should get

Did you hear about the blonde who tried to kill her trucker husband? She cut the lines to his truck's air brakes

A trucker picks up a hitch hiker

They get a few miles down the road and the hitch hiker notices a monkey sitting on the truckers' head rest.

"Damn man! You got a pet monkey?"

"Well," the trucker replied, "it gets loney out here on the road. I needed some company. I don't like dogs or cats. And monkeys are easy to tr...

Where do the Mexican truckers hang out?

The guay station.

How do truckers contact each other in Wisconsin?

They use a Milwaukee-Talkie

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Some truckers have a dog for company...

A trucker is driving West across Texas, haulin' a trailer full of chickens, with his pet parrot in the cab. While driving through Dallas he sees a beautiful woman on the side of road, leg hiked up, thumb out. He stops and looks at her. "Where ya headed?" He asks. "Headed to California." She says gra...

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A Trucker picks up a Polish Hitch Hiking Blonde chick.

She gets in the cab of his truck and away they go.After a few miles the Blonde is looking around the inside of the cab of the truck and sees the Truckers C.B. Radio.She asks"whats that?" The Trucker replies,"Thats my C.B. Radio,I can talk to just about anybody in the world with that there radio."The...

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The purple flower joke. (Very long)

Once there was a boy in 5th grade, and he really liked this girl (simp) and he knew that she liked the color purple.

So one day during recess he found these purple flowers and decided to make his move on the girl, so he walked up to her (with the flowers) and said "You are my purple flower" a...

Google Doodles

Four people are sitting at a bar. A native American, a trucker, a business woman, and a google employee walks up to these people, and asks them:

“Do any of you know of an important problem facing our society? If so, then we can make a doodle of it and put it on our search homepage to raise aw...

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A man is on the side of the road hitchhiking

Two truckers stop and pick him up.
They're driving along and the trucker driving farts. It's completely silent. Then the trucker sitting next to him farts, and it makes no sound at all. The hitchhiker farts, and it's loud enough to shake the whole cab.

Both the truckers turn and yell "vi...

The cowboy

A lady sees a cowboy and says "are you really a cowboy?" The cowboy says "why yes mame, born and raised right here in Montana and have worked on the ranch since I was knee high to a pup."

The woman says " I've always wondered why cowboys always wear those big hats." The wide brim keeps the s...

An old English gentleman walks into a diner in the USA

He sees the clients are either truckers or bikers and the place is a mess and has way more clients than they should, he sits down, asks for the menu and sees a large colorful print:

"Buy a meal and get a handjob from the coo For 10$!"

He walks into the kitchen and sees a gorgeous blon...

So these two pieces of Interstate highway are drinking at the bar...

So these two pieces of Interstate highway are drinking at the bar. The first says "I'm I-10, baby! Atlantic to Pacific! Long and Strong. All day, traffic, truckers and they're flying along at ninty miles per hour. Cuz I'm the Best!" The other piece of highway snorts. "You got nothin! I'm I-95. Alway...

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