I asked my five year old daughter what she wanted for her birthday and she giggled, "I want unicorns, rainbows and fairies!"

Ok, LSD it is!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Daddy, I've just seen two fairies at the bottom of the garden

Humouring her I said, "Really, what were they doing?"

She said, "Sucking each other's cocks.

What does Donald Trump call small boats used by fairies?

Fey canoes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My daughter came sprinting in to the house yesterday shouting 'daddy, daddy, I just saw two fairies at the bottom of the garden!'

Humouring her I asked 'That's amazing darling, what were they doing?'

She replied 'Sucking each other's cocks'

Why don't fairies live under toadstools?

Because there's not mushroom!

What's the difference between fairies and angels

For some reason one is taken serious.

How many fairies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Well, only a few can fit in there at a time. So maybe two or three?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If I got a nickel everytime I said "I don't believe in fairies"

I wouldn't give two shits about fairies dying from it

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Leprechaun Thief

I met a Leprechaun once, in a pub in Ireland. He was just minding his own business when I sat down on the stool next to him and ordered my drink.

"Your favourite Stout, please.", i said to the bartender. The Leprechaun turned his head and sized me up.

"You're a proper lad", he quipped....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A teacher asks her class to name a word beginning with A

Little Jonny raises his hand and the teacher thinks "I'm not asking Jonny, he will say something like asshole". She asks Suzanna who says "Apple". The She asks for a word beginning with B. Again Jonny raises his hand and the teacher thinks "I'm not asking Jonny, he will say bastard", so she asks Ste...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.