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A Teacher is giving out candy and the students are trying to guess the flavor.

No one can figure it out so the teacher gives a hint. "It's what your mother sometimes calls your father" The students look around for a minute and timmy in the back yells "SPIT IT OUT IT'S ASSHOLE!"

What was Jesus' favorite flavor?

Saviory

I absolutely hate the flavor of that pink antacid medicine.

It's pept-abysmal.

My favorite ice cream flavor is Death By Chocolate...

Because it satisfies two cravings at once

What is Donald Trump’s least favorite flavor of ice cream?

Peach Mint.

Soylent Cola, the soda made from grinding up people, is said to not have a set flavor

They say the taste varies from person to person.

What's Robert Kraft's favorite wing flavor?

Dry rub!

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[NSFW] A teacher is showing her class how to associate colors with flavors.

She gives Sally a green Lifesaver. Sally pops into her mouth and says, "it's lime!"

The teacher says, "very good." And hands Timmy a red Lifesaver.

Timmy tastes it and says, "it's strawberry!"

The teacher says,"correct." Next she gives Billy a brown, honey flavored Lifesaver. <...

What did Captain Flavor Flav yell at sea?

YEAAAAHHHH BUOOOOYYYY

If genres were flavors SCI-FI would be sour, Fantasy would be sweet, Horror would be bitter, Mystery would be umami...

And Erotica would be salty.

Please stop making new flavors of coca cola.

Either you put the cocaine back or leave it alone.

What flavor does anime absolutely hate?

Anything vanilla, apparently

I figured out Oreo's™ new mystery cream flavor!

...disappointment

I've never liked the flavor of cranberries..

the bitter taste *lingers* too much.

What flavor gum does the President prefer?

Governmint

Ill walk myself to the nearest border

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A man is driving down a road and sees a peach stand thats says “peaches in all flavors”

Curious by the stand’s name, he turns around to stop by. As he aproaches the stand he asks,

Man: “do you really sell peaches in all flavors”

Peach Vendor: “I sure do! What kind would you like?”

Man: “Ok well give me a peach that tastes exactly like an orange”

Peach vendor...

I think Kool-aid should make a Jonestown memorial flavor

But it wouldn't be very tasteful

Bert and Ernie are working at Ben and Jerry's when Bert invents a new flavor. He asks, "Ernie, will you name this flavor?"

"Sure, Bert."

What's Mario's favorite bagel flavor?

Ses-a-ME! Mario!

What is a poor man's favorite flavor of ramen?

Clearance

What's a scientist's favorite gum flavor?

.......Ex-*spearmint*.

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Me: how is your bacteria converted into lactose, mixed with some sugar and milk and fruit to give it that nice extra flavor?

Friend: It's called yogurt asshole

M&M's Came out with a Honey Flavor.

They coated the peanuts in the Peanut M&M's with honey.

They called them "Beez Nuts"

What do you call someone who can sit on an ice cream cone and tell you what flavor it is?

a smart ass

What flavor gum does a scientist prefer?

Exspearamint.

inspired by the presidential gum joke.

What flavor of chips do the citizens in the Elder Scrolls like the most?

Cyrodiill Pickle

What flavor of coffee is name for Joan of Arc?

French Roast

I'm trying out a new idea for using gum that's lost its flavor.

Right now, it's just an ex-spearmint.

(Sorry)

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A man was driving along a country road when he saw a sign that read "Peaches, All Flavors, 1 Mile."

A man was driving along a country road when he saw a sign that read "Peaches, All Flavors, 1 Mile." After seeing this he thought to himself, "I gotta see this!" After driving for a mile he saw the stand and pulled off to investigate.

"Hi, I saw your sign and want to know how you can have peac...

What is Lil Jon's favorite flavor of BBQ?

Mesquite squite squite.

...Forgive me I'm freshly smoked.

What is Donald Trump's favorite flavor of Tic Tac?

..... Tempermint

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What does smoking a cigarette and eating a pussy have in common? [NSFW]

The flavor gets stronger as you get closer to the butt.

What do designers of gum call new flavors from old ingredients?

ex-spearmints

What flavor do termites like best?

Chair-y

Being a man of many flavors.

I survived mustard gas and pepper spray, yesterday I was honored a seasoned veteran.

Did you hear Ben and Jerry's are naming a flavor in honor of Jerry Sandusky?

They are calling it Raspberry Turnover

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Guy walks into a bar

Sits down and asks the bartender for a rum and coke the bartender says ok and gives him an apple the man obviously confused looks at the bartender and says what the fuck is this I ordered a drink not an apple the bartender says just try it so he takes a bite out of the apple and to his surprise it t...

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A teacher handed out Lifesavers to her class.

She began to ask the children if they could identify the flavor by each candy’s color.

Pretty soon, the class had identified red for cherry, green for lime, yellow for lemon, and orange for orange. So the teacher tried a harder question. She handed out honey-flavored Lifesavers. Nobody cou...

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Lolipops

There was a 1st grade teacher helping her students by giving them lolipops to develop their sense of taste. She handed out lollipops of the same flavor to each student. She then questioned them about the flavor of the lolipops. The class replied in unison "Strawberry!". She replied "Very good class"...

A woman orders a very specific tea at a local cafe however the waitress mistakenly brings her a different one...

When the woman takes a sip of it, she notices this and tells the waitress that this is flavor is not her cup of tea.

Buying burgers is like dating.

If you get the ones with more fat, you’ll enjoy more flavor, but if you get the leaner ones, you’ll look better.

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Magic Apples

A man walks into a bar, and upon sitting down is promptly told, "This bar is incredible! The bartender serves apples of any flavor, any one that you can think of!"
"That's incredible, you can't expect me to believe that."
The bartender looks up and says, "It's true, mate. Any flavor."
"Okay...

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Typed this up, hoping it’s new blood.

Terry is going door to door selling peaches. He’s doing okay for himself, and he rounds the corner and comes upon an apartment complex. Lots of potential sales in one spot! He walks up to the first door and knocks.

The lady of the house opens the door wearing a robe which doesn’t leave much ...

Two girls weent for a smoke

Did you hear about the two mormon girls who went to beach to smoke a cigarette away from the watchful eye of their parents? One had never smoked before, and was surprised to see her friend pull two cigarettes out of a condom, where she had them kept away. Her friend explained this was the best way t...

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You know how they say blondes are dumb?

A blonde walks into an ice cream shop

She's greeted by the cashier who says welcome to my ice cream shop we have almost every flavor you can think of but unfortunately we are out of all chocolate items including ice cream and toppings so what are you having today miss?

She replies can ...

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Good Idea!

A man visits the doctor with a perplexing problem.
"Doc, everything I eat comes out exactly the same in the toilet."

The doctor, somewhat confused, asks, "Be more specific."

"If I eat a cheeseburger, later there's a cheeseburger in the toilet after I go."

The doctor says, "...

What can Lifesavers do that guys can’t?

Come in five different flavors.

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A trucker is driving down a random stretch of highway

He happens upon a billboard while driving that reads...

Peaches, engineered for your taste!
Only 10 miles!

Mildly intrigued, the driver decides to check out what this means. "Engineered for my tastes, what bullshit!", he says.

Driving for the next couple miles, he final...

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So it turns out there actually is a difference between necklace beads and anal beads.

Flavor.

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A guy walks into Baskin Robbins

Walks up to the counter and asks the employee

"What all flavors do you guys have?"

The employee names off all 31 flavors and the guy says

"I'll take a pint of chocolate"

The employee says "I'm sorry sir but we don't have any chocolate"

The guy says "Hmm, well w...

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[Long] [NSFW] One warm autumn day,

A man walks into the patent office and slams a stack of papers down triumphantly. "I've bred apples that taste like different fruits, and furthermore, each half of an apple tastes different!"

The patent clerk looks up in boredom, "Sure, sure... But I need to verify the truthfulness of this cl...

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A man was stopped at a farmer's market

When he comes across a stand advertising peaches of every flavor, he asks the owner "do you really have peaches in every flavor?" to which he responds "I sure do, what flavor are you looking for?" Doubting the owner the man asks for peanut butter and jelly, the owner selects a peach and hands it ove...

My mom was telling my little brother about the food she ordered....

she said it had a middle eastern flavor to it. I then said said “He doesn’t even know what that means!” To which he replied, “Yes I do, it just means there’s a bomb in it.”

A penguin is driving down the road

A penguin is driving through the desert and his car starts to sputter and loose power. He just barely makes it to a mechanic, the car stalling out as he coasted into the parking lot.

He walking in and asks if there is anything that can be done. The mechanic tells him that he’ll give it a look...

A man is driving down a road when he sees a wandering man with his thumb out

Being the nice person he was, he pulled over and let the man in.

“Aww, thank you! I’ve been out there for about 2 hours just with my suitcase!”

They got to talking, and eventually the man got to his stop.

“Thank you, and I never told you what was in my suitcase. Come on out of y...

Three mice walk into a bar...

After a few drinks, they get into a heated argument about how tough they are.

The first mouse says, “When I see a mousetrap, I lay on my back and set it off with my foot. Then, I catch the bar with my teeth and bench press it twenty times to work up an appetite. Only then do I make off with t...

I finally know why people like eating out MILFs

They got the umami flavor

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[NSFW] [Long] A man walks into a bar and...

The bartender asks his posion.

"I'd like a rum and coke." So the bartender pulls out an apple. "Excuse me, this is an apple." says the man. "Just trust me," replies the bartender. The man picks the apple up, and taking a bite, exclaims "This tastes just like rum!" "Turn it around," instructed...

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While waiting in line at an ice cream shop an elderly woman orders a plain chocolate cone.

The man behind the counter said “we’re out of chocolate today but there are other flavors with chocolate in them, what would you like?”

She again attempts to order plain chocolate. The man repeats “Ma’am we’re out of chocolate today but there are other flavors with chocolate in them, what wou...

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[OC, long] There's a new MLM scheme going around getting housewives to bake cookies, cake, and bread.

"Independent Businesses Owners" buy frozen pastries and mixes from the company, bake them in a timeshare commercial kitchen space, and try to sell them at their office, church, kids' activities, public events, and through social media. The typical.

One of my coworkers, Amanda, recently invite...

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A scientist goes into a kindergarten classroom...

A scientist goes into a kindergarten classroom to conduct an experiment. The experiment involves the kids eating gummy bears and judging by the color and taste, the kids will shout out the flavor.

The scientist gives them a red gummy bear and the kids can instantly tell that it’s strawberry....

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A guy walks into a bar...

and orders a rum and coke. The bartender tells they guy "coming right up" and reaches behind the bar, then places an apple in front of the guy. Confused the guy asks "what's this, an apple? I ordered a rum and coke." The bartender says "trust me take a bite". Reluctently the guy takes a bite. To his...

Jello has created a product that deters insects.

It's very effective, but the flavor is OFF-pudding.

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A roadside stand has a sign that says "PEACHES $5".

A roadside stand has a sign that says "PEACHES $5". A man thinks, "There must be something special about these peaches, I'll check it out." So the man pulls over and says to the one guy standing there. "Hi, I was wondering why these peaches are so expensive. Is there something special about them?"<...

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This bar has a special menu for it's customers...

A first customer walks in, and ask: Can I have a Rum & Coke, please?

The bartender: You got it! (hands over an apple)

Customer: Errr, I asked you for a Rum & Coke?

Bartender: Just try the apple.

Customer: (Bites on the apple) Oh my god! It tastes like Rum?

...

A chef was preparing for his busy Friday night shift…

A chef was preparing for his busy Friday night shift when his coworker called in sick. Friday nights were always busy at the restaurant and he was the only one working the kitchen. He decides to grab one of the busboys to help him cook for the night.

“Alright,” the chef says, “tonight is busy...

An existentialist, a nihilist, and an absurdist are baking cookies,

They've been at it for hours trying recipe after recipe, but they just can't get it right. Nothing they make tastes as good as they hope.

Eventually, the existentialist throws his hands up in despair. "Maybe we're going about this all wrong. Maybe we just need to accept that taste is subjecti...

Did you hear about the new pickle flavored bread?

So since Pickle flavor is in style now with sonics new pickle juice shake, I think I'm going to launch a line of pickle flavored pastry. I'm going to call it Dilldough.

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England: colour

America: color

England: flavour

America: Flavor

England: Labour

America: Labor

England: what the fuck are you doing?

America: getting rid of u

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A boy walks into an ice cream parlor....

The kid strolls up the counter, and the employee asks the lad....

"What flavor would you like?"

He looks over the list of flavors, and after a brief moment he says...

"Chocolate!"

With a sad face, the employee looks down to the boy and says... "I'm sorry, we're all out ...

When I was around 5, I asked mum why people were different colors...

She said because god wanted different flavors.

And that was the wrong thing to say, Because For the next 3 years, I thought god ate people after they died...

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