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Gangsters Jokes

Five gangsters walk past a local diner

The owner runs out the door and up to them saying, "Excuse me, I've got a problem and you're the only ones who can solve it!"

The gangsters look at each other confused and ask, "What, why us man?"

"I'll explain later, just come with me!" The owner replies. The curious gangsters follow ...

5 gangsters calmly walk into a bar.

Immediately, a Karen rushes up to them and starts yelling at them to get out.

"What are you doing!?" yells the bartender. "They haven't even been here for two minutes!"

"Well," the Karen retorts. "I've heard that 5G's are bad for the environment!"

Where do French gangsters hang out?

The baghetto.

How do gangsters receive communications?

Gmail

What do you call gangsters from Minnesota?

Oh, jeez.

Gangsters are the kindest people.

They gather in a group and ask what your problem is

What do You call a place where gangsters chill?

What do You call a place where gangsters chill?

G-Spot

What killed all the 1920's gangsters?

hepatitis see

Where do Italian gangsters come from?

The spaghetto

Where do gambling gangsters go after they die?

To the Gangster's-Pair-a-Dice.

Why do gangsters hold their guns sideways?

Because that's the way it came in the box.

What do you call gangsters living in the woods?

Cottage G's.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three gangsters in a fancy restaurant...

Three gangsters, Vito, Carlo, and Nick are sitting around a table in a fancy restaurant. They’ve just finished their meal and have ordered some brandy. While they’re waiting for the brandy Vito pulls out a cigar and a $50 bill. He sticks of the bill into the flame of the candle in the centre of the ...

A guy comes up to an Italian

and says, "you are a southerner. You are in the mafia"

So the Italian told him, "No, look. Not all southerners are gangsters."

But the guy kept insisting, he said, "No, no. You are a southerner. You are in the mafia"

The Italian tried to reason with him by telling him that they ...

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How do Japanese Gangsters say Hello??

WASABI


(What's up B!)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Back in the day, Chicago was run by the Irish mob

Now, before the Italian mob took over- I'm sure you all know Al Capone, Frank Nitti, Lucky Luciano, and the like- Prohibition era Chicago was run by the Irish mob.

The Irish gangs owned Chicago outright for a solid 18 months after Prohibition went into effect, before police raids, pressure fr...

A man walks into a bar

And sees two gangsters chating, one of them lifts his shirt, showing a horrible scar in his chest and says "Kansas city", the other does the same, lifts his shirt and shows a big scar in his back and says "Boston city". The man approaches them, lifts his shirt and shows a scar in the right side of h...

Unique sport tool

Gangsters come into sport shop and says:Hey Fred we need to beat some guys up! Fred:Hmmm this baseball bat should be good. Its have a signature of Babe Ruth! Hey Fred its real signature of Babe Ruth? Fred:No but if you beat that guys hard they will not ask about this.

I decided at a young age that I would get buried in the same way as my father

Unfortunately gangsters buried him alive

Side note,could someone please send help

A Hippo wants to join the local hippo gang

While speaking with the gang leader he's told in order to join the gang he must have respect for his brothers and impeccable manners.
He nods his head and let's the leader know he was raised in a noble, high class family. These things came easy to him.

The hippo struts out of the leaders r...

Why don't they let gansters play Quidditch?

Cause gangsters always catch the snitch!

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A local man wins the lottery.

After he’s cashed in his winnings he’s overwhelmed with joy, gratitude, and serenity. He wants to give back to his community and he thinks that everyone should get in on the feels. He decides to throw a grand party at his new mansion where anyone in town can come to eat and drink for free as long as...

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Some historic anti-Nazi jokes from Germany

Hey there. I thought, I'll take the time and translate you some of the so-called "FlĂźsterwitze"(whisper jokes) from nazi Germany.

* The old code of law seems to complicated, so it has to be changed. From now on, there are only three laws: 1. If you do something, or fail to do something, you ...

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Franz was reading his book on death row...

It was the ‘storm of the century’. On death row, Franz was reading his religious texts, looking for God, even as the inmates of the neighbouring cells were having an explosive argument about who should get to shower first. ’14 days to execution’, Franz thought, as he physically and mentally trembled...

The Spice Mafia

It is a little known fact that some people want spices that they cannot obtain legally. Be it decades-old oregano, salt from the Last Supper, or the flesh of Sean Spicer, some people love strange and unusual spices. However, in order to obtain these spices, they only have one place to turn: the Spic...

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