How many woks would an ewok wash if ewoks could wash woks?

All of them,till the Endor time!

Quasimodo's mother returns from grocery shopping with, among the groceries, a large steel wok.

"Oh, mummy, this is wonderful," says Quasimodo. "I just love Chinese food!"

"It's not for cooking," says his mother, "it's for ironing your shirts."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the best date to take a pansexual on?

Take them out for a wok.

I want to open a restaurant that fuses Chinese and Middle Eastern cuisine

I call it "Wok like an Egyptian".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was on a blind date with a woman the other day when she told me that she was "Pansexual"

...so I said "That's not a problem with me, but I am curious what your preference is though...



skillets or woks?"

Did you hear about the new Chinese cookbook?

101 Ways To Wok Your Dog

A regional manager of a Chinese restaurant chain was visiting one of the stores around the holidays.

He was there to check how the store was doing, making sure safety protocols were in place, making sure it was clean, etc. Upon entering the restaurant he was greeted with Christmas decor, lights, garland, Santa clauses everywhere, and holiday music.
“What’s with the get up?” The manager asked. <...

I heard the ladies really like a good stir fry.

You can tell by the way I use my wok, I'm a woman's man.

My favorite Chinese food place is closed for COVID19.

The sign said they would wok from home.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a man cooking stir-fry in a Japanese technology company?

Sony wok man.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Her : So, I'm pansexual

Me : Wanna go for a wok?

TIL - While visiting China, Johnny Cash almost went to prison for cooking cocaine.

His original version of "I Wok The Line" was a very different song.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How is extra virgin olive oil NSFW ?

Not Safe For Wok.

\[yay dumbest joke of the day\]

What is a wok?

Something you throw at wabbits when you haven't got your wifle.

My girlfriend said she’s not a fan of Pan-Asian cooking

I thought it was called a Wok

What is Pac-Man’s favorite cooking utensil?

A wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok a wok

My sister bought my dad a wok....

he responded by saying, "but I already wok everywhere." I'm 31 years old and my dad is 66. I just want everyone to know that dad jokes never die and will always mean something to someone.

Did you ever hear about the mute Thai chef?

He could wok the wok but not talk the talk.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Boss Of The Body (not mine)

When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss.

The brain said, "I should be Boss because I control the whole body's responses and functions."

The feet said, "We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go."

The hands said, "We s...

Panda Express fired me for emailing around photos of bad stir fry...

I guess I should have labelled them Not Safe for Wok...

I was getting trained as a cook in a chinese restaurant

Well, it was really more of a wok through

My wife gave me some bad news today

"But," she said, "I bought your favorite soy sauce to help cheer you up."

"Great," I said. "Just Kikkoman when he's down, huh?"

I'm very soy for that pun. I'll just wok away now.

Before becoming Pop stars, the Bee Gees used to be professional chefs.

You could tell by the way they used their wok.

After purchasing an oval Chinese frying pan at the diminutive British aristocrat’s yard sale

Nigel realized that he’d just taken a long wok off a short Peer.

Is that a frying pan in the pantry?

No. It’s a wok in closet.

I went to a Chinese restaurant that is open 24/7, 365 days of the year...

... the chef is a wokaholic.

Did you hear about the duck and Chinese chef that teamed up to deal drugs?

They were slinging quack wok!

What do you call it when you make asian food in the jungle?

Taking a Wok on the wild side.

A baseball manager calls up a Chinese rookie from the minor leagues

The player shows up before his first game and goes to take batting practice. The manager sees him walking to the batter's box with a frying pan sitting on his head. He says "You can't wear a frying pan in the batter's box, son. You need a helmet."

The player responds: "This is my lucky frying...

Rock music and Cooking

Did you know the rock band Aerosmith wrote a Chinese cookbook?


It's called Wok This Way

A Chinese pan, an establishment for accommodation and drinks, a number, and Abraham Rockefeller...

Wok inn two Abe R.

What do Asian people sing to their children at night?

Wok a bye baby.

I asked 25 Pac-people what their favorite pan is and the results were overwhelming...

1) A wok

2) A wok

3) A wok

4) A wok

5) A wok

6) A wok

7) A wok

8) A wok

9) A wok

10) A wok

11) A wok

12) A wok

13) A wok

14) A wok

15) A wok

16) A wok

17) A wok

18) A wok

19)...

I broke my leg so I can't go to any Chinese restaurants

I can't wok

Now, most of us walk our dogs.

In China, they wok theirs.

How does the Chinese chef go to work?

He woks.

Why can't paraplegics cook Chinese food?

Because they can't "wok."

Note: May be cheesy and offensive, but I coined this joke when humor could be silly and irreverent, and y'all were begging for non-reposts.

Thanks to Uber Eats, ordering Chinese takeaway for a picnic is as easy as a

wok in the park.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Voodoo dildo

A man was going to go on a business trip and wanted to get his wife a new toy to try and reduce the chance that she would cheat on him while he was gone.

So he went to a local sex shop and told the clerk what he was looking for and why.

The clerk showed him a collection of dildos and...

What do you call Luke Skywalker's futuristic frying pan?

An e-wok

What’s the difference between an American dog and a Chinese dog?

The way you wok them.

Why is it hard to make chinese food?

Because it takes a lot of wok

Did you see Nicholas Sparks released a cookbook?

A Wok to Remember

Did you hear about the Catholic Sister who opened a Breaking Bad themed Asian restaurant?

She is the Nun who Woks.

I tried cooking Chinese spare ribs in the oven instead of the pan.

I'll tell you it was a walk in the park compared to the pork in the wok.

The Toaster leads the Kitchen Appliances on Strike. [LONG]

I looked around the kitchen in exasperation.

"We have will be heard! We have a voice! We have rights!"

"Umm, no you don't." I said to the speaker, "you're literally a wok."

"Well that may be, but we will not be abused any longer!"

A chorus of "Yeah," "You tell 'im!" and "...

What type of music do they play at Chinese Restaurants ?

Wok n' Roll

I hear the Star Wars universe is so advanced, you can get Chinese food directly over the internet...

They use an e-wok.

What does a one night stand and cooking bad Chinese food have in common?

Both end in a wok of shame

A muslim opens a stir-fry restaurant in Hawaï.

He called it "Aloha-Wok-bar".

Anyone know the title of Steven Tyler's new cook book?

Wok this way.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Bob gets a job at a Japanese restaurant...

In the kitchen he notices all the pots, pans, plates, etc have names stamped on them. His boss says it's for easy identification.

One day the cook asks him to go get a wok. So Bob goes into the back and grabs the first thing he can find that resembles a wok with the name "Peter" in bold lette...

Taking a stroll in the park is like robbing an Asian kitchen.

Either way, you're taking a wok.

I've been doing this new program called 'Cooking with Nature: Chinese Edition'

You'd think it would be tough, but it's just a wok in the park.

The Bangles are getting their own cooking show.

Wok Like an Egyptian

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I wanted to take a Chinese cooking class.

But looking into it, it seemed like too much wok.

What did the American Chef say to the Asian Chef?

Take a wok.

Why don't Chinese Restaurant owners do their dirty dishes?

Because it's too much wok! [Sorry, I just made that up!]

So I was at a book store the other day and I saw a Vietnamese cookbook...

It was called "How to Wok Your Dog".

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.