UPJOKE
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 Cent feat. Nickelback


Go ahead, down vote me to oblivion

Fire alarms should just play Nickelback

Anyone who stays in the building deserves what they get.

If I had a Nickel for every terrible Canadian rock band, I know I'd at least get a Nickelback.

I'll let myself out.

Racism is like Nickelback...

I like to joke about it, but I never want to see it live.

Some say that if you play Nickelback backwards you'll hear Satan.

Even worse, if you play it forwards you'll hear Nickelback.

what concert costs only 45¢?

50cent featuring Nickelback.

I forgot how much I hated Nickelback until you blasted their song on the radio...

And this is how you remind me?!!!

I owe my life to Nickelback

I got in a horrible car crash and was in 6 month coma. Then the nurse switched the song to Nickelback. I woke up and muted it.

Tom Brady retired, but he does so as the GOAT, with 7 Super Bowls, but more importantly, he’s 5x better than Nickelback.

…he’s a quarterback

I can't get over how cruel some people are.

I had some Nickelback tickets on the passenger seat of my car, and I popped into the shop for just five minutes.

When I came back, someone had smashed the window and left two more.

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If you get an email saying "click this link to hear Nickelback's new album for free" DO NOT CLICK IT

It will take you directly to a site where you can hear Nickelback's new album for free.

I hear that Chad Kroeger from Nickelback, absolutely loves to take part in Nativity plays. He's played a shepherd, the inn keeper and one year, he even played the rear end of the donkey...

But he never made it as a wise man

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Silver side up is Nickelback's best album

Especially when used as directed.

Tom Brady is 5 times better than Nickelback

He's a quarterback

I bought Nickelback's greatest hits

And it was just a blank CD.

What does a brewery and a Nickelback concert have in common?

They are both responsible for a lot of boos.

I just overheard a co-worker announce she got tickets to a Nickelback concert.

That's all, she was completely serious.

What you should say to anti-maskers

You’re being asked to wear a mask, not a Nickelback teeshirt, relax

So I’m dating this girl, called magnesium hydroxide, she likes fairy lights, nickelback and pumpkin spiced lattes...

Yeah she is pretty basic.

Hillary Clinton and Nickelback are on a boat and it capsizes, who survives?

America

How does the lead singer of Nickelback prove his identity?

"Look at this photograph"

What's a poor gorilla called?

A nickelback.

Given inflation...

...when does Nickelback become Dimeback?

Music can take you places.

For example, Nickelback started playing, so now I'm going to a different cafe

The community theater recently posted auditions for Aladdin and a Christmas play

On audition day, local news reporter Thi Xix Hao spotted someone crying outside the audition room.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

The dejected man looked up. “You look familiar” he said.

“I am local news reporter, Thi Xix Hao. You also look familiar to me”

“I am Chad Kroeger, ...

What is the worst stage of grief?

Any stage where Nickelback is performing

I can't believe how many of Nickelback songs have never become famous

It's completely off the charts.

What do you call a rock group of 4 men who don't sing or play music?

Mount Rushmore.


^^Or ^^Nickelback. ^^I'm ^^so ^^sorry.

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Have you guys heard the secret about butter?

I don't want to tell you because you might spread it around...

BONUS:

What concert is cheaper than 50 cents to attend?

50 Cent feat. Nickelback

*BUHDUMCHHH*

30 Seconds To Mars for only 5 Seconds Of Summer?

I'd better get my Nickelback or there'll Panic! At The Disco.

What do you call it when you return 5 cents to someone who dropped it?

Nickelback

I bought a 2000's Boy band online for only five cents, but it never came in the mail.

I want my Nickelback

What happens when you remove 90% talent from 50 cent?

You get a Nickelback

What's worse than a plastic bag filled with dead babies?

Nickelback

A man walks into a music store.

A man walks into a music store to buy a record for his father. As he approaches the counter with his record he notices that the clerk has put out Nickelback CDs next to the register with a tag thats reads "CD special, $0.05 no returns."

The man looks at the clerk and says " $0.05 for a Nickel...

What did the person with horrible music taste say to the person who stole their coin?

Hey can I have my nickelback?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Phil dies and is met by the Devil in front of three doors.

The Devil takes him to one side. 'Look, Phil,' he says, 'we're trying something out to cut down on admin down here. We used to assign punishments to the damned that fit their sins, but now we're letting people choose themselves.'

He gestures to the three doors. 'What I can do for you is this:...

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