African Grey Parrots are famously intelligent, but studies have shown that they consistently lose chess matches against ravens, jackdaws, and other corvids.

Said one researcher, "They just have trouble weighing the crows and pawns."

George Carlin once famously joked, "Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that."

Thanks to all those people wearing masks but leaving their noses fully exposed, the stupider half is now a lot easier to spot.

Albert Einstein once famously said...

"Every great quote will eventually be misattributed to Albert Einstein"

In Marrakesh, the food is famously tangy, but there is another Moroccan city where...

It is Tangier.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When Lorena Bobbitt famously cut off her husbands wiener and drove across town with it, she decided to throw it out the car window and when she did it hit the windshield of the car behind her with 2 old ladies in it, the driver said “what kind of bug was that!?” and the passenger said,..

“I don’t know but did you see the dick on that thing?!”

Einstein famously said that insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

But doing the same thing over and over again and actually getting a different result - that's called Computer Programming.

Some Pharises are about to stone a woman for adultery.

They come to Jesus, telling him that she was caught in the act, and the punishment for such a crime is death.

Jesus famously states, "let the one who is without sin cast the first stone."

The crowd begins to look around at each other, realizing there isn't a pure soul among them, when...

Thoreau famously said "Simplify, simplify."

It would have been simpler to say it once.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

(NSFW) Milton Berle had a famously large penis. Another comedian (who also considered himself well-hung) kept pestering Berle to have a contest comparing their tools.

Berle said, "Fine, but I'm only going to take out enough to win."

Bob Ross famously said that "we don't make mistakes, just happy accidents"...

Clearly he never played Tetris.

Abebe Bikila famously won the 1960 Olympic marathon while running barefoot.

Do you think his opponents tasted defeet?

Everyone knows the story of "doubting Thomas" and his reaction to the death and resurrection of Christ

He was famously known for insisting on seeing the wounds for himself, and while most think it was because he didn't believe the stories he was hearing, I know it was because he wanted to confirm that Jesus was indeed a holey man.

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