A sales guy rings the doorbell on a house, and the door is opened by a 12 year old, holding a glass of cognac and smoking a cigar
The sales guy is a bit stunned, but plows forward and asks, "Is your dad home?"
The kid replies, "What the fuck do you think?"
Snow plows
On a bitterly cold winter morning a husband and wife in Dublin were listening to the radio during breakfast. They heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so the snow ploughs can get through." So the ...
A doctor goes out and buys the best car on the market, a brand new Ferrari GTO. It is also the most expensive car in the world, and it costs him $500,000. He takes it out for a spin and stops at a red light.
An old man on a moped, looking about 100 years old, pulls up next to him.
The old man looks over at the sleek shiny car and asks, “What kind of car ya got there, sonny?”
The doctor replies, “A Ferrari GTO. It cost half a million dollars!”
“That’s a lot of money,” says the old ma...
A husband and wife were relaxing at home when all of a sudden it started to snow...
Their show was interrupted by a news broadcast instructing everyone to park on the west side of the street to allow the snow plows to run. The woman jumps up and grabs her keys to move her car immediately. The next night the snow is still unrelenting and the broadcast instructs everyone to p...
Arthur was looking outside as the snow begin to fall,
and his wife, Martha, yelled from the other room "They said on the radio we need to park on the odd side of the street for the plows tonight!"
"Ok, I'll move the car then!" and he moved the car to the odd side of the street.
A few nights later another snow storm was due. "Arthur, the ...
A couple live outside Buffalo, and are used to the rhythms of preparing for large snows.
One of these preparations for many years has been tuning in to the local radio station at 6:00 the night before a storm for an important announcement.
On a typical pre-storm night, the wife would tune in just prior to 6 to hear a message about which side of the street cars were to be parked o...
I drive like my brother
I’m driving with this guy, and he runs right through a Stop sign. So I say, “Hey, that was a Stop sign.” And he says, “I drive like my brother!”
A few blocks later, he plows right through a red light. I say, “You just ran a red light.” And he says, “I drive like my brother!”
So now we’...
A blonde in her Corvette convertible passes a policeman at high speed.
He immediately flips on his lights and gives chase. She careens at a corner and knocks over a mailbox, then jumps the sidewalk sending pedestrians scrambling for safety. She gets back onto the road and approaches a red light with traffic stopped, but swerves into the opposite lane crossing the doubl...
Safety in Snowplows
A blond gets into her car while an incredibly powerful winter storm surrounds her. She starts the car and puts it in drive when suddenly her anxiety sets in. The horrible weather begins to worry her; she fears that she won't ever get home in it.
It's at this time (and through a stroke of luc...
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