So was at a bar last night and saw this fat chick wearing a shirt that said, "caution, I'm a maneater".

I walked up to the girl and timidly said, "excuse me, Miss... about your shirt"

She interrupted me before I could continue and furiously shouted; "Oh let me guess, you're here to make a comment about how I'm so fat and how I actually eat men.. I can't help my weight you know. I have feelings...

What do you get when you cross a manatee and a human?

Humanatee

What did the sunburnt manatee say?

Man a tee shirt would be nice

My girlfriend and I were talking about pets, she said she'd like to get a manatee.

I just laughed and said, "Two sugars, please."

Sea World threw me out for trying to ride the manatee

What's the big deal? It's not like I did it on porpoise!

I saw a multicolored sea cow get hit by a boat

Oh the Hue Manatee!

Did you hear about that diaster that killed all those sea cows?

Oh the hu-manatee!

I picked out a color of grey paint the other day, I guess the salesman didn't like it.

He just said "Oh, the hue manatee."

I saw a very large woman in a bar wearing a T-shirt that said 'I'm a Man-Eater'

I walked up to her, shot her a grin and she told me "Let me guess, you've got a joke about how many men I've eaten?"
I simply told her she spelled manatee wrong.

What's a mages favorite tea?

manatee

What's the best kind of tea overall?

thirs-tea

A hillbilly is in Florida and has a sea turtle hanging up on a fishing pole.

The game warden approaches on his boat and asked, "Are you gonna release that?"
The hillbilly then replies,"No, they taste good."
"Oh really, how do they taste?"
"Somewhere between bald eagle and manatee."

My wife and I were discussing people owning weird animals...

and she said, "I've always wanted to get a manatee." I said, "That's very kind of you. I will take it with two sugars."

Why couldn't the ocean mage cast a spell?

He forgot to drink his manatee.

Manatees

A Spanish sailor and a French sailor are talking at a port bar together. The French sailor tells the Spanish sailor that he's been hearing stories of mermaids from the English sailors. The Spanish sailor says that mermaids are just a myth and the English just mistook manatees for mermaids. The Frenc...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Crayola is now doing its color testing on manatees and peta is pissed.

Oh The Hue Manatee!

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