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Hairdressers Jokes

[OC] Why are hairdressers suicidal

They just want to dye.

(My first oc please don’t hurt me)

"Mom, when do the hairdressers open again?"

"I'm dad."

What drug do hairdressers use the most?

Hairoin

A blonde walks into a hairdressers

She asks the hairdresser for a trim. The hair dresser asks her to take a seat but tells the blonde she needs to remove her headphones.

Blondie insists she can't remove them and the lady will have to do the best job she can.

After a while the hairdresser gets frustrated and says, "sorry...

Why are hairdressers never late for work?

They know all of the short cuts!

I walked into the hairdressers and sat down in the chair.

On the wall there was a sign that said: £70 for a haircut.

I gulped.

The woman assessed my hair and said, "Hello, sir. How much would you like off?"

I said, "About £55."

A new hairdressers for angry gamers opened up in my town.

It's called 'Dye Dye Dye!'

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy went to the hairdressers...

and sat down in the chair.

The hairdresser, a very attractive woman, places the cloak over him and gets to work. After a few minutes she notices that the cloak is moving up and down around the area of his crotch. Disgusted she whips the cloak off him

"How dare you do that in my salon!"...

Why did the band Sepultura have to go to the hairdressers?

Because you could see their roots, bloody roots.

I have come to realise how bad hairdressers are to have as friends.

They are always talking about you behind your back.

A Jamaican man has stormed into my hairdressers and demanded I give him a new style.

I'm dreading it.

Did you hear about the time Bob Marley went to the hairdressers?

He was dreading it

I went into the hairdressers and people were getting their heads cut off with giant pruning scissors

It was shear barberism.

A lady went into the hairdressers in Ashington (NE England)...

The hairdresser asked her what she'd like done.

"I'd like a perm please."

Somewhat puzzled the hairdresser began "Mary had a little learm..."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My wife asked me earlier before going to the hairdressers "What cut do you think would make me more attractive?"

"A fucking power cut" ....was apparently was the wrong answer!

From my 7 y/o

What do you call a bunch of hairdressers having a party?


A Barber-cue

Don't use Cops to protect the Capitol building!

Use barbers and hairdressers, the threat of a shave, shampoo and haircut should have most of them running for the hills!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A mother and her young daughter take a trip to the bakery where the daughter selects a delicious cupcake to eat.

On the way home the mother decides to stop and get her hair done at the hairdressers.
The mother takes a seat in the hairdressers chair and daughter plonks herself down next to Mum and starts eating her cupcake.
The hairdresser begins cutting away at Mums hair, looks down to the daughter and s...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

All anti-semites

Young Isaac knocks on his boss's door.
Boss: "come in!, yes Isaac what can i do for you?"
Isaac: "I can't work here anymore! I quit! Everyone who work here is anti-semite!"
Boss: "What? What are you talking about? I guess there might be one or two, but everyone? come on, it's ridiculous!"...

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