Senior Shoplifter

A cranky older woman "in her senior years" was arrested for shoplifting at a grocery store. She gave everyone a hard time, from the store manager to the security guard to the arresting officer who took her away. She complained and criticized everything and everyone throughout the process.

Whe...

I gotta say I'm impressed with shoplifters

Those are heavy

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do old people and shoplifters have in common?

They both leave stores with more shit in their pants than they came in with.

Despite not being a shoplifter, I know what goes through their heads.

"I'm not buying it."

I have the Award for Shoplifter of the Year!

I didn't win it...

It's hard to explain puns to shoplifters.

They always take things literally.

Grover the Grocer and the Shoplifter

Grover the grocer ran a comfortable business, with one recurring malady--a persistent shoplifter named Gwen. Grover knew she was robbing him blind, but couldn't seem to catch her in the act.

This continued for quite a number of years until, as fortune would have it, one day he caught her redh...

Breaking News

Local police are seeking a shoplifter who attacked a store this lunch time but was tackled by a have-a-go shopkeep with his labelling gun.

Officers say they're seeking a man with a price on his head.

- RIP Ronnie Corbett.

The priceless moments of my LIFE.

\~a shoplifter

I just got a ladder in my tights.

I truly am a talented shoplifter

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