UPJOKE
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What did the sunburnt manatee say?

Man a tee shirt would be nice

What do you get when you cross a manatee and a human?

Humanatee

Sea World threw me out for trying to ride the manatee

What's the big deal? It's not like I did it on porpoise!

What do you call a baby manatee?

A boyatee

So was at a bar last night and saw this fat chick wearing a shirt that said, "Caution, I'm a maneater". I walked up to the girl and timidly said, "Excuse me, Miss...about your shirt."

She interrupted me before I could continue and furiously shouted, "Oh let me guess, you're here to make a comment about how I'm so fat and how I actually eat men. I can't help my weight you know. I have feelings too and your comments can really hurt."

I looked at her, confused and said,"That'...

My wife and I were discussing people owning weird animals...

and she said, "I've always wanted to get a manatee." I said, "That's very kind of you. I will take it with two sugars."

My girlfriend and I were talking about pets, she said she'd like to get a manatee.

I just laughed and said, "Two sugars, please."

The temple of the giant sea cow has recently been rebuilt

Faith in huge manatee restored

My wife and I were talking about obscure animals.

She said, "I want to get a manatee."


"That's very generous," I replied, "no cream, no sugar please hun!"

Mermaids shouldnt be called mermaids

they should be called hu-manatee

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Crayola is now doing its color testing on manatees and peta is pissed.

Oh The Hue Manatee!

Why was the eskimo arrested by the United nations after killing a oversized sea mammal?

Crimes against huge manatee

What did the journalist say when he saw an obese sea cow explode?

Oh the huge manatee!

I picked out a color of grey paint the other day, I guess the salesman didn't like it.

He just said "Oh, the hue manatee."

Did you hear about that diaster that killed all those sea cows?

Oh the hu-manatee!

What's a mages favorite tea?

manatee

What's the best kind of tea overall?

thirs-tea

Why couldn't the ocean mage cast a spell?

He forgot to drink his manatee.

I am starting a sanctuary for oversized marine mammals.

It's called Habitat for Huge Manatees.

I saw a very large woman in a bar wearing a T-shirt that said 'I'm a Man-Eater'

I walked up to her, shot her a grin and she told me "Let me guess, you've got a joke about how many men I've eaten?"
I simply told her she spelled manatee wrong.

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