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When I was in 4th grade, one of the boys in my class called me "a homo" in front of the class and I thought it meant "homeless".

And I was confused, so I said, "But Jeremy, you've been to my house!"

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So you knows how you are supposed to say "no homo" whenever you are in an intimate situation with an other guy, so it isn't gay.

Well, that's pretty difficult to do with a dick in your mouth!

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If no homo makes you no gay, what makes you gay?

J.K. Rowling

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To prevent someone from saying you are gay, you say "no homo" so what do you say to prevent incest?

Roll Tide

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My bartender got extremely offended when I ordered a daiquiri and added "no homo"

Next time I'll just ask him to hold the fruit

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What do you call a Russian homo who’s been knighted by the Queen?

Sergei

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Most people have Homochromia, where their eyes are the same colour. I've got Heterochromia, and my eyes are different colours. So basically, God made me and said:

"You've got the most gorgeous eyes! No homo"

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I think one of my friends is gay

I’ve never heard him say no homo after our 10 hour Anal sessions. I’m starting to think he might actually be gay

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I can't stand all this homo and hetero talk lately

It's all Greek to me

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Why do archeologists believe the Neanderthal mated with Homo erectus?

They've found no evidence for the theory they mated with Homo flaccidus.

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I love you all as sapiens.

No homo.

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Who are the most homo-erotic pop group at Hogwarts?

Wand Erection.

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How do you say no homo in French?

No Oui oui

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What did the dominant allele say to the recessive allele?

No homo.

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When you say, β€œNo homo”, you’re really...

maintaining heterostasis.

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Why can't homosexuals tell jokes

Cuz they can't keep a straight face


Btw I'm not trying to target homos

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"No homo" [nsfw]

God said as he put the male g-spot several inches up Adam's ass

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What did they call conversion therapy back in the Stone Age?

Homo correctus

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A Topological Loop Walks Into a Bar, and Asks the Bartender "What's the Quickest Way to get Laid?" [NSFW]

A Topological Loop walks into a bar, and asks the bartender "what's the quickest way to get laid?"

The bartender answers, "Keep this under wraps, but check the second stall in the men's restroom. There's a glory hole there, and someone is in there right now."

The loop enters the bathro...

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Just slept with a species from another genus.

No Homo.

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[OC] After area 51 raid, Joe drugged and took an alien to his home. When the drug worn off, Joe saw the alien walking towards him with a massive boner and he asked Joe in perfect English with a seducing voice "Who are you, sexy thing"?

Joe replied... Sapien.. No homo

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What did Mother Earth say when she wiped out every last human being on the earth?

"No Homo"

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Santa wants to learn the subject Logic

he goes to his friend Banta, and says, this 'Logic' is really difficult for me to understand. Could you please help teach it to me.

Banta: well its really simple. let me give you an example. Do you have an aquarium in your house?

Santa: Yes

Banta: logically there must be fishes ...

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What the Aliens say before they fucked us up?

No Homo.

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I came out to my friend as gay, who in return came out as gay

Makes all the times we fucked before then seem like he didn't mean the no homo

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Flying lessons

A guy is telling his buddy about his flying lessons and the guy teaching him says he is Eigth degree black belt and a raging homosexual and if I don't succumb to his sexual advances I have to jump out of the plane. Buddy "Well did you jump?" "Yea a little at first"

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Homosexuality should not be accepted in a civilized society.

It is an abomination. "sexuality" has a Latin root and "homo" is Greek. Really the word should be ideosexuality!

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A student is looking for a university minor...

He finds a professor of assumption...

He asks what it is all about.

The professor asks, "Do you have a dog?"

"Yes, I do"

"So I assume you have a yard for a dog?"

"Yes, in fact"

"I assume you have a house then?"

"Why yes I do!"

"Therefore I assu...

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What do aliens say to each other when they see a city full of Homosapiens?

Damn, look at all those homos

The history of human evolution is confusing...

There’s so many *Homos*, it’s hard to keep them all straight.

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What did the straight male gorilla say after he fucked a human male to death?

No homo

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Choking on the Phonetic Alphabet

Last week, I was registering for a website when I ran into a little trouble and had to call their customer support. We were going through some basic form information and he was having trouble understanding my spelling so he told me to use the phonetic alphabet.

For those of you that don't kn...

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The year: 2029. A brilliant scientist is constructing the first sentient artificial intelligence.

He's working out of his garage in San Francisco, living on charitable donations from his worried friends. He dropped out of college when he realized he could change the world β€” there's no going back; his life is dedicated to this project. At first, he is met with failure upon failure. But then, he r...

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What's it called when you kill a bunch of gay's?

Homocide

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Neanderthal and Cro-Magnon men were just so fit and strong and sexy.

No homo

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A kid gets onto his school bus and starts annoying the bus driver...

The little kid sits down in the front seat and starts saying
kid:"If my parents were tigers, id be a little tiger!'
kid: "If my parents were giraffes, id be a little giraffe!"

Bus Driver: "shut up, shut up"

Kid: "If my parents were dogs id be a little dog!"

finally the dri...

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New fish...

It's a guy's first day in prison and he's not taking to it very well. He's off in the corner with that thousand -yard stare, hugging himself and rocking back and forth.
An old timer takes pity on him and walks over.

"How ya' doin', Kid? Having a rough time I see."

"Yeah, well- lo...

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Why did Alan Turing love matrices ending in zero?

Cause he was a homo genius.

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As a guy, wearing Crocs is a lot like getting a blowjob from another man...

It feels great until you look down and realize you're a homo.

What species is Mike Pence?

No-homo sapiens.

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I was at the Natural History Museum

and I saw the Neanderthal exhibit. Those guys were buff studs.

no homo

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