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Peter Pan Jokes

Peter Pan would make a great comedian

His jokes would never get old

Why is Peter Pan always flying?

He neverlands

You really should upvote this joke because it never gets old

Why didn’t Peter Pan’s career in stand-up take off?

Because his jokes Neverland.

Where does Peter Pan like to eat out?

Wendy’s.

I'm done making Peter Pan jokes

They Never land

Why is Peter Pan always flying?

Because he can Neverland.

A good metaphor for today's youth is the book Peter Pan...

Kids sneak out. Get high on dust together. Beat up handicapped man, and steal his boat.

What's Peter Pan's favorite place to eat out?

Wendy's

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Given that Wendy has a crush on Peter Pan, I guess you can say....

She's Pansexual.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why can't Peter Pan be grounded?

You: Because he Neverlands.

Me: No. It's because he's a fucking orphan.

I read a joke about an alternate ending to Peter Pan where Captain Hook wins the duel and sends Peter Pan back to London in a body bag.

Not very funny and quite dark, but it requires a dead Pan delivery

What is Bill Cosby’s favorite Peter Pan themed cereal?

Roofie-Os

What's Peter Pan's brother's name?

Peter Pot.
He gets so high he never lands.

No one ever talks about Peter Pans brother.

Peter Pots

Why is Peter Pan always flying?

because he neverlands!

jkjk it's cuz of the pixie dust. tinker Bell is his slave, #freetink

What do anti vaxxers kids have in common with Peter Pan?

They never grow old.

In 1985, new wave band, A-Ha, wrote a song for a new Broadway version of Peter Pan that was never used. In the musical, Tinkerbell was supposed to sing to Peter, urging him to try and fight Captain Hook’s right hand man with the intent of demoralizing Hook and his pirate crew...

Taaaaake oooooon Smeeeee

Why is Peter Pan on the No-Fly list?

Whenever he boards a plane it neverlands

What's Peter pans favourite fast food restaurant?

Wendy's

I asked Peter Pan how Captain Hook would vent his frustration.

"Beat Smee," he replied.

"Oh, sorry." I said. "I thought you'd know."

What does Pittsburgh have in common with Peter Pan?

The Pirates always lose.

Peter Pan and Captain Hook agree to a truce. (LONG)

After years upon years of fighting, kidnapping/fairynapping, and pilfering, the two rivals decide to agree to a truce, as both are realizing that their hearts are no longer in the fight. They agree that Pan and the Lost Boys will stay mostly on the mainland, and Hook and the Pirates will stay out to...

In 1969, the Beatles originally wrote one of their hit songs for a Broadway version of Peter Pan. Captain Hook’s right hand man wanted to Broker a truce that would give Hook the ability to fly and give Peter and the Lost Boys safety from pirates. It ended with a big event where Hook and Peter flew..

Come together, right now... over Smee.

Why did Peter Pan know he could beat Captain Hook in poker?

Peter knew Captain Hook had lost at least one hand.

We should start calling unvaccinated kids Peter Pans...

They never get old.

What did Peter Pan call Tinkerbell when she corrected his spelling?

A Diction Fairy

What is another name for the tick-tock croc from Peter Pan?

A Clock-odile.

Why does nobody laugh at zombie-Peter Pan's jokes?

He always tells them with a dead Pan face.

Kevin Spacey as Peter Pan

Kevin Spacey has been offered the role of Peter Pan for his next film but some changes were required.

Now, to get to Neverland, he tells the 2nd star to his right to bend over til morning.

[Possibly OC] How excited was Wendy to go to Neverland?

She was so excited that she nearly Peter Pans.

What happened when Tinker Bell couldn't find a bathroom? [Original]

She Peter Pans

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The Birth of Baby Ruth

It was another Payday and I was tired of Mr. Goodbar. I saw Miss Hershey standing behind the Powerhouse on the corner of Clark and Fifth Avenue when I whipped out my Whopper and whispered, "Hey Sweetheart, how'd you like to Crunch on my big hunk for a Million Dollar Bar?"

Well, she immediate...

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Know what they call those specialty cake pans in the shape of penises?

Peter Pans

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Bob gets a job at a Japanese restaurant...

In the kitchen he notices all the pots, pans, plates, etc have names stamped on them. His boss says it's for easy identification.

One day the cook asks him to go get a wok. So Bob goes into the back and grabs the first thing he can find that resembles a wok with the name "Peter" in bold lette...

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