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Full Stop Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A lawyer gets pulled over by a police officer.

The officer asks the lawyer "Do you know why I pulled you over?"


"I haven't the foggiest idea," said the lawyer.


The officer replied, "You didn't make a full stop at the stop sign back there. You only slowed down."


The lawyer thinks for a few seconds then says, "If y...

I got arrested the other day for stealing full stops.

I'm looking at a long sentence.

A rookie cop is being trained by his sergeant

Unfortunately it's a pretty slow day. Finally the sergeant says "Okay, here's a hint. Pick a car and just follow him around. Before long he's bound to make a mistake, and you can pull him over for that." So the sergeant selects a car, and starts following it.

Unfortunately, it doesn't wor...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A London lawyer runs a stop sign..

And gets pulled over by an Irish cop. This hotshot sure knows he's better educated and definitely smarter than some random Irish cop. He decides to prove to himself how smart he is while having some fun at the cop.

Irish cop:"License and registration, please."

"What for?", lawyer asks....

There's a major traffic jam all through DC

All through Washington DC all traffic comes to a full stop...after many minutes people start getting out of their cars and talking. Before too long a guy starts walking car to car collecting donations, so I flag the guy down and ask him what the heck is going on! He explains there's been a major te...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

what's a British vampire's favorite sexual position?

Cunnilingus full stop.

I really hate using punctuations....

Full stop.

You don't joke about the London Underground at 8 am.

Full stop.

A man gets pulled over...

A man gets pulled over by a local sheriff. The sheriff walks up to the man’s window and says “I pulled you over because you didn’t come to a full stop at that stop sign back there.”

“Yeah, but I slowed down...” the man tells him.

Quickly, the sheriff reaches into the man’s car, grabs h...

My friend has been up in court for defacing library books

He was discovered tippexing all the full stops out, the judge said he should expect a long sentence.

A businessman is driving to an important meeting when his car breaks down...

Luckily, he breaks down near a mechanic, who agrees to tow his truck and fix it for him. However, the it would take awhile to fix, the businessman was going to be late if he didn't get going soon. Luckily, the mechanic had a donkey he was willing to lend to the businessman.

"There's only two...

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