If money can't buy happiness.

I don't want it.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Happiness is like pissing yourself

Haven’t felt it since I was 5.

What do you call a meme that provokes intense happiness

Dope-a-meme

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The five secrets to happiness (a Man’s guide):

1. Find a woman who can make you laugh

2. Find a woman who can cook

3. Find a woman who really listens to you

4. Find a woman who is good in bed

5. Make sure these four women do not find out about each other

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A couples therapist believes the amount of sex you have is directly related to happiness, so he decides to test his theory at his next seminar.

He addresses the crowd in attendance and asks "How many couples here tonight have sex once a day?"

To the therapists delight, about half of the crowd raise their hands with wide, toothy grins across their faces.

The therapist then asks "How many have sex once a week?"

Roughly a ...

Money cant buy you happiness.

But I'd rather have my tears hit designer Bugatti leather than the composite foam in my car.

Happiness is like peeing in your pants....

I haven't experienced it since I was eight.

They say money doesn't buy happiness

but money could buy me some yachts and that would at least give me some *fleet*ing joy

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A few days ago, my friend compared me to a Happy Meal, Her reasoning was that i'm cute and a bundle of happiness.

I thought that that was interesting, because I also cum with a toy.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I told my therapist about being unhappy, he said, "When it comes to happiness, a good analogy is a 3D-printer."

"Oh," I said, "You mean that I should make my own happiness?"

"No," he said. "I meant, most people don't have it, and many don't even know what it is."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A sex therapist decides to test out the theory that more frequent sex leads to more happiness

So he tests it at a seminar by asking those assembled, “How many people here make love once a day?”
A third of the people in the room raise their hands, each of them grinning widely, big smiles. “Once a week?” A third of the audience members raise their hands, their grins a bit less vibrant. “Onc...

What's the difference between a dictionary and life?

You can find happiness in the dictionary

A man doesn't know what true happiness is until he's married....

And then it's too late.

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness.

Has never paid for a divorce before.

Dan always used to say"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married.

Then it was too late.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Discovery of happiness

(English is not my first language, so I apologize in advance for any spelling/grammat mistakes xP)

A scientist, after many years of study managed to mathematically prove that having regular sex is the key to happiness. So, he decides to set up a conference, in which many people curious of his...

After five years of living in utter despair, a young man finally found the key to lifelong happiness.

It was Prozac.

Some people create happiness wherever they go.

Others, whenever they go.

Money doesn't buy happiness

But I would rather cry in a Rolls Royce than on a bicycle

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Life is like a guy with premature ejaculation

A lot of anxiety, frustration and disappointment for small moments of happiness

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.