UPJOKE
cheesecamembertmilkfrancecurdbriochegruyerecroissantgorgonzolacheddarfontinastiltonprosciuttobaguettechevre

Sweet dreams are made of cheese

Who am I to diss-a-Brie? I cheddar the world and the feta cheese, everybody’s looking for Stilton.
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Sweet dreams are made of cheese

Who am I to disabrie?
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My uncle was injured in an explosion at the cheese factory today.

He was hit by a chunk of da Brie
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Did you hear about the cheese factory in France that exploded ?

There was nothing left but de brie
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I really hate when people get brie confused with similar cheeses.

I camembert it.
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A list of puns

Here's a list of puns I've been collecting:

How do you throw a space party? You planet.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

Nope. Unintended.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention, but everyone was blow away by the leaf blower.

A scarecrow says,...

A bomb just went off in a paris cheese shop

There is de brie everywhere!
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What kind of cheese did OceanGate serve on its sub?

The Brie
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Alison Brie, Anna Kendrick, and Keira Knightley play a game of strip poker. Who wins?

The internet
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what’s it called when someone who’s lactose intolerant still likes eating cheese?

BrieDSM
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What Queen song does a fraudulent cheesemaker sing?

I want to fake Brie.
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I put way too much cheese in my omelet this morning...

I needed to take a brie-ther afterwards.
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I once got kicked out of a Depeche Mode after show party for eating Dave Gahan's Brie and Stilton.

Apparently they were his own personal cheeses.
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Current political meetings

Ministers said to have considered three options during yesterday's cabinet meeting, thought to be Stilton, Wensleydale and Brie.
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What do you call an actor who steals cheese?

Brie Larson
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A cheese factory exploded recently..

...Unfortunately, nothing could be salvaged except for de-brie.
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Saw a great offer on cheese in Tesco today

It was buy one get one brie
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What do you call it when someone inhaled cheese?

Brie-thing
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France's's National Cheese Museum just blew up

Over five hundred people were injured by de brie
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Last night rioters destroyed the famous Etampes Cheese Market in Paris

All that was left was de-Brie
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Did you know that music is often used to help advance in the fermentation of cheese.

The most popular genre in use today is R & Brie.
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do scrap salvagers like cheese so much?

Because they sort through de-brie to earn some cheddar.

I went to a cheese factory the other day, but there was a massive explosion.

There was de *brie* everywhere.



Sorry, too *cheesy*?
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What's Captain Marvel's favorite cheese

Brie.
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What's the difference between a man working in an imitation cheese factory and Freddie Mercury?

The first man wants to fake brie.
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People keep telling me I'm mature for my age

I don't really feel like I am, but I guess I must brie
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Did you hear about the explosion at the cheese factory in France?

De-brie was everywhere.

Following the incident the owner of the factory, monseuir francois was asked his thoughts in an interview.

He merely said

"ehh-Damn!"
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What type of music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did ya hear? Captain Marvel got caught stealing soft French cheese...

It was Brie Larseny

Did you guys hear about the explosion at the cheese factory?

Da brie was everywhere!

It’s going to cost them a lot of cheddar!

Luckily they have a Swiss account saved up.

It surely won’t be gouda.

It even destroyed their onsite cottage!
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When John Lennon was a boy,

his best friend was a chubby lad named Winston - but because of Winston’s penchant for stuffing his face with Stilton, Red Leicester, Cheddar or Brie, naturally he was nicknamed “Cheese”.
One hot summer day, a gang of friends decided to head off to the local quarry to cool off in the water. The...
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[BREAKING NEWS] A bomb has just exploded in a Paris cheese shop.

Eyewitnesses report there is currently de Brie all over the place.
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What's the difference between an open box of stinky cheese and a Kung Fu master?

One is loose brie and the other is Bruce Lee
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why does the mafia always refer to money as cheddar

brie cause its gouda
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Why couldn't they find the cheesemaker after the accident?

He was trapped under da-Brie!
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Is there a name for a gang of cheeses?

Posse-brie
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Did you hear of the french guy that got drunk on cheese?

The police told me he was ine*brie*ated
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My younger brother took his life 3 years ago. Always a comedian, here’s his cheesiest joke

Farmesan the dairy farmer is feeling bleu because of a string of falls he's been suffering. He calls up his doctor, Dr. Edam JaColby, and tells him "Doc, I'm in so much paineer!"and schedules an appointment. So Farmesan carephilly stumbles over to the clinic. "You mozzarella needed to see me cause y...
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I thought making cheese was hard.

But it was a brie-eze.
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Sweet dreams

My father used to tell me that to have a good night's sleep, he must insult dairy products, but he always felt it wasn't his place to yell at cheeses.

I never questioned him until one day I couldn't stand it anymore and asked him why he felt that way

He looked me in the eye and said: "...
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An old man in Brooklyn gets a phone call that his cheese shop blew up.

“Oh, no! I’d better get down there right away!”

The guy on the phone tells him, “Nah, take your time. All that’s left where de shop was is de brie.”
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