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Two kinds of nerds:

May the force be ____________

a. equal to mass times acceleration.

b. with you.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many kinds of boobs are there

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?” The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hangi...

there are five kinds of people in the world.

those who can count and those who can't

A global crisis broke out, affecting every nation and people of all kinds

In response, the world banded together and quickly solved the problem through mutual cooperation and understanding

A lady walks into a drug store and tells the pharmacist she needs some cyanide.

The pharmacist said, Why in the world do you need cyanide?
The lady then explained she needed it to poison her husband.

The pharmacist's eyes got big and he said, Lord have mercy, I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband! That's against the law! I'll lose my license, they will throw b...

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Three women have just entered heaven

Three women have just entered heaven, and are standing in front of an angel and St. Peter to find out what kinds of special privileges they'll have while there. He says to the women, "I only have one question. Have you lived a chaste life?"

The first woman answers "I have only had sex with on...

There are two kinds of people.

People who divide people into two kinds of people and people who don’t.

There are two kinds of people in the world.

Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data

There are II kinds of people

Those who understand Roman numerals and those who don't

There are 2.000000000001 kinds of people in the world

Those who have dealt with floating point, and those who have not.

There are 10 kinds of people in the world

Those who understand binary, and those who don’t.

Chuck Norris, Zelensky, and God all walk into a bar.

The Bartender looks up, "Were were just about to start a new drinking game I've been working on. I call out a bragging point, and each one willing to meet it, chugs their drink. The last man standing due to matching every post and surviving every drink, gets the pot. Everyone else has to split the t...

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How many kinds of people?

(Inspired by the joke "there are 2 kinds of people, those who say there are 2 kinds of people and everyone else)

An interfaith conference is held on diversity. An attendee from each religion addresses their view on the kinds of people in the world.

An atheist rushes the podium and says...

Gordon Morgan...

was having all kinds of problems introducing himself at breakfast in Berlin.

While his friend Jim Apple was having similar problems in Paris

I was at the supermarket the other day buying dog food.

As I was standing in line for the cash register, there was a blonde girl behind me asking me if I had a dog (because why else would I be buying dog food, right?!) Anyway, my inner demon woke up, so I told her that I don't have a dog, but that I was planning on going on the "Happy Dog" diet. Also, I ...

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A quack posted a sign on his place which said "Can treat all kinds of illneses for $100. If I can't, I'll pay you $100"

A guy tried his luck and went inside.

Guy: hey doc, my sense of taste is messed up

Quack: Okay. Let me get the medicine from the second shelf and you'll drink one tablespoon of it

[*guy drinks medicine*]

Guy: [*spits*] fuck you, this is gasoline!

Quack: y...

It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.

When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift certificate envelope.
At the second house they presented him with a box of fine imported cigars.
The folks at the third house handed him a sel...

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