How many times do you have to tickle an octopus to make it laugh?

Ten-tickles.

Of course it only has 8 of those.

So the first two were test-tickles!

Cakeday favorite string of jokes. How many tickles does it take to tickle a squid?

Tentacles.
How do you check that? Test tickles!
What did the octopus think? You gotta be squidding me!

How many tickles does it take to turn on a anime girl?

Tentacles

Man tries to tickle.

A man was sitting next to his wife. He reaches over and tries to tickle her,

"Tickle, Tickle, Tickle!'

The woman says, "Stop!"

The man tries to tickle her again,

"Tickle, Tickle, Tickle!"

"Stop, please!" She asked.

The man tries to tickle her once more,
<...

Someone tickled me today and then asked: "Did you feel that?"

It was nice to finally receive a stimulus check.

Does every Tickle-Me-Elmo have to have test-tickles before they leave the factory?

No, Not every one, only the males

How many test tickles does a test tickler test Tickle Me Elmo?

Two, two test tickles.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There's an elderly couple who has reached that point in life, where sex isn't part of the itinerary anymore. One night, the wife turns to her husband and says, "Every-time one of us wants to have a bit of a slap and tickle, we just have to say, "Washing machine."

A night passes, and the husband leans over and whispers, "Washing machine." The wife gives him a shove and informs him that she has a headache.

A few nights go by and the same thing happens, but the husband is determined and he reckons he’ll just give it one more try. He leans over and whispe...

I tickled my brother the other day and got into trouble for it

My mom said that he has to be born before i can do that

Did you hear that they are thinking about recalling innapropriate Tickle Me Elmo dolls?

Apparently, people at the factory have been giving him test-tickles

I tickled my little sister's foot this morning and my mum went crazy about it...

..something about waiting until she was born

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do senators like tickled during sex?

Their SCOTUS

My girlfriend has a tickle fetish, so I decided to practice on my coworkers

Unfortunately I was fired when my test-tickles were exposed to upper management.

What’s the last thing they gave to Tickle Me Elmo before he left the factory?

Two Test Tickles.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It's my cake day today, so I'll give you one of my favourite jokes since 15+ years ago.

There is a factory that makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.

Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 8:00 am.

The next day at 8:45 am there is a knock at the Personnel Manager’s door. Th...

How do you tickle a rich girl?

'Gucci, Gucci, Gucci!'

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear the one about the blonde who worked at the toy factory?

The manager asked her “why do all of these Tickle Me Elmo dolls have two red balls attached?

She replied “I thought you said that every doll was supposed to get two test-tickles”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How do you give a lemon an orgasm?

Tickle its Citorus.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy lost his penis in an accident and there were no suitable donors...

A guy lost his penis in an accident and there were no suitable donors, so the only available option to the surgeon was to attach a baby elephant's trunk. After the surgery and healing process, the guy is ready to start dating again. He's out on his 1st date since the accident and while at the dinn...

What is it called when you poke someone to see if it tickles?

A test tickle.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you get when you tickle santas balls

A white Christmas

A young woman gets her first job at the Tickle-me Elmo factory.

The boss takes her up to the office that overlooks the assembly line and tells her what her job is. Then he sends her down. About an hour later the line leader comes up to the office and says, “Boss you gotta get this new girl off my line. She’s killing production.”
The boss looks down out of his...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

During the Japanese Occupation, a Malay, a Chinese and an Indian are captured by the Japanese army

The soldiers who capture them bring them to a forest, where they are told to pick 10 of the same fruits and to bring it back to them.

The Malay returns first, with ten rambutans. When he returns, an officer says: "I will stuff these ten rambutans into your anus; make a sound and I will kill y...

When you’re trying to find a guy with ticklish nuts

It takes a lot of test tickles

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Tickle your ass with a feather?

A homeless man is sitting on curb across from a bar. He watches a man across the way speaking to every woman who passes by. Eventually, he leaves with one of the women.  The next day, the same thing happens.  The next day, the homeless man inquires about the man’s secret. “Every woman who passes by,...

My mum got really annoyed when I tried to tickle my little sister's feet...

she said something about 'waiting till she was born'.

I built a machine that tickles you.

I have been asking people to try it. But nobody seems to want to try some test tickles.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Jazz Pianist

An Michelin star restaurant is looking for a pianist to entertain customers while they dine. The owner has been auditioning for weeks, but has had no luck finding someone suitable. One day, a guy called John comes in and says "Hi there, I'm here about the pianist position."

The manager repli...

How many tickles does it take to confirm your identity?

Just 2 test tickles.

What do you get when you tickle Chuck Norris?

Chuckle Norris.

My dating profile says I’m an adrenaline junky who laughs in the face of danger and my hobbies include walking on thousands of blades bare footed for fun. I just love the way the blades tickle my feet and there is no way I’m going to be stopped

by a “Keep off the Grass” sign.

What do you call a group of people that run around and tickle people?

A Gucci Gucci Gang

Wondering if they're ticklish?

Test-tickles are a great place to start.

Are you ready for a bone-afide good story that will definitely tickle your funny bone?

In a land far far away, lives a locksmith. This locksmith however, has two very special traits. One, he is an undead skeleton retired from being a lowly exp grind mob, and two, is able to open any lock. His skills are unrivaled, but when even he is stumped, he can detach one of his bones to utilize ...

A man takes a job at a you factory

He is hired on to work the production line for Tickle me Elmo. He settles into his position, is given a quick set of instructions by his new supervisor and set to work. After finishing the instructions, the supervisor says: "It's super easy. Let me know if you have any questions. I'm check back in ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old farmer is known across the state for his giant pumpkins.

An old farmer is known across the state for his giant pumpkins.

Every year he takes the blue ribbon at the state fair for biggest pumpkin, and every year his town throws a Pumpkin Parade for him where he drives the winner down Main Street in the back of his pickup, the local marching band pla...

How do you tell if a girl is ticklish? You give her two test tickles

I will see myself out. Thank you and have a good day

Three sisters decided to get married on the same day to save their parents the expense of separate weddings.

As a further step to reduce the price tag, the three sisters resolved to spend their honeymoon night at home. Later that night, their mother couldn’t sleep, so she went to the kitchen for a cup of tea. On her way, she tiptoed by her oldest daughter’s bedroom and heard her screaming. The mother thou...

(My favorite joke for my 2 year old daughter) What's the difference between an octopus and a squid?

A squid has TEN-TICKLES!
(Proceeds to tickle her and go "EEEEE!")

Sorry if this is a repost

What did the cow say when the chicken tried to tickle her?

"I'm not in the MOOOOOOOd!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man was having problems with premature ejaculation. This was affecting marital relations with his wife so he decided to go to the doctor. He asked the doctor what he could do to cure his problem.

In response the doctor said, “When you feel the urge to ejaculate, try startling yourself.”

On the way home the man went to a gun store and bought himself a starter pistol. All excited to try out this suggestion he ran home to his wife. When he got home he was surprised and delighted to find...

How do you make a juggler laugh?

You tickle his balls

Fishing tickle

In the window of a hardware store was a sign inscribed 'Fishing Tickle.'

A customer drew the proprietor's attention to the spelling. 'Hasn't anyone told you of it before?' asked the customer.

'Oh, yes,' the proprietor responded placidly, 'many have mentioned it. But whenever they come ...

I tickled my friend while he was driving.

We wrecked and he died.

I was charged with vehicular man’s laughter.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A little tickle...

One day a drunk was sitting next to a corner. A guy standing on the corner said to an attractive woman "Tickle your ass with a feather?". The woman, offended, said "What did you say!?". The man says "Particularly nice weather", and the woman went along her way.

As the drunk watched, the man d...

Whats white, round and giggles ?

A tickled onion.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Different sayings same thing

1. Having a threesome with a couple of no-shows.

2. DJ the VJ.

3. Dopamine farming.

4. Double clicking your mouse.

 5. Badgering the witness.

6. Summoning the semen demon.

7. Blood bending.

8. Shaking hands with the unemployed.

9. Making Jesus ...

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