UPJOKE
variationversionvariablediscrepancyformdifferentdeviationmutationmodificationstraintypemodelvarietyvariationsalternate

The Omicron Variant is like a Katy Perry song.

Mild but pretty catchy.

Watch out for that new "Peekaboo" variant the CDC has been warning about...

It's been sending everyone to the ICU.

How will you know if you die of the Delta variant of COVID?

On your way to heaven or wherever, you'll make a stop in Atlanta.

*Edit: Thanks for the upvotes and comments. Per feedback, it might be better as "On your way to heaven, you'll have a layover in Atlanta."*

Scientists are worried about a new variant of COVID that makes you sweat mayonnaise...

...but don't worry, they're confident they can contain the spread.

It's only a matter of time before the Pi-variant of the Coronavirus is discovered now.

We'll have come full circle then.

The Delta Variant is burning through the South so quickly

They should call it the Sherman Variant

I’m especially worried about the π variant of COVID.

It’s been several millennia, and π is still unsolved.

Did you hear about the new variant they’ve discovered in France?

Scientists have called it O-Macron.

Naming the COVID-19 variants, the WHO skipped the greek letter 'xi'.

They did that in order to not insult the leader of West Taiwan.

Some Irish scientists measured the size of the coronavirus variant.

It was one O'Micron.

It's the Covid variant after Omicron I'm really worried about...

it may go on forever

I’ve heard that since Covid has so many variants they’ve decided to rename it.

To Skyrim.

The new Pi variant of COVID-19 is so infectious...

you'll need to keep at least 3.1416 m apart.

Word on the Street is, Cookie Monster has COVID…

It's the Om nom nom nomicron variant.

Did you hear they discovered the 13th variant of the covid virus?

It's Nu.

Just found out my pal has the Indian variant of Covid

At first he felt unwell, then he slipped into a korma

Did you hear the Cookie Monster got Covid?

The CDC confirmed it was the om-nom-nom-nom-icron variant.




Edit: Thanks for the gold kind stranger!

Edit 2: Thank you everyone for the awards. Just trying to brighten everyone's day with a little joke. I hope this joke spreads far and wide....like Covid. Stay safe everybody...

Joke of the Day:

HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT
The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term. The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying...

If I get the UK variant of coronavirus will my cough sound different?

Like instead of COUGH COUGH UGHH is it more like AHEM ERM His Majesty David Beckham has come to take your spices and subjugate your people AHEM AHEM

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Another joke thread...What's your best: I'm as/so angry ________ (or variant)

Here's mine: I'm more pissed off than a dragon trying to blow out birthday candles.

The Queen is laying in hospital with her children at her bedside.

“The doctors remain optimistic but I worry my rule is coming to an end”. She says.

“But the Doctors say you have the omicron variant, do they not?” Said Charles.

“That’s right”, she replied.

“And the Symptoms are minor are they not?” He continued

“It’s true, but my body i...

How did the British variant of Covid spread?

Through British airways.

i found a talking tree

i woke up one day and i heard a crying voice, i followed it and i found the source to be from a cut down tree

i said: "hello?"

the tree said crying: "what do you want?"

i asked: "you can talk?"

the tree answered: "yeah I'm a rare variant, now you answer my question: who...

Why God? Why?

One day a fellow was watching Fox News and learned about a new virus that was rapidly spreading and quickly killing those who got sick with it. The nightly news reports got worse and worse, this Covid-19 virus was spreading around the world and killing increasingly large numbers of people. But he wa...

Have you heard about the new Covid strain going around?

The symptoms include loss of taste and smell, descent into horrific raving madness from gazing at Cthulu's twisted visage, and runny nose.

It's the Necromnicon variant.

Variants for running.

Variants for running:-

1. Hot girl in front of you.
2. Creepy guy behind you.

(If 1 applies to you, you're probably 2)

Hoping to get over the pandemic this year...

It's been pretty bad since the world caught covid 19 in 2019. I've been hearing rumors about the possibility of new variants all over the news. Let's hope we don't catch 22 this year.

COVID-19 plagues a rural country town in the States.

Lockdowns have been imposed, and the infection rate is rising fast. An overweight and diabetic anti-masker is standing on the steps of the church, going against lockdown procedures, when a bystander coming from the grocery store walks by. “Better return home man, the infection rate is rising fast!”<...

What type of Covid are cows most susceptible to?

The Mu variant.

A famous car designer...

A famous car designer was about to retire at the age of 64 due to health concerns. For all his life, he had strived for perfection in his craft of designing cars, specifically for Kia. In each of his 32 models, he was instrumental in some innovation or vastly improved function.

He called for ...

Persons who received the COVID-19 vaccine are kindly requested to come to the nearest 5G cell tower...

...to download upgrade for the new COVID-19 variants.

So you've probably heard

So you've probably heard the Brazilian variant of COVID is a bit more infectious than what we have here up north.

Don't worry, I hear things are going to clear up a lot down south when they get a Brazilian Vax.

My girlfriend bought me Olympian brand Condoms...

Before she left, I asked if she could buy the Gold Medal variant, she came back with the Silver Medal, saying; "I don't want you coming first this time"

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