UPJOKE
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I’ve developed a fetish for figuring things out.

I just came to that realization.

I just came to the realization,

Obesity is a growing problem.

I've come to the realization that suicide would solve all my problems...

... if I could just get the right people to try it.

When Beethoven passed away, he was buried in a churchyard

A couple days later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some strange noise coming from the area where Beethoven was buried. Terrified, the drunk ran and got the priest to come and listen to it. The priest bent close to the grave and heard some faint, unrecognizable music comin...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A ship goes down at sea

Two survivors wash up on the shore of an island--a man and a Chihuahua.
The only other inhabitants of the island are harmless native sheep that roam and feed aimlessly on the lush grass. Conditions are primitive, but the man and Chihuahua coexist peacefully for several years.
The man event...

I have come to a profound realization

And I really need to clean up

I have come to the realization that I am, in fact, a man trapped inside a woman's body…

In retrospect, I probably shouldn’t have put the lube next to the glue…

Got stoned once when I had a sudden realization:

I shouldn't have broken the law in Saudi Arabia!

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