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Yuk Jokes

I once was bored so I decided to eat a clock to *pass the time*.

It was very *time consuming*.


Yuk yuk yuk yuk yuk

Is that a tuna roll in your pocket, or are you just happy sashimi

yuk yuk yuk

My sister bet me a hundred dollars I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti.

You should've seen the look on her face as I drove pasta... Yuk yuk yuk

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A blonde is walking on a path...

she sees a piece of dog poop on the ground. She bends down, dips her finger in it and tastes it.

"Yuk, its poop."

Then she moves on thinking, "Thank God I didn't step on it."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks in to the patent office with an apple and sets it on the counter and says...

...."I want to patent this apple", the patent officer says "That's just an apple you can't patent that", the man says "Oh, but this is a special apple. It taste like pussy.", patent officer looks confused and the man says "go ahead take a bite". The patent officer plucks up the apple and takes a b...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Coming into the bar and ordering a double, the man leaned over and confided to the bartender, “I’m so pissed off!”

“What happened?” asked the bartender politely.

“See, I met this beautiful woman who invited me back to her home. We stripped off our clothes and jumped into bed and we were just about to make love when her goddamned husband came in the front door. So I had to jump out of the bedroom window an...

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