Why did the otter cross the river?

To get to the otter side

Where do otters come from?

Otter Space.

Juan Vega, the clam diver, found an injured sea otter and nursed it back to health.

From the moment the grateful otter was able to walk, it never left Juan's side. It even learned to dig for clams.

One day, a man went to Juan's house looking to hire him for a week. His wife answered the door.

'Sure,' his wife said. 'It will cost you $500.'

'That much?'

'...

A husband and wife are driving home and run over a otter.

They get out and find its still breathing but freezing cold. The husband says "Put it between your legs to warm it up" Wife replies "But its all wet and it stinks!" Husband says "Well hold its nose!".

Why did the otter want to work at NASA?

So he could go to Otter Space.

Where do otters come from?

Otter space.

[credit goes to Anne Carson, or wherever she heard it]

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

[GOD INVENTING THE WEASEL] You know what we need?

An otter you can't fucking trust.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A chicken walks into a bar..

..and orders five flagons of mead. After the fourth alcoholic beverage, the bartender asks him..

  

"Hey buddy why the long fac..oh wait not a horse lol."

  

The chicken gulps down his fifth drink and laments.

  

"You see, that ott...

I'm going to combine my hobbies of taxidermy and bomb making

And make you an otter you can't defuse.

I went to the zoo today....

only to find out that some aquatic mammals had escaped.

It was otter chaos.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

The lion party

Animals in the jungle are bored so the lion king decides to throw a party.. a savage party with drugs and orgies.. so he invites all the animals in the jungle buthe puts 3 rules
rule #1.. animals cant have sex with other animals of the same species
rule# 2 animals cant hace sex with other ani...

Beaver curry

A Canadian is showing his English friend around his hometown.

Canadian: "Have you ever tried beaver curry?"

Englishman: "Beaver curry,!?"

Canadian: " Yeah, it's like normal curry, but just a bit otter."

I get beavers and similar animals mixed up.

I otter know better.

What animal would you most like to be on a cold day?

A little otter

What did the seal say to the walrus after dating him for three months?

I think we should sea otter people.