What do you call it when a cow pleasures himself?

Some say MOOsterbation, but Iโ€™ve always been partial to Beef Strokinoff.

Top 5 mom's punishments that have become pleasures:

Top 5 mom's punishments that have become pleasures:



1. "Go to sleep NOW"

2. "Eat ALL YOUR FOOD"

3. "You will not leave the house"

4. "Go to your room!"

5. "One more word and I'll spank that ass"

What do you call a woman who pleasures herself with a vegetable?

Mrs Hawking.

A french man and his wife go shopping in America

As they are walking down the aisles, she is placing items in bags for them to buy. He is mindlessly walking behind her while she does so, he is missing the simple pleasures of France.
She stops and looks at her husband and holds up a loaf of bread. "Honey, do we need bread? Should I put it in a ...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

What do you call a man who cries while he pleasures himself?

A tearjerker.

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

โ€œThat man is richest whose pleasures are cheapest.โ€ -Henry David Thoreau

Masturbation

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

A large discussion is held about a car manufacturer coaxing young Mr. Bating while he pleasures himself.

Mass debating Mazda bating masturbating Master Bating

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

One of life's greatest pleasures is watching your wedding video backwards...

It starts off with lots of sex in a far flung exotic country.

Then you move on to a massive party, surrounded by your family and your best friends, getting drunk and having a great time.

Then you take off that ring, walk back down the aisle, leave the church, and go back to the pub wit...

Name a girl who pleasures herself with a vegetable?

Steven Hawking's wife

The Priest: "All sinful pleasures lead to hell my child"

Me: "I guess Hell will be a godamn party hall, sign me up"

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