Swiss Cheese Jokes

Swiss cheese has lots of holes. The more holes you have,the less cheese you have. The more cheese you have,the more holes you have. Thus,the more cheese you have,the less cheese you have.

... calling it Hole Foods.

It’s the holiest of cheeses.

Because it’s holey

My 8 year old just told me this one…

Holy Guacamole!

It's the way it's always holier than thou.

But the joke has too many holes.



I know that was a cheesy joke. Most people aren't really that fondu of them. It's rare for them to be gouda jokes. You may think of me as a muenster for these jokes, and that I could do cheddar than this. I mean no parm in these puns. Alright, I'm done... read more

Because it’s “holy”


Used this as an actual dad joke. Daughter/wife not impressed

and sits by the mousetrap with baited breath.

But Swiss cheese is holy.

Swiss cheese, after all it's the holeist!

Swiss cheese. Why? Cuz it’s hole-y!

A young, poor boy approaches a cheesemaker.

"Sir, I am very hungry. I am willing to clean your entire cheese shop for a pound of cheddar. "

The cheesemaker thinks for a moment, decides, and nods. "Forthwith!"

The little boy grabs a broom and vigilantly begins cleaning. ... read more

This beautiful morning, the Pope woke early, excited for today's ceremony. It was a special day, and the Vatican will probably be even more crowded than usual. Standing there on the balcony and speaking to such a great audience is the purest joy of the Pope, second only to his closeness to God.
<... read more

One is Vatican City, the other is Switzerland.


No wonder Swiss cheese is holy.

What do you call a cool mushroom?...A fun guy!!!

A neutron walks into a bar. "I'd like a beer" he says. The bartender promptly serves up a beer. "How much will that be?" asks the neutron. "For you?" replies the bartender, "no charge"

A guy walks into a restaurant, and takes a seat. Acr... read more