I've been doing my psychology PhD thesis on the mental health and wellbeing of little people. After 4 long years and multiple studies, I've concluded...

6 out of 7 dwarves aren't Happy.

Studies have shown that cigarettes can harm children...

...may need to start using an ashtray.

This girl in my museum studies class said she likes touching old things.

I want to make this a good semester for her.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the head on a man's penis is larger than the shaft.

The study took two years and cost over 1.2 million pounds. It concluded that the reason the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the man with more pleasure during sex.

After the results were published, France decided to conduct their own study on the same subject. The...

A child of age 7, was never allowed to leave home. Not for games, not even for studies. Most of the world was unknown to him.

One day, playing near the window, he saw an elephant in their cabbage farming eating away at their cabbages. The child went running to his Mom with fear and curiosity in his eyes

"Mom there is a huge creature on our farm! I saw it grabbing cabbages with its tail but ..
I couldn't understan...

If a biologist studies biology and a nutritionist studies nutrition

Trump must be an expert at studying races.

Studies have shown that American youth has already started using the metric system

Nowadays you can even find students from various schools in America using 9mm

What do you call a wolf that studies philosophy?

A self-aware wolf.

PSA do not wear a washington wizards face mask.

CDC studies have shown they provide no defense

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Studies suggest that masturbation is twice as effective as sex for dealing with stress.

So one in the hand really is worth 2 in the bush

An arsonist lights an economist's house on fire.

When the economist arrives home, he turns on the garden hose in his front yard and sprays a huge blast of water on the fire. This completely puts out the fire, but now a section of the house is covered in water.

The next day, the arsonist lights a chemist's house on fire.

When the chem...

Studies show that sarcastic people die younger than the average person.

That’s just great.

Cows are amazing

Studies show that cows produce more milk when the farmers talk to them.

It's a case of in one ear and out the udder.

Studies reveal that some doctors purposely mistreat people they find annoying with many cases resulting in death.

It's another classic case of doctors losing their patients.

What do you call it if a jackdaw catches Coronavirus?

Crowvid-19

Here's the thing. This joke depends on the idea that a "jackdaw is a crow."
Is it in the same family? Yes. No one's arguing that.

As someone who is a scientist who studies crows, I am telling you, specifically, in science, no one calls jackdaws crows. If you want to be "s...

Studies suggest that parents can do 1/3 of their kids’ math assignments

However, they struggle with the other 3/4

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says,"I need you to come over and help me with this jigsaw puzzle..."

Her boyfriend asks,"What's it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says"According to the picture on the box it's supposed to be a rooster."So her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. When she lets him in she takes him to the table where she has all the pieces sprea...

Teacher: What's 4 + 5?

Marcus: I don't know

Teacher: You should focus on your studies

Marcus: Who's John?

Teacher: Who is John?

Marcus: You should focus on your wife

Scientific studies show that women who are overweight

Live significantly longer than the men who mention it.

Just a joke...please don't kill me

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My friend, who studies mice, wanted a specific rodent to complete his collection.

He asked me to find one for him. I searched far and wide for a homosexual rodent of the Ming subspecies (that was his request).

After a few months, I found a rodent that matched his request. But when I gave it to him, he slapped me.

I was shocked. "Why did you slap me?", I asked out of...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Car or Haircut

A young boy had just gotten his driver's permit and enquired of his father, if they could discuss his use of the car. His father said, "I'll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little, get your hair cut and we'll talk about the car."
Well, t...

My dad threw every social studies book away except one

It was history...

Did you know that a very good memory is often a sign of an excellent lover?

I read that on February 11, 2017 in the New England Journal of Behavioral studies issue 2016-Q3.

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