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Teens Jokes

A young blonde girl in her late teens, wanting to earn some extra money for the summer, decided to hire herself out as a "handy woman" and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood.

She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had
any odd jobs for her to do. "Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint the
porch" he said. "How much will you charge me?"


Delighted, the girl quickly responded,
"How about $50?"

...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A family with two teens checks into a hotel.

The father goes to the front desk and says "I hope the porn is disabled."


  

The guy at the desk replies. "It's just regular porn you sick bastard."

How many teens does it take to change a light bulb

1, they stand there and wait for the world to revolve around them

You can say what you will about Cis Teens

But they can sure make a nice chapel

I’ve been killing rich parents, throwing spiders at nerdy teens, dumping acid on kids, and calling disabled people mutants.

I haven’t created a superhero yet, but it better happen soon because I need to be stopped.

What do you call a group of depressed teens?

A hangout

Cop pulls up next to two teens in a dark parking spot.

He is surprised to find they are sitting there, literally just reading.

"Why are you reading? How old are you?"

"I'm 19 officer."

"And her?"

"Oh, she'll be 18 in 20 minutes."

What motivates teens to protest climate change?

They're doing it for the Greta good.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man suffering from severe headaches since his late teens decides to see a doctor

The doctor promptly begins examining him and says: "Well the good news is I can cure your headaches, the bad news is that it will require castration.

"What?" The man exclaims. "There must be some other way".

"Unfortunately not sir. You have a very rare condition which causes your testi...

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Halloween teens Party

A young boy walks into a Halloween teen party with no shirt on, only wearing a pair of loose jeans.

The host says, “Well, , this is a costume party.”

The young boy responds, “I’m in costume. I’m a premature ejaculation.”

The host asks, “how’s that?”

“I just came in my pan...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a creepy old guy who hangs out at malls, and has sex with under age teens?

In Alabama, your Honor, but soon it will be "Senator".

So I've heard there's a heroin epidemic among white teens...

I guess they're used to shooting up to solve their problems

Three teens are granted a wish each..

Nothing special happens, they all just wish you'd leave them alone.

What’s something pregnant teens and their fetuses have in common?

They both think “mom is gonna kill me”

Teens these days often forget to practice safe eating

Always use condiments

The other day, I read that 40 percent of teens have tried drugs in school...

That was a hard pill to swallow.

19 early teens went to a cinema to watch a dirty movie...

... they said "let us in, we're over 18".

Why did Harry Potter suddenly go bald in his teens?

He lost his Hedwig

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Alright class. Today, we're going to educate all teens about safe sex.

Or E.A.T.A.S.S for short

The percent of the population holding anti-vaccination beliefs has gotten up to the mid-teens.

Unlike their children.

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I was checking into a hotel with my family and given that my sons are in their teens...

I murmured to the receptionist: "Is the porn channel disabled?"

"No," she snarled, "it's the regular kind, you sick fuck!"

What do you call it when a school is made for Tumblr teens?

Edgy-cation....



I’m sorry

A Jewish father was very upset with how his son was turning out

He went to the Rabbi to ask him for some advice. He said, "Rabbi, I'm very worried about my son, I gave him the best possible Jewish education and despite this, he's now in his teens and is becoming a Christian!"

The Rabbi said, "it's funny you should say that, I too had a son who I raised t...

I'm 37 years old, a husband, and a father of two pre-teens AND I don't tell Dad jokes...

because he left when I was 2.

I saw a news story about teens getting high while washing in the shower...

They said it was leading to harder drug use and a real slippery soap.

What happened when the Eskimo teens went clubbing?

They got new fur coats.

Why is Leo DiCaprio soo good at Black Jack?

He always hits on teens and never goes over 21.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I always say to teens that sex is never the answer....

Sex is the question. The answer is yes!

A disturbing but true story about me

When I was born, my mother died and my father abandoned me. So I spent my entire childhood with my aunt and uncle.

When I was in my late teens, I stumbled upon a video that my sister had made of herself. It was then that I realized that she was really, really hot. I watched the video twice, a...

We all know that seven ate nine... We were even more disgusted to hear that seven was a six offender... It turns out that the most infamous number didn’t stop there...

Seven cut four teens in half!

I cringe when teens brag about taking girls to pound town

because adopting a puppy together is a huge responsibility.

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Did you hear the horror story about the teens having sex on a camping trip?

It was fucking in tents!

A drunk white guy swerves and hits 2 black teens walking down the sidewalk

One went through the windshield, the other was flung 50 yards away.

When the police show up, they charge the first kid with breaking and entering and the other with fleeing the scene of a crime.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Teen drug bust

Two teens are busted by the cops for possession of narcotics. Their day in court rolls around and the judge says to them:
"I'd hate to throw two young men in prison for a half-dozen years for something like this. I'll give you a week to convince as many people as you can to never do drugs and I'...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

(Nsfw)Went to pornhub the other day there was a lot of videos titled "bbc destroys teen"...

I don't know why the British Broadcasting Corporation is destroying the lives of teens..but I for one think it shows lack of journalistic integrity.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between a fitness blog and a porn site?

One's all about proteins, whilst the other is more about amateur teens

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