UPJOKE
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Missionaries.

A priest and a nun are traveling across the Sahara on a missionary trip when the camel they were traveling on died, falling and crushing their water supply. The priest looks at the young, attractive nun and thinks "If we are to die in the service of our lord, surely he will forgive an old man one in...

I was talking to the anorexic cannibal..

I told him self-indulgence isn't the answer and he needs to face his problems.

He threw up his arms and walked away.

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3 guys in Heaven

3 guys get into Heaven. An angel greets them.
"Welcome to Heaven. You can have anything you want in here EXCEPT for your #1 indulgence when you were living on Earth. We may test your willpower so be careful."

The first guy was a huge classic car collector.
The second guy was ...

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Voodostick

Don't know if you guys have heard this one but here goes:

Once upon a time there was a witch who was quite the nympho. All waking moment was spent in all manners of sexual indulgence. Her favourite was to play with toys of all kinds.

Then one day she simply grew tired of them all. ...

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