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Expectancy Jokes

Patient: What's my life expectancy?

Doctor: 120

Patient: 120 what? Days? Weeks? Months?

Doctor: 119

The average life expectancy of alligators is about 50 years...

So there is no rush, you indeed can see it later.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Recent study shows that masturbating twice weekly increases life expectancy by 20%.

I've done the maths. I am immortal.

I asked the doctor what my life expectancy was.

He said, "Financial troubles leading into a long-term bout of depression before an inevitable death."

How to solve issues with life expectancy

The doctor has given me four months to live.
I shot the doctor, The judge gave me 20 years.
Problem solved

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