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Dragon Jokes

A dragon would never explode

But a dino might

Why couldn’t the dragon eat his birthday cake?

He destroyed it while trying to blow out the candles.

Why don’t you want to listen to a dragon’s story?

Because they tend to drag-on

[joke about Minecraft] Why can’t the Ender Dragon read a book?

Because she always starts at the End.

What did the tired dragon make for dinner?

Flamin yawn.

My niece told me this joke: What's the difference between Chanukah and a dragon?

Chanukah is always eight nights.

A dragon sometimes ate knights.

Why are dragon plushies soft and cuddly?

They aren't scale models.

Two Dragons walk into a bar

Dragon 1: It's hot in here

Dragon 2: Shut your mouth

I wanted to change my name to Dragon Ball Z...

My friend said, "Wow, that's a lot of papers you have to fill out!"
I said "Yeah, this isn't even my final form!"

What do you call a dragon without its silver?

Dr\_ \_on

It's a stupid science joke that lives in my head rent free.

Did you hear about the komodo dragon that couldn't get an erection?

Turns out he had ereptile dysfunction

Ok my 4 year old came up with this one, not sure he really understands how clever it is though... Why did the Dragon Cross the Road?

He wanted to eat some chicken.

Once there was a dragon slayer named Nick.....

Nick was a wealthy man, due to the fact that there were many dragons around the kingdom that required killing. The king of the land used to pay a great price for every dragon killed. But Nick had a deep secret, he had a massive desire to sleep with the queen, even if it was just for a night.
One...

What do you call Dragon with no silver?

A dron

A leprechaun, a walking tree, and a dragon walk into a bar

I should quit drinking

The Fighter and the Dragon

Old Man: Gather round, hear the story of how I fought the dragon!

Kid 1: Let's hear it!

Old Man:-

I was wandering the woods, eager for excitement, when I saw a horrible beast

It had the head and tail of a monstrous lizard, the body and feet of a great bear, and the stren...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Nick the Dragon slayer...

Once upon a time, and far, far away lived a beautiful Queen with voluptuous breasts.
Nick the Dragon slayer knew that the penalty for his desire would be death should he try to touch them.

One day Nick revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio the Physician, who was the King's c...

Did you hear about the very old dragon?

They said he started draggin balls.

How many Dragon Ball Z characters does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one but it takes 15 episodes.

A man walks into a bar

And orders a drink. Whilst drinking it, a massively scarred Asian dude stumbles in the bar.

"What happened?" The man asks as he downs his drink.

"There's a dragon 10km east from here." The Asian dude rasps before passing out.

So the Man gets on his bike and travels 10km east an...

When the singer from DragonForce came down with a cold...

He was hit with inspiration for their new hit song.

Through the Fire and Phlegm

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dragon Ball Z. Dragon Ball Z Who?

FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON DRAGON BALL Z

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dragon Ball Z is real.

Messi collected 7 golden balls and successfully wished for a world cup.

Dragon Ball fans are like creationists

If you talk about Evolution, they get mad.

What has a tattoo of a dragon squeaks when you eat it?

Halloumi Rapace.

Knight vs dragon

A knight is fighting a dragon. He cuts its head, but the dragon grows two new heads. The knight cuts them, but the dragon grows 4 heads. The knight cuts them, the dragon grows 8 heads. The knight cuts them, the dragon grows 16 heads. The knight cuts them, the dragon grows 32 heads. The knight cuts t...

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George and the Dragon

A poor vagabond, travelling a country road in England, tired and hungry, came to a roadside inn with a sign reading: "George and the Dragon." He knocked.

The innkeeper's wife stuck her head out a window. "Could ye spare some food?" he asked.

The woman glanced at his shabby clothes and...

How do you milk a Dragon?

By making 3 movies and a couple TV series about it.

Crouching tiger, hidden dragon.

It wasn't a great day at the zoo.

Who is Gordon Ramsays least favourite Dragon Ball character?

Frieza

What happens when a dragon gets bored of strip steaks?

Flaming Yawn

How do you synthesize/summarise Dragon Ball into one word?

The answer is: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...

Why do January 6 deniers never last very long in Dungeons & Dragons campaigns?

They always fail their Constitution checks.

Why did the yellow dragon keep slipping?

Banana for scale.

What did the komodo dragon mumma say to her hatchling?

You were a snaccident!

My dragon is asleep

He's dragoff.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A dragon catches three men

A German, a Japanese and a Russian. Tells them he'll give them a chance to live if they survive his fire blow. They can also hide behind one object.

German goes first and decides to hide behind a steel plate, claiming he believes in manufacturing and quality of products. Dragon blows at him a...

What’s a tired dragon’s favorite steak?

Flaming yawn

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Early one morning, you pull down your favourite cup, only to find a small dragon, curled up and sleeping contentedly inside.

Confused and still half asleep you take the cup outside to empty the dragon carefully onto the grass, then return to rinse your cup and make coffee. The next morning he is back, curled snuggly inside the cup as before and you repeat the process.

After a week of repeating this process you make...

Frieza from Dragon Ball Z gets a job as a medical receptionist

After a long day of fighting Vegeta comes into the Dr’s office to get some wounds looked at. As a new patient, Frieza directs him to fill out a hefty stack of new patient paperwork.

After some time, Vegeta brings his finished paperwork to Frieza only to be handed another stack of paperwork. ...

A tramp, seeking shelter on a freezing night, knocks on George and the Dragon Inn. A hefty lady answers the door and her expletives send him scampering. Desperate, he tries again minutes later.

"May... may I speak to George, please?"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Kill the Dragon

An evil and powerful dragon lives near a village.
It eats a virgin from the village every week.
No one can defeat it.

One day a hero comes and attempts to kill the dragon.
He finds that the dragon is too power to be defeated.
He decides to kill the dragon with intelligen...

Noah! Noah! The Unicorns are playing with the dragon eggs and won’t get on the ark!

Noah, “come help me with these squirrels, we’ll get to them later.”

Many Chinese restaurants have names like, Golden Palace, Golden Lotus, Golden Dragon...

But mine is named after my favourite dish, Golden Retriever.

Elon Musk is reported to have written a short joke on his Crew Dragon rocket

I guess the real joke will be in the comets.

How do dragon-type Pokemon solve their disputes?

They let bagons be bagons

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A hero comes to a village...

The villagers all looks very upset, so the hero ask what happen. "There is a huge dragon living in the mountain. Every week, it will come down and eat one of our virgin girls" the villager reply. The hero then promise to help. Two weeks later, the dragon starved to death.

A komodo dragon works security cameras at a store for other komodo dragons. Mostly, he makes sure no other dragon is spying on the customers.

He's a monitor monitor monitoring a monitor for monitoring monitors.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Boy asks, "Granny, have u seen my pills, they're marked LSD"

Granny replies, "Fuck the pills, have u seen the dragon in the kitchen?!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

They're coming out with a Dragon Ball Z for old people.

It's called Draggin' Balls Z

Have you ever seen a baby dragon eating ice cream?

It'll melt your heart.

What's the difference between a Dragon Ball Z episode and a Markiplier video?

A *Dragon Ball Z* episode doesn't have as much screaming

What is a European dragon’s favorite food?

Swiss charred.

I asked my karate instructor if I'd ever be able to do a dragon punch.

He said, "Suuuureyoucan!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Do y'know there's Dragon Ball Z smut?

Kamehameha Sutra

If Daenerys from Game of Thrones married Khal Moro instead of Khal Drogo, guess what she would've named her biggest dragon?

Moron.

Why did the pre-pubescent dragon lose the rap battle?

He couldn't yet spit hot fire

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There was once a kingdom, a long, long time ago. where a dragon would eat the virgins of the land.

Then one wonderful day, a hero came to the kingdom. The leader told the hero of their predicament. He told him that every day, the dragon would take a few virgins to his cave to eat. The hero said that he will save the kingdom, and take care of the dragon.


After two weeks, the dragon star...

Okay, we need a title for our fantasy novel involving dragons. Any ideas?

…Dragon?

It can’t just be Dragon.

Umm… Cragon?

No, that’s awful. Come on, think harder.

Umm…. Eragon?

….Bingo.

St. George the Dragon Slayer rides up to a huge cave

"Come out, Dragon, and fight me!" he shouts into the cave. But there is no response.
"Come out, and fight me to the death" he shouts even louder. Still no response. And the cave stinks absolutely awfully.
"Come out, you cowardly worm," shouts St. George one more time at the top of his lungs,...

How do you get dragon milk?

Find a cow with no back legs

How do you kill the ender dragon

You ender

I have an amazing joke about Dragon Ball Z.

Find out tomorrow on R/jokes!

Do you know why the Reddit Dragon is yellow?

It's got bananas for scales

My girlfriend smokes a lot, i call her the Dragon

Because she doesn't exist

So I went on Dragons Den with my grandad's shotgun and Peter Jones said, "so what's the business idea?"

I said, "It's a very simple concept, Peter. Put the money in the bag."

Some people say that Frieza was the best character in Dragon Ball Z, but...

I think his brother was cooler.

What do you call the act of giving annalingus on the back of a flying dragon?

A Skyrimjob

The prince, after a long and arduous battle, slew the dragon. He then ascends the mountain to an ominous castle holding the damsel. The prince makes his way to her room to rescue her. He enters and asks

What's your wifi password?

What's a Dragon Ball fan's favourite food?

Vegeta-bles

What's more impressive than the talking dragon?

A spelling bee.

Credit goes to a cheesestick wrapper!

The dragons don't like Jon Snow

You mother f***er...

Why do dragons like knights?

The come with their own pans.

Why do dragons sleep during the day?

So they can fight knights!

History is a lot like Imagine Dragons...

It's repetitive, never really good, and somehow only getting worse.

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