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Mythology Jokes

What's the difference between religion and mythology?

A few hundred years.

Mike Tyson gets really upset if you talk to him about Norse mythology.

It’s a Thor subject.

My poor knowledge of Greek mythology...

...has always been my Achilles' elbow.

I feel like, in mythology, Neptune is just a copy of Poseidon

Like whoever created Neptune literally read what Poseidon’s main powers were and was like “Ctrl C”

According to Greek Mythology, Chiron was a half-human, half-horse doctor.

This made him the Centaur for Disease Control.

An expert in Greek mythology walks into a bar...

Then he suddenly sees stars spinning around to form shapes, and he feels as if he’s been struck by Zeus’s lightning. Then, while collapsed on the ground, he sees Zeus himself staring down at him. A day later, he wakes up in a hospital bed to see a doctor looking at him.

“Why did that happen...

Who was the hottest woman in Greek mythology?

Medusa...one look from her made guys rock hard.

Did you hear the joke about the shield from Greek mythology?

I would think so, it's been around for aegis.

What's a Dominatrix's favorite creature in Greek mythology?

PegAsses

Not knowing about Greek mythology is my Achiless' Horse.

Uh oh, I've really opened a Pandora's Labyrinth here

People say I'm not good with Greek Mythology...

I guess that it's my Achilles wrist.

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Greek mythology in 3 words

Zeus got horny

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I have an unhealthy sexual attraction towards figures in Greek mythology ever since

\
I laid my eyes on Medusa. Been rock hard ever since.

Im not very good with greek mythology

Thats my Hercules Heel

Egyptian mythology has become popular in Syria

Isis has been blowing up over there

In Greek Mythology, the Gorgon sisters Stheno, Euryale, and Medusa had the power to turn anyone who looked at them into stone.

But few people know that there was a fourth Gorgon sister named Zola.

She had the power to turn her enemies into cheese.

Mythology gags, anyone?

What can kill you with a glance and goes "Hittthhh"?

The Basilisp.

Mythology Joke.

Medusa is so hot every time i see her i get rock hard.

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It's interesting how mythology has permeated our culture. Just look at Oedipus...

he's the most famous motherfucker around.

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My Favorite Character From Greek Mythology is the Crazy Brother of Hercules...

... Testiclees.

He was nuts.

Is the tale of St Patrick driving the snakes out of Ireland just mythology?

No, it's hiss-story.

I read about this figure from Greek Mythology, Chiron.

He trained many heroes apparently, and was also a doctor. Ergo he was a Centaur for disease control.

If you don't know a lot of creatures in Greek Mythology...

I'll give you a mini-tour

I'm AMAZED by mythology. I'll tell you about my favorite tales...

if you have a minotaur two. (amazed... get it?)

In Greek mythology, Chiron was known for his knowledge and skill with medicine

One could even call him the Centaur for Disease Control.

He was a big believer in herd immunity.

Hercules returned after his most recent adventure in the city of Molione...

Hercules returned after his most recent adventure in the city of Molione where he defeated the demigod brothers, Eurytos and Kteatos, who were siamese twins and had the strength of 2 demigods.

At the temple, Hercules spoke to his father Zeus and asked him why he had to slay them when the gods...

i picked up this copy of the Iliad the other day...

I picked what I thought was a copy of the Iliad the other day. But when I started reading it, I saw someone had just slapped the dust cover from The Iliad on a YA Fantasy novel based upon Greek Mythology. That's when I realized I had been RickRiordaned.

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The whole Greek Mythology could be summed up in one line............

"Unfortunately, Zeus was feeling a bit too horny."

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A man dies and goes to hell

The man is greeted by a demon when he arrives. He asks “where’s all the fire and brimstone and Torture devices?”

“Oh no no no, that’s all just mythology! We don’t do any of that down here in Hell! Let me walk you through the schedule. Do you like to eat?”

“Yeah! I love a good meal!” S...

I almost had a 4.0 at University.

It turns out that Greek mythology was my Achilles elbow.

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I’ve been trying to learn more about Greek mythology…

… but I keep mixing up Sisyphus and Oedipus. I know one fucked his own mother. The other had to roll a boulder up a hill. And believe me, if you knew my mother, you would confuse those two things as well.

[Possibly OC] Objectifying women has been going on since mythical times.

For example, in Greek mythology, a female elf was called a Shelf.

Pub Quiz

I did terribly in the Greek Mythology section of the Pub Quiz last night. You could say it's my Achilles Wrist.

Historians have discovered more information about the Ancient Greek hero, Bophades

According to Ancient Greek mythology, Bophades was a powerful hero, much like Achilles. In fact, the two heroes are very similar. Achilles had a weakness in his heels, and historians have now discovered that Bophades had a weakness in his groin. Many people have heard of Achilles's heel, but have yo...

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